Behind the Sex - Chapter 35
Title: Behind the Sex
Fandom(s) : U-KISS
Pairing(s): KeMaru
Rating: NC-17
Genre: AU, Romance
Warnings: Awful!English
Author's Notes: My second NaNoWriMo, and a rather bold decision, if I might say :)! Hopefully doesn't contain too much inaccuracies, and if it does, please ignore it? >_>?
Prologue :: Chapter 1 :: Chapter 2 :: Chapter 3 :: Chapter 4 :: Chapter 5 :: Chapter 6 :: Chapter 7
Chapter 8 :: Chapter 9 :: Chapter 10 :: Chapter 11 :: Chapter 12 :: Chapter 13 :: Chapter 14 :: Chapter 15
Chapter 16 :: Chapter 17 :: Chapter 18 :: Chapter 19 :: Chapter 20 :: Chapter 21 :: Chapter 22
Chapter 23 :: Chapter 24 :: Chapter 25 :: Chapter 26 :: Chapter 27 :: Chapter 28 :: Chapter 29
Chapter 30 :: Chapter 31 :: Chapter 32 :: Chapter 33 :: Chapter 34
The sixth month started exactly eight hours ago, Kibum mused. Just thirty more days till…the end? There was barely anything left to do for his research, and in fact, the whole experience might even be too lengthy for a mere school report. Nevertheless, he stood by the black car he sort of owned, waiting to fetch Kevin to the partnered hotel.
Why?
Because he was becoming selfish.
He wanted to know.
There has been something different about Kevin since only a while ago, and listening to his recent drunken confession, it could only mean that Kevin had fallen in love with someone right before his very eyes. And this shouldn’t be how it all turns out. He should have known, but because he doesn’t, he wants to.
Kibum thought back to his life five months ago, when he had no idea what he wanted his six months long project to be about. He only had an inkling - it had to be impactful, and nothing else. All else were decided along the way without much thought and Kibum wasn’t sure if he should be proud that his unconscious mind managed to bring him so far.
What was the project about again? Oh, right.
Kibum paused as he reviewed his position once more. Sighing softly, he knew he had broken the unspoken rule that stated he should not intervene with his subject’s problems quite a few times. It wasn’t like him at all to offer his help, but then again, it wasn’t like him to fall in love.
Even worse, the younger had also intervened in his own world, easing the tension Kibum had with his father.
The project was a big failure in so many different ways, yet oddly enough, Kibum didn’t feel bad about it.
-
Kevin wrapped his arms around Kibum’s neck, fingers threading through the recently trimmed hair as both their lips met. Kibum then shifted slightly to bring Kevin’s weight closer towards himself, barely concentrating on the kiss Kevin was dominating. He smiled softly as Kevin gently stroked his ears, and slowly laid the younger on the bed.
Kevin watched himself from Kibum’s eyes as the older man pulled away, his own breathless self reflected in Kibum’s dark orbs. He could almost call his current look disgusting, but the soft gaze Kibum had just didn’t tell the same story.
The older man slid his hands from around Kevin’s waist up to his neck, leaning down again only to stop right when the tip of their noses touched. He chuckled lowly, slightly grazing past the younger’s lips to leave a soft kiss on Kevin’s neck. Fingers then dancing down the defined collarbone, Kibum started unbuttoning Kevin’s shirt.
It was a pure coincidence that Kevin was wearing a buttoned shirt, mirroring the time when they first met. He remembered the hesitant fingers that couldn’t do a thing and how it could never compare to the present Kibum, hands skilfully removing the shirt from Kevin’s torso.
His first impression of this man was that he was too stiff, too uptight. Kibum constantly wore this stoic expression and never made any noise during their sex, infuriating Kevin to no end. Sure, he was young and handsome, but he was still getting on Kevin’s nerves and hurting his pride with the dull response.
Kevin smiled softly as Kibum reached the last button, and wondered how long it has been since they first met. This man on top of him had a different atmosphere around him than the one before, and maybe that meant they both changed.
Both.
Because it felt like he was reborn from that moment on.
“Focus.” Kibum frowned slightly at the sight of Kevin’s gentle and almost distracted smile. He leaned down and watched Kevin’s eyes, barely showing the fact they were dazed for moment. “On me.”
