(no subject)
My cousins funeral is back on for this Sunday. I didn't ask for details of what is going down, just said I would pick up my niece the night before and drop her off at my parents, and then we would all carpool together on Saturday. B gave me attitude about picking up my niece and before I could loose my shit I think he realized that it wasn't cool and backed off. It's like hello I know it's a long drive to get her, like two freaking hours each way. BUT she doesn't have a car, her dad's a fucking dickwad who doesn't have anything to do with his own kid anymore, and she deserves to be there to grieve with the rest of us. She called me last night and we had a really long talk about all the shit that has been going on and I think it would be really good for her to be there.
Then today my brother who is the alcoholic on parole waiting for his court date on Monday texted me. He is all upset and broken up about my cousin's death. My cousin was calling him every day and even drove the five hours to see him one day. My brother sounded really depressed, because he said he has no food, no money, and he's just waiting to go back to jail. I didn't know what to say. Sorry you fucked up your life so bad and I told you to stop drinking and get help, but you refused to? Instead I just told him it sucks that they don't give you bus pass to get to the court house. I really felt like saying where are all these supposed friends? After a few texts he stopped texting me and didn't answer me. Part of me was a bit worried, but the other part of me is honestly just so over everything. I can't live my life worrying about an adult who is in an out of jail and prison and who is an alcoholic who refuses to get help. It's not my job.
Then today my brother who is the alcoholic on parole waiting for his court date on Monday texted me. He is all upset and broken up about my cousin's death. My cousin was calling him every day and even drove the five hours to see him one day. My brother sounded really depressed, because he said he has no food, no money, and he's just waiting to go back to jail. I didn't know what to say. Sorry you fucked up your life so bad and I told you to stop drinking and get help, but you refused to? Instead I just told him it sucks that they don't give you bus pass to get to the court house. I really felt like saying where are all these supposed friends? After a few texts he stopped texting me and didn't answer me. