DEATH
Ok im new here..and thank God I found this.. well anyway really wanted a journal for a long time coz too many things is inside my head right now that I couldn’t breath sometimes.. the thing is that my reality is ok.. have a wonderful wife, I love my work but I hate my boss, have a nice life..but I guess sometimes I want something that I don’t know what it is so basically im searching..
Been depressed for two weeks now and few days ago something bad happened, the husband of my cousin died of cancer.. he was diagnosed I dono when then suddenly my mom called me and she said he collapsed and died… poop! Mmm.. im thinking if I die this minute will Ill be able to know if im dead or just passed out..will it hurt knowing you cant breathe or the idea your not with the one you love and not sayin you love them so much and you don’t want to die..ok how how bout you eatin and then get choked by a large chunk of meat!?? Stupid way to die. Too stupid to chew!! I remember one time I had this japanese creative director, well basically he’s a Filipino by accident..by birth.. he hate bein a Filipino… that A#%#%$E!! he was so weird he just took a kamote-Q.. it’s like potato chips but using kamote and sugar and its half inch thick.. so he didn’t asked who owns that and shoved it in his mouth then after a few seconds he was choking.lol.. everyone panicked with a smile on their face J .. everyone is tryin to hit his back knowin if they do that they’ll helped him swallow it or blow it out..had a mental note that time that I wont be stupid enough to choke or die with those fools.. so I started chewing my food when im with them.. back to TANIZAKE!! That was the first time I saw a man turned blue!.. like a smurf! Anyway I was tryin to just watch and minding my own business but the poor guy is tryin not to die and he’s bein beaten to death..so what I did was hit 3 times in the back.. hard as hell.. hey im just human.. wanted to do that for years.. well I did the Heimlich on him..then I just saw the poor kamote flew.. in slowmo!! YAY!! Mmm.. im beginning to feel better now.. OH!! He survived…
Guess I need to stop…
Ok one last thing.. im tryin to think that I have a rope round my neck, experiencing a short drop and a sudden stop..
Been depressed for two weeks now and few days ago something bad happened, the husband of my cousin died of cancer.. he was diagnosed I dono when then suddenly my mom called me and she said he collapsed and died… poop! Mmm.. im thinking if I die this minute will Ill be able to know if im dead or just passed out..will it hurt knowing you cant breathe or the idea your not with the one you love and not sayin you love them so much and you don’t want to die..ok how how bout you eatin and then get choked by a large chunk of meat!?? Stupid way to die. Too stupid to chew!! I remember one time I had this japanese creative director, well basically he’s a Filipino by accident..by birth.. he hate bein a Filipino… that A#%#%$E!! he was so weird he just took a kamote-Q.. it’s like potato chips but using kamote and sugar and its half inch thick.. so he didn’t asked who owns that and shoved it in his mouth then after a few seconds he was choking.lol.. everyone panicked with a smile on their face J .. everyone is tryin to hit his back knowin if they do that they’ll helped him swallow it or blow it out..had a mental note that time that I wont be stupid enough to choke or die with those fools.. so I started chewing my food when im with them.. back to TANIZAKE!! That was the first time I saw a man turned blue!.. like a smurf! Anyway I was tryin to just watch and minding my own business but the poor guy is tryin not to die and he’s bein beaten to death..so what I did was hit 3 times in the back.. hard as hell.. hey im just human.. wanted to do that for years.. well I did the Heimlich on him..then I just saw the poor kamote flew.. in slowmo!! YAY!! Mmm.. im beginning to feel better now.. OH!! He survived…
Guess I need to stop…
Ok one last thing.. im tryin to think that I have a rope round my neck, experiencing a short drop and a sudden stop..