The younger man raised his hand to up the other’s face, staring back into Kibum’s eyes. Was Kibum being jealous? Of himself?
Kevin wished he could tell of how he had been focusing this whole while on the man before him, and that Kevin’s world no longer revolves around himself. He was rotating round Kibum aimlessly, like a pawn piece sent to war without so much of a thought.
And there wasn’t any problem with it because he’ll submit himself anytime for a general like the other.
So it was kind of funny that Kibum would be jealous of himself, but Kevin couldn’t bring himself to share the joke. Because every other word waiting to slip out from his lips speaks of love for the other.
Kibum raised him up and tried to pull the shirt off Kevin’s arms, pausing when the sleeves hooked on.
“Well, if the shirt likes you so much, you can keep it on.” Kibum grinned, pressing a short kiss on Kevin’s forehead.
Kevin subtly frowned, only enough to test if the muscles on his forehead went numb from Kibum’s kiss. The lingering feeling can almost be called innocent, so why the hell did it turn him on?
Kibum held onto the younger’s waist gently, and then lowered himself to kiss the exposed collarbone, gradually heading south. Pausing in his motion as he felt Kevin fighting the shirt’s restraints, he teased the already hard nubs with a slight kiss purposely aimed way off.
The younger man groaned, though part of him knew he could easily slip the shirt’s sleeves off his forearms. Leaving his hands strengthless, he squirmed beneath Kibum, knee rubbing against the other’s covered length. Kibum then moved onto the other nub, tongue first wetting the spot, tickling, and then gently biting down.
“Kibum-ah...” Kevin moaned, hands hugging Kibum's head closer while his fingers intertwined with the tousled hair. “Ki-”
Kevin bit his lower lip, unable to resist Kibum’s path down his own body. He felt himself shudder from the sheer pleasure, every inch of his muscles tensing, convoluting under the other man. He wanted to fight his reflexes, to relax and reach euphoria the way Kibum always brought him to, but somehow his body got more and more sensitive.
The older man then held his waist more firmly as if knowing, blowing lightly against the erected length he had went south for.
Taking in the hard member slowly, Kibum forced Kevin’s hips back down as the younger tried to thrust right into Kibum’s mouth. He could say Kevin was different today, lacking all the self-control he had learnt through the years of selling sex. And Kibum doesn’t think he would mind it, seeing as Kevin would never let another man see him this way.
Smirking slightly, Kibum scraped his teeth against the heated skin of Kevin’s member.
Kevin writhed a lot more violently, hands jerking Kibum's head backwards to pull the older away from his throbbing member, and then towards him face to face. With his own questioning eyes almost blinded by the desperate lust his body was aching for, he saw the consciousness of Kibum’s mind from those deep eyes. The ones he could still remember from their first meeting, the ones that left an impression, the ones beckoning him.
As if trying to swallow every image, every scene, those eyes just kept drawing him closer towards the abyss called love.
If he falls, he loses.
And he has already fallen, he has already lost himself.
Kibum laid on top of the younger, watching the other to grasp the momentum. He paused, concentrating on the rise and fall of Kevin’s chest following his every breath, himself almost unconsciously trying to match the other’s rhythm. The two then breathed in silence for a brief moment, as Kevin searching for hints of love in those eyes. And he felt like he needed to explain himself, to ensure Kibum there wasn’t anything weird.
“I wanted to see...what you look like when you do things to me.” Kevin said shakily, praying Kibum didn't understand.
He only realised too late. That any actions he did or any excuses he made are always so easily seen through by the other.
Kibum frowned slightly, but not enough under the low light for Kevin to see. He wanted to ask why. Why Kevin would ask such a thing was beyond him, afterall. It wasn’t like Kevin, it wasn’t the words he expected to hear from Kevin - his research subject for five months now. He should have understood this man like the back of his hand, but keeps getting confused over the unexpected situations presented before him.
He had a crossroad yet again, to break whatever atmosphere and try to get some information from Kevin's mouth, or to continue his ministrations and decipher the body language.
“Why?” The word came out faster, and Kibum went along with it.
