Guess we both know we're in over our heads
Happy August! I mean it. I have petitioned the universe to be kinder to my friends and I'm putting my tiny foot down on the matter. I'm choosing to believe my own feelings of impending doom are entirely chemical or work-related and have nothing to do with any pesky metaphorical gypsies or the fact that we're headed into hurricane season. :) [ETA: Or BRIDGE COLLAPSE SEASON?! CRAP.]
Speaking of watery disasters, I'm relieved to see the floodwaters in England starting to recede, though cleanup has just begun.
Jon Stewart: John, by some accounts, this is the worst flooding in British history. How has the government reacted to the crisis?
John Oliver: (while "clinging" to the minute hand of "Big Ben") Well, the way any self-respecting Western democracy would respond to a water-based calamity: they provided security for affected areas, they distributed bottled water, and shelters were immediately opened to keep all residents safe. Even the black people!
(...)
Jon: This actually sounds like an impressive rescue and relief effort by the government.
John: It's not rocket science, Jon, just basic humanity and competence. What did you expect them to do, shamefully abandon an entire region?
It came off funnier onscreen than it does in quotes, I think. Still, more on the nose than usual, even for TDS.
And, as it's an issue after my own heart, I haven't been so entertained since alt!Daniel Jackson tried to teach ESL: John Oliver, in response to a bill being introduced by Senator James Inhoff to make English the official (and only) language of the United States, goes to teach an ESL class the Most Important Phrases [They] Will Ever Need to Know.
HELP, MR. NATIONAL GUARDSMAN! MY CITY IS FLOODED AND I AM DROWNING DUE TO POORLY DESIGNED LEVEES AND A WOEFULLY INSUFFICIENT FEDERAL DISASTER PLAN!
PLEASE DON'T EXPLAIN THIS BALLOT TO ME, IT'S THE ONLY WAY I'M GOING TO LEARN.
OFFICER, FOR THE LAST TIME, I'M NOT A TERRORIST.
NURSE, THERE'S A CHANCE I HAVE AN ACTION FIGURE IN MY RECTUM. IT'S JUST I TRIPPED AND FELL, AND -- WELL.
By rote, of course. With gestures!
Speaking of watery disasters, I'm relieved to see the floodwaters in England starting to recede, though cleanup has just begun.
Jon Stewart: John, by some accounts, this is the worst flooding in British history. How has the government reacted to the crisis?
John Oliver: (while "clinging" to the minute hand of "Big Ben") Well, the way any self-respecting Western democracy would respond to a water-based calamity: they provided security for affected areas, they distributed bottled water, and shelters were immediately opened to keep all residents safe. Even the black people!
(...)
Jon: This actually sounds like an impressive rescue and relief effort by the government.
John: It's not rocket science, Jon, just basic humanity and competence. What did you expect them to do, shamefully abandon an entire region?
It came off funnier onscreen than it does in quotes, I think. Still, more on the nose than usual, even for TDS.
And, as it's an issue after my own heart, I haven't been so entertained since alt!Daniel Jackson tried to teach ESL: John Oliver, in response to a bill being introduced by Senator James Inhoff to make English the official (and only) language of the United States, goes to teach an ESL class the Most Important Phrases [They] Will Ever Need to Know.
HELP, MR. NATIONAL GUARDSMAN! MY CITY IS FLOODED AND I AM DROWNING DUE TO POORLY DESIGNED LEVEES AND A WOEFULLY INSUFFICIENT FEDERAL DISASTER PLAN!
PLEASE DON'T EXPLAIN THIS BALLOT TO ME, IT'S THE ONLY WAY I'M GOING TO LEARN.
OFFICER, FOR THE LAST TIME, I'M NOT A TERRORIST.
NURSE, THERE'S A CHANCE I HAVE AN ACTION FIGURE IN MY RECTUM. IT'S JUST I TRIPPED AND FELL, AND -- WELL.
By rote, of course. With gestures!