Why I hate New Years
1. I feel like a prisoner in my own home because I dont want to risk getting hit by a drunk driver or worse a crazed soccer mom who just got done taking back all her christmas returns. I mean really, the headline would read, "Female Midshipman dies by Minivan."
2. You build up the whole week telling yourself this New Year's is going to be different, only to meet the same old disappointment of being alone and pissy at 12:01.
3. Even if you attempt to avoid the disappointment, other people who are disappointed with the year or the holiday seem to infect you.
4. You feel like a total loser when you dont have anyone to kiss at 1200.
5. New Years Resolutions just make you feel either silly, guilty, or poor. Or a combination of all three.
6. By 1230 your loser feelings have changed to foolish feelings because you feel like a fool hoping for the Romance of the century on a single night, at a single moment.
7. The following day, nicknamed National Hangover Day, is plauged with absolutly horrible television.
8. Not here in Texas, but usually if you live closer to any celebrating city, the fireworks manage to wake you up even if you do manage to call it an early night. No matter what you won't be sleeping well.
9. Each year, you are reminded that you have accomplished nothing once again.
10. Even if you wanted to fit into your special New Year's Eve dress, with all the Christmas cakes and turkeys in the holiday season from Halloween on you've got a fat chance of fitting in that dress, and dont be afraid... because Jenny Craig, Nutrisystem, Weight Watchers and the whole lot will have you regretting every once of fat by 8pm Jan 2.
2. You build up the whole week telling yourself this New Year's is going to be different, only to meet the same old disappointment of being alone and pissy at 12:01.
3. Even if you attempt to avoid the disappointment, other people who are disappointed with the year or the holiday seem to infect you.
4. You feel like a total loser when you dont have anyone to kiss at 1200.
5. New Years Resolutions just make you feel either silly, guilty, or poor. Or a combination of all three.
6. By 1230 your loser feelings have changed to foolish feelings because you feel like a fool hoping for the Romance of the century on a single night, at a single moment.
7. The following day, nicknamed National Hangover Day, is plauged with absolutly horrible television.
8. Not here in Texas, but usually if you live closer to any celebrating city, the fireworks manage to wake you up even if you do manage to call it an early night. No matter what you won't be sleeping well.
9. Each year, you are reminded that you have accomplished nothing once again.
10. Even if you wanted to fit into your special New Year's Eve dress, with all the Christmas cakes and turkeys in the holiday season from Halloween on you've got a fat chance of fitting in that dress, and dont be afraid... because Jenny Craig, Nutrisystem, Weight Watchers and the whole lot will have you regretting every once of fat by 8pm Jan 2.