Kevin didn't say a word more, rolling them both around and then kissing a trail down Kibum's body, just wishing Kibum would react the way he does.
Maybe then, he could tell himself that Kibum might have loved him the way he did.
But even as Kevin so desperately did all that he could to the other man, Kibum just didn't moan the same way he did.
Kibum frowned, watching Kevin slide down his body to his growing erection, then fondling gently with it, movements growing rapid. What was Kevin hiding, what was the something he couldn't get Kevin to tell him? The answer to the question he couldn’t reply to - what was it such that it brought out Kevin’s cowardly instincts to hide it with such habitual acts?
Kevin guided the other’s member past his lips, hollowing his cheeks as he sucked on Kibum’s leaking pre-cum. He let his fingers massage the base of the length, before scraping his teeth across the erection as he pulled out, then licking it from the very base to the top, twirling his tongue over the head.
Kibum jerked up and held the sides of Kevin's waist, before falling back down on the bed. While their positions didn’t change, Kevin was now facing Kibum’s face instead of his length due to the older man’s pull.
Kevin widened his eyes. Did he do something wrong?
“Yes?”
Kibum looked carefully at every facial feature of Kevin's for just one hint, whatever it might be. He wanted to find closure to the comment Kevin made, yet he couldn’t see anything from the younger’s eyes.
“I wanted to see what you look like when you do things to me.”
Kevin flinched subtly. Was Kibum mocking him? Or did Kibum want to see what he was able to see from Kevin's eyes, and maybe figure out what Kevin was trying to see? Whatever it was, Kevin blinked quickly, hoping to erase whatever his eyes could betray.
The thought of sex, or pleasing each other, ironically faded away from their minds and conditioned limbs.
The night ended with two confused souls, each trying to read the other's mind.
-
Kibum fell back onto his bed, eyes closed despite the many thoughts going round his head.
What was Kevin so afraid to tell him? What did he want to see, really?
And Kibum felt so irritated. How was it possible that there were things he wasn’t picking out? Or was it because he loved Kevin, restricting himself to see all that he could have seen?
That was the reason why people said that love made the smartest people silly. Kibum didn’t think it was possible, until it happened to him. Then again, even when it did, he still didn’t think it was happening. Wasn’t this the most dangerous situation? A fool not knowing his follies.
There was also that unsolved mystery about who Kevin fell for. How was he ever going to figure that one out? There are so many people in the world, though granted Kevin only knows this handful of people and one of them is-
…was it him?
Kibum opened his eyes, staring at the white ceiling in his room blankly. He sure hadn’t really considered himself as a candidate. He had so unconsciously pushed himself out to the side-lines as if he was a third party. Granted, it was because of his training as a psychology student, but because he was actively participating in this project, he couldn’t exactly be called a bystander. Then, what could explain the fear he constantly sees?
…it must be someone else then?
Well, to use simple mathematics, the probability of it being someone else is at the least 0.99, with all other factors included. The universe is so huge, surely Kibum wasn't pitting himself against hundreds of people who knew Kevin, was he?
Maybe, Kevin was afraid that the act of them pleasing each other was somewhat betraying the man he loved. Maybe, Kevin couldn’t bring himself to say “I think I’m done with this business.”.
Kibum sighed. There was something wrong with this conclusion, and he knew just from his intuition. And that’s the worst part, because intuition alone cannot form the analysis he’s dying to know.
-
The familiar pile of clothes, the familiar mess of limbs. The dimmed lights, the humid air.
Kevin tried catching his breath, unconsciously letting out a soft smile.
“You have an appointment after this, yeah?” Kibum asked as he stood up after their sex, heading towards his jeans. Reaching for his wallet, he took out the pre-calculated amount stashed inside it and held it out to Kevin, who was gathering his clothes after steadying his breathing.
The sudden appearance of money alerted Kevin. He then brought his arms before him as if suddenly self-conscious, hesitating. No, Kevin told himself. Kibum went down on him again and there was no reason he was to be paid for what Kibum did. He looked down, as if afraid of Kibum’s reaction, and shook his head slowly, timidly. “Keep the money.”
Even his voice wavered.
