holiday wishlist
Without going into too many details, I've been really busy and exhausted, and then the last two days have been just... utter, utter garbage. Like after the day I had on Sunday I felt like I needed a few days to recover, and then Monday was EVEN WORSE somehow (all due to unexpected issues, mostly to do with my car).
My car is about 13 years old, it's not new, but I guess I've been lucky that until now I've never had the "unexpectedly have to spend in one month an amount you'd normally spend across 4 years just to have your car working" situation. But, well, it's happened to me at last.
Everything about it was infuriating and frustrating and terrible, and the worst part is that I felt like I'd thrown everything I had at the problem and it was still an utter nightmare, and because of how much it cost I still feel like a failure deep down inside, even though I know this sort of thing happens occasionally and I'm not special.
It's still not fully resolved! But the last 2 days were just too much, I can't spend another day killing myself over this stuff, so I'm taking a break to deal with other trivial things, like job hunting.
Of course the year that this happens is the first year when I'm unemployed in my adult life.
Anyway, a thing came across my radar, through someone on my flist, that people are doing holiday wishlists again. I checked and I haven't done one since 2012, but of all the holiday themed exchanges/memes/etc I always found wishlists to be the most accessible and low stress ones.
So, I wrote up my wishlist at
holiday_wishes. And man, just writing it up brought back so many memories. If I was writing one for this journal, for people who know me, it would be slightly different, but just remembering all the wonderful responses I got in 2011-2012 was really amazing and heartwarming.
I actually realized that I stopped doing wishlists when I stopped being a full time college student. Probably because I felt like, having a proper job meant I should invest in granting wishes instead of asking for things. I remember growing up in fandom, always being awed and humbled by people's generosity, and thinking I'd pay it all back when I was a Real Adult.
And I did! I've given to a lot of charitable fandom causes, granted various wishes, etc. Even when the pandemic first started I remember finding people who needed money for various projects or gifts and thinking - I want to help out because I still have a job when so many others don't.
And now I don't have a job again! Haha. /o\ So, I guess it makes some kind of sense that I felt comfortable posting a wishlist again.
Anyway, it's a really tough week in a tough year, and there's lots of stuff on my wishlist that requires only your time and attention, so if you feel like it, there it is.
But regardless of any of that, let me just say, the world was garbage to me in a profound way, and then I remembered there are strangers on the internet who will read a list of things that would make me happy and actually do some of those things to make me happy, and it's just... sometimes fandom in a magical place, and I'm very grateful for that reminder.
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My car is about 13 years old, it's not new, but I guess I've been lucky that until now I've never had the "unexpectedly have to spend in one month an amount you'd normally spend across 4 years just to have your car working" situation. But, well, it's happened to me at last.
Everything about it was infuriating and frustrating and terrible, and the worst part is that I felt like I'd thrown everything I had at the problem and it was still an utter nightmare, and because of how much it cost I still feel like a failure deep down inside, even though I know this sort of thing happens occasionally and I'm not special.
It's still not fully resolved! But the last 2 days were just too much, I can't spend another day killing myself over this stuff, so I'm taking a break to deal with other trivial things, like job hunting.
Of course the year that this happens is the first year when I'm unemployed in my adult life.
Anyway, a thing came across my radar, through someone on my flist, that people are doing holiday wishlists again. I checked and I haven't done one since 2012, but of all the holiday themed exchanges/memes/etc I always found wishlists to be the most accessible and low stress ones.
So, I wrote up my wishlist at
holiday_wishes. And man, just writing it up brought back so many memories. If I was writing one for this journal, for people who know me, it would be slightly different, but just remembering all the wonderful responses I got in 2011-2012 was really amazing and heartwarming.
I actually realized that I stopped doing wishlists when I stopped being a full time college student. Probably because I felt like, having a proper job meant I should invest in granting wishes instead of asking for things. I remember growing up in fandom, always being awed and humbled by people's generosity, and thinking I'd pay it all back when I was a Real Adult.
And I did! I've given to a lot of charitable fandom causes, granted various wishes, etc. Even when the pandemic first started I remember finding people who needed money for various projects or gifts and thinking - I want to help out because I still have a job when so many others don't.
And now I don't have a job again! Haha. /o\ So, I guess it makes some kind of sense that I felt comfortable posting a wishlist again.
Anyway, it's a really tough week in a tough year, and there's lots of stuff on my wishlist that requires only your time and attention, so if you feel like it, there it is.
But regardless of any of that, let me just say, the world was garbage to me in a profound way, and then I remembered there are strangers on the internet who will read a list of things that would make me happy and actually do some of those things to make me happy, and it's just... sometimes fandom in a magical place, and I'm very grateful for that reminder.
comments on Dreamwidth