(no subject)
I'm having a little get together at my place tomorrow for my birthday party/JET acceptance celebration. Some friends of mine are coming in town. I don't feel much in the party mood right now.
Part of it is being tired. Most of it is my bad luck with my own parties, as Kevin reminded me.
Kevin and I were in the car today and he asked what I was doing for the party. I mentioned the activities (mostly games, poker, and watching Robot Chicken, which Yoko got for me) and he seemed really critical of every single one. "Only a few people are probably going to play poker." "I can only watch so much Robot Chicken." "Are we gonna play games all night just like at your party where you killed Guilty Gear?"
The Guilty Gear one in particular cut me deep. My nineteenth birthday party has haunted me for years, so it took me a while to psyche myself up for this party. It's gotta be pretty bad if you have to psyche yourself up for you own freakin' party. I finally got myself into it by saying that I'll have a really nice party if I get accepted to JET. I'll invite my friends from out of town and get some drinks and have a gay old time. That's what I told myself. I was still wary of the idea, but I worked myself into it. I was kind of excited until this afternoon.
The guys told me the other day they were planning to come on saturday. They said they'd come in early, which means they'd be here after at least three (that's how these things just end up). When I go to Gainesville, I spend a while there. I kinda felt bad they'd be coming in and then leaving the next day. To be honest, I felt kind of cheated. I talked them into leaving after Josh's Cuong Nhu class, which means they'll be here late tonight, but I'll get more time with them. It's my party, I'm allowed to be selfish, right?
Anyway, now that I'm in this mood and it's come down to it, I'm really worried about the guys saying they won't come tonight. I would be tempted to cancel the party, I swear. I'd give into my party curse and just use the weekend for homework or something.
Part of it is being tired. Most of it is my bad luck with my own parties, as Kevin reminded me.
Kevin and I were in the car today and he asked what I was doing for the party. I mentioned the activities (mostly games, poker, and watching Robot Chicken, which Yoko got for me) and he seemed really critical of every single one. "Only a few people are probably going to play poker." "I can only watch so much Robot Chicken." "Are we gonna play games all night just like at your party where you killed Guilty Gear?"
The Guilty Gear one in particular cut me deep. My nineteenth birthday party has haunted me for years, so it took me a while to psyche myself up for this party. It's gotta be pretty bad if you have to psyche yourself up for you own freakin' party. I finally got myself into it by saying that I'll have a really nice party if I get accepted to JET. I'll invite my friends from out of town and get some drinks and have a gay old time. That's what I told myself. I was still wary of the idea, but I worked myself into it. I was kind of excited until this afternoon.
The guys told me the other day they were planning to come on saturday. They said they'd come in early, which means they'd be here after at least three (that's how these things just end up). When I go to Gainesville, I spend a while there. I kinda felt bad they'd be coming in and then leaving the next day. To be honest, I felt kind of cheated. I talked them into leaving after Josh's Cuong Nhu class, which means they'll be here late tonight, but I'll get more time with them. It's my party, I'm allowed to be selfish, right?
Anyway, now that I'm in this mood and it's come down to it, I'm really worried about the guys saying they won't come tonight. I would be tempted to cancel the party, I swear. I'd give into my party curse and just use the weekend for homework or something.