Kibum frowned. There was no reason why Kevin would, no, should reject the money.
“What's wrong?” Kibum asked, and Kevin was afraid that gentle tone would crumble him down. Kibum then took a step forward closer unconsciously, to which Kevin jerked backwards at, keeping the distance between them. Confused, the older man looked at the money in his hands again, and then at the other. This fear, again. “Kevin?”
Kevin gave a quick, shaky smile, before looking back down at the floor. “Next time, if you were the one doing all those things, let's waiver the fee.”
Kibum took intimidating steps closer, ignoring how Kevin almost ran out of the room naked as his hands caught the younger firmly. He pulled Kevin towards him and pinned him to the nearest wall, hands then cupping the younger's head to face him.
“What are you talking about? You need this money for your planned future.” Kibum smiled, ruffling Kevin's hair and then handing out the money again. His words so gentle, his touch so alluring, but his words. “Here.”
So hurtful.
“I'll-I'll feel guilty, okay?” Kevin clenched his fists, trying to keep down his unfounded anger. “You were doing everything and I get paid for it, I-I don't like it.”
Kibum nodded, biting his lips as he thought of the proposition. “All right. Take ninety percent then, since what you really get is ten percent. Is that okay?
That was the best, wasn't it? There's no proper reason for Kevin to reject that idea, and so the younger limply nodded, taking the money from Kibum's hand and counting a tenth of it to return to Kibum.
If only he didn't tell the other what happens to the money, maybe he could return the full sum without this procedure.
As Kevin finished wearing his clothes in silence, he eyed the money in Kibum's hand for the last time.
“Bye.”
“See you later.” Kibum waved casually, fingers still wrapped around the money.
Exiting the room, Kevin walked towards the hotel's lift and wished Kibum kept the money safe. It’s the same currency every citizen has and the same notes as every other in the older’s wallet, but it’s not the same.
Unlike other people, Kevin had a price tag. He wasn't priceless; he was worth a damn pathetic amount of money.
And as long as his worth was with Kibum, it could comfort him a little. That at least what he's worth was held in the hands of the person he loved.
-
Is anyone still reading it here?
Fandom(s) : U-KISS
Pairing(s): KeMaru
Rating: NC-17
Genre: AU, Romance
Warnings: Awful!English
Author's Notes: My second NaNoWriMo, and a rather bold decision, if I might say :)! Hopefully doesn't contain too much inaccuracies, and if it does, please ignore it? >_>?
Prologue :: Chapter 1 :: Chapter 2 :: Chapter 3 :: Chapter 4 :: Chapter 5 :: Chapter 6 :: Chapter 7
Chapter 8 :: Chapter 9 :: Chapter 10 :: Chapter 11 :: Chapter 12 :: Chapter 13 :: Chapter 14 :: Chapter 15
Chapter 16 :: Chapter 17 :: Chapter 18 :: Chapter 19 :: Chapter 20 :: Chapter 21 :: Chapter 22
Chapter 23 :: Chapter 24 :: Chapter 25 :: Chapter 26 :: Chapter 27 :: Chapter 28 :: Chapter 29
Chapter 30 :: Chapter 31 :: Chapter 32 :: Chapter 33 :: Chapter 34
The sixth month started exactly eight hours ago, Kibum mused. Just thirty more days till…the end? There was barely anything left to do for his research, and in fact, the whole experience might even be too lengthy for a mere school report. Nevertheless, he stood by the black car he sort of owned, waiting to fetch Kevin to the partnered hotel.
Why?
Because he was becoming selfish.
He wanted to know.
There has been something different about Kevin since only a while ago, and listening to his recent drunken confession, it could only mean that Kevin had fallen in love with someone right before his very eyes. And this shouldn’t be how it all turns out. He should have known, but because he doesn’t, he wants to.
Kibum thought back to his life five months ago, when he had no idea what he wanted his six months long project to be about. He only had an inkling - it had to be impactful, and nothing else. All else were decided along the way without much thought and Kibum wasn’t sure if he should be proud that his unconscious mind managed to bring him so far.
What was the project about again? Oh, right.
Kibum paused as he reviewed his position once more. Sighing softly, he knew he had broken the unspoken rule that stated he should not intervene with his subject’s problems quite a few times. It wasn’t like him at all to offer his help, but then again, it wasn’t like him to fall in love.
Even worse, the younger had also intervened in his own world, easing the tension Kibum had with his father.
The project was a big failure in so many different ways, yet oddly enough, Kibum didn’t feel bad about it.
-
Kevin wrapped his arms around Kibum’s neck, fingers threading through the recently trimmed hair as both their lips met. Kibum then shifted slightly to bring Kevin’s weight closer towards himself, barely concentrating on the kiss Kevin was dominating. He smiled softly as Kevin gently stroked his ears, and slowly laid the younger on the bed.
Kevin watched himself from Kibum’s eyes as the older man pulled away, his own breathless self reflected in Kibum’s dark orbs. He could almost call his current look disgusting, but the soft gaze Kibum had just didn’t tell the same story.
The older man slid his hands from around Kevin’s waist up to his neck, leaning down again only to stop right when the tip of their noses touched. He chuckled lowly, slightly grazing past the younger’s lips to leave a soft kiss on Kevin’s neck. Fingers then dancing down the defined collarbone, Kibum started unbuttoning Kevin’s shirt.
It was a pure coincidence that Kevin was wearing a buttoned shirt, mirroring the time when they first met. He remembered the hesitant fingers that couldn’t do a thing and how it could never compare to the present Kibum, hands skilfully removing the shirt from Kevin’s torso.
His first impression of this man was that he was too stiff, too uptight. Kibum constantly wore this stoic expression and never made any noise during their sex, infuriating Kevin to no end. Sure, he was young and handsome, but he was still getting on Kevin’s nerves and hurting his pride with the dull response.
Kevin smiled softly as Kibum reached the last button, and wondered how long it has been since they first met. This man on top of him had a different atmosphere around him than the one before, and maybe that meant they both changed.
Both.
Because it felt like he was reborn from that moment on.
“Focus.” Kibum frowned slightly at the sight of Kevin’s gentle and almost distracted smile. He leaned down and watched Kevin’s eyes, barely showing the fact they were dazed for moment. “On me.”
The younger man raised his hand to up the other’s face, staring back into Kibum’s eyes. Was Kibum being jealous? Of himself?
Kevin wished he could tell of how he had been focusing this whole while on the man before him, and that Kevin’s world no longer revolves around himself. He was rotating round Kibum aimlessly, like a pawn piece sent to war without so much of a thought.
And there wasn’t any problem with it because he’ll submit himself anytime for a general like the other.
So it was kind of funny that Kibum would be jealous of himself, but Kevin couldn’t bring himself to share the joke. Because every other word waiting to slip out from his lips speaks of love for the other.
Kibum raised him up and tried to pull the shirt off Kevin’s arms, pausing when the sleeves hooked on.
“Well, if the shirt likes you so much, you can keep it on.” Kibum grinned, pressing a short kiss on Kevin’s forehead.
Kevin subtly frowned, only enough to test if the muscles on his forehead went numb from Kibum’s kiss. The lingering feeling can almost be called innocent, so why the hell did it turn him on?
Kibum held onto the younger’s waist gently, and then lowered himself to kiss the exposed collarbone, gradually heading south. Pausing in his motion as he felt Kevin fighting the shirt’s restraints, he teased the already hard nubs with a slight kiss purposely aimed way off.
The younger man groaned, though part of him knew he could easily slip the shirt’s sleeves off his forearms. Leaving his hands strengthless, he squirmed beneath Kibum, knee rubbing against the other’s covered length. Kibum then moved onto the other nub, tongue first wetting the spot, tickling, and then gently biting down.
“Kibum-ah...” Kevin moaned, hands hugging Kibum's head closer while his fingers intertwined with the tousled hair. “Ki-”
Kevin bit his lower lip, unable to resist Kibum’s path down his own body. He felt himself shudder from the sheer pleasure, every inch of his muscles tensing, convoluting under the other man. He wanted to fight his reflexes, to relax and reach euphoria the way Kibum always brought him to, but somehow his body got more and more sensitive.
The older man then held his waist more firmly as if knowing, blowing lightly against the erected length he had went south for.
Taking in the hard member slowly, Kibum forced Kevin’s hips back down as the younger tried to thrust right into Kibum’s mouth. He could say Kevin was different today, lacking all the self-control he had learnt through the years of selling sex. And Kibum doesn’t think he would mind it, seeing as Kevin would never let another man see him this way.
Smirking slightly, Kibum scraped his teeth against the heated skin of Kevin’s member.
Kevin writhed a lot more violently, hands jerking Kibum's head backwards to pull the older away from his throbbing member, and then towards him face to face. With his own questioning eyes almost blinded by the desperate lust his body was aching for, he saw the consciousness of Kibum’s mind from those deep eyes. The ones he could still remember from their first meeting, the ones that left an impression, the ones beckoning him.
As if trying to swallow every image, every scene, those eyes just kept drawing him closer towards the abyss called love.
If he falls, he loses.
And he has already fallen, he has already lost himself.
Kibum laid on top of the younger, watching the other to grasp the momentum. He paused, concentrating on the rise and fall of Kevin’s chest following his every breath, himself almost unconsciously trying to match the other’s rhythm. The two then breathed in silence for a brief moment, as Kevin searching for hints of love in those eyes. And he felt like he needed to explain himself, to ensure Kibum there wasn’t anything weird.
“I wanted to see...what you look like when you do things to me.” Kevin said shakily, praying Kibum didn't understand.
He only realised too late. That any actions he did or any excuses he made are always so easily seen through by the other.
Kibum frowned slightly, but not enough under the low light for Kevin to see. He wanted to ask why. Why Kevin would ask such a thing was beyond him, afterall. It wasn’t like Kevin, it wasn’t the words he expected to hear from Kevin - his research subject for five months now. He should have understood this man like the back of his hand, but keeps getting confused over the unexpected situations presented before him.
He had a crossroad yet again, to break whatever atmosphere and try to get some information from Kevin's mouth, or to continue his ministrations and decipher the body language.
“Why?” The word came out faster, and Kibum went along with it.
Kevin didn't say a word more, rolling them both around and then kissing a trail down Kibum's body, just wishing Kibum would react the way he does.
Maybe then, he could tell himself that Kibum might have loved him the way he did.
But even as Kevin so desperately did all that he could to the other man, Kibum just didn't moan the same way he did.
Kibum frowned, watching Kevin slide down his body to his growing erection, then fondling gently with it, movements growing rapid. What was Kevin hiding, what was the something he couldn't get Kevin to tell him? The answer to the question he couldn’t reply to - what was it such that it brought out Kevin’s cowardly instincts to hide it with such habitual acts?
Kevin guided the other’s member past his lips, hollowing his cheeks as he sucked on Kibum’s leaking pre-cum. He let his fingers massage the base of the length, before scraping his teeth across the erection as he pulled out, then licking it from the very base to the top, twirling his tongue over the head.
Kibum jerked up and held the sides of Kevin's waist, before falling back down on the bed. While their positions didn’t change, Kevin was now facing Kibum’s face instead of his length due to the older man’s pull.
Kevin widened his eyes. Did he do something wrong?
“Yes?”
Kibum looked carefully at every facial feature of Kevin's for just one hint, whatever it might be. He wanted to find closure to the comment Kevin made, yet he couldn’t see anything from the younger’s eyes.
“I wanted to see what you look like when you do things to me.”
Kevin flinched subtly. Was Kibum mocking him? Or did Kibum want to see what he was able to see from Kevin's eyes, and maybe figure out what Kevin was trying to see? Whatever it was, Kevin blinked quickly, hoping to erase whatever his eyes could betray.
The thought of sex, or pleasing each other, ironically faded away from their minds and conditioned limbs.
The night ended with two confused souls, each trying to read the other's mind.
-
Kibum fell back onto his bed, eyes closed despite the many thoughts going round his head.
What was Kevin so afraid to tell him? What did he want to see, really?
And Kibum felt so irritated. How was it possible that there were things he wasn’t picking out? Or was it because he loved Kevin, restricting himself to see all that he could have seen?
That was the reason why people said that love made the smartest people silly. Kibum didn’t think it was possible, until it happened to him. Then again, even when it did, he still didn’t think it was happening. Wasn’t this the most dangerous situation? A fool not knowing his follies.
There was also that unsolved mystery about who Kevin fell for. How was he ever going to figure that one out? There are so many people in the world, though granted Kevin only knows this handful of people and one of them is-
…was it him?
Kibum opened his eyes, staring at the white ceiling in his room blankly. He sure hadn’t really considered himself as a candidate. He had so unconsciously pushed himself out to the side-lines as if he was a third party. Granted, it was because of his training as a psychology student, but because he was actively participating in this project, he couldn’t exactly be called a bystander. Then, what could explain the fear he constantly sees?
…it must be someone else then?
Well, to use simple mathematics, the probability of it being someone else is at the least 0.99, with all other factors included. The universe is so huge, surely Kibum wasn't pitting himself against hundreds of people who knew Kevin, was he?
Maybe, Kevin was afraid that the act of them pleasing each other was somewhat betraying the man he loved. Maybe, Kevin couldn’t bring himself to say “I think I’m done with this business.”.
Kibum sighed. There was something wrong with this conclusion, and he knew just from his intuition. And that’s the worst part, because intuition alone cannot form the analysis he’s dying to know.
-
The familiar pile of clothes, the familiar mess of limbs. The dimmed lights, the humid air.
Kevin tried catching his breath, unconsciously letting out a soft smile.
“You have an appointment after this, yeah?” Kibum asked as he stood up after their sex, heading towards his jeans. Reaching for his wallet, he took out the pre-calculated amount stashed inside it and held it out to Kevin, who was gathering his clothes after steadying his breathing.
The sudden appearance of money alerted Kevin. He then brought his arms before him as if suddenly self-conscious, hesitating. No, Kevin told himself. Kibum went down on him again and there was no reason he was to be paid for what Kibum did. He looked down, as if afraid of Kibum’s reaction, and shook his head slowly, timidly. “Keep the money.”
Even his voice wavered.
Kibum frowned. There was no reason why Kevin would, no, should reject the money.
“What's wrong?” Kibum asked, and Kevin was afraid that gentle tone would crumble him down. Kibum then took a step forward closer unconsciously, to which Kevin jerked backwards at, keeping the distance between them. Confused, the older man looked at the money in his hands again, and then at the other. This fear, again. “Kevin?”
Kevin gave a quick, shaky smile, before looking back down at the floor. “Next time, if you were the one doing all those things, let's waiver the fee.”
Kibum took intimidating steps closer, ignoring how Kevin almost ran out of the room naked as his hands caught the younger firmly. He pulled Kevin towards him and pinned him to the nearest wall, hands then cupping the younger's head to face him.
“What are you talking about? You need this money for your planned future.” Kibum smiled, ruffling Kevin's hair and then handing out the money again. His words so gentle, his touch so alluring, but his words. “Here.”
So hurtful.
“I'll-I'll feel guilty, okay?” Kevin clenched his fists, trying to keep down his unfounded anger. “You were doing everything and I get paid for it, I-I don't like it.”
Kibum nodded, biting his lips as he thought of the proposition. “All right. Take ninety percent then, since what you really get is ten percent. Is that okay?
That was the best, wasn't it? There's no proper reason for Kevin to reject that idea, and so the younger limply nodded, taking the money from Kibum's hand and counting a tenth of it to return to Kibum.
If only he didn't tell the other what happens to the money, maybe he could return the full sum without this procedure.
As Kevin finished wearing his clothes in silence, he eyed the money in Kibum's hand for the last time.
“Bye.”
“See you later.” Kibum waved casually, fingers still wrapped around the money.
Exiting the room, Kevin walked towards the hotel's lift and wished Kibum kept the money safe. It’s the same currency every citizen has and the same notes as every other in the older’s wallet, but it’s not the same.
Unlike other people, Kevin had a price tag. He wasn't priceless; he was worth a damn pathetic amount of money.
And as long as his worth was with Kibum, it could comfort him a little. That at least what he's worth was held in the hands of the person he loved.
-
Is anyone still reading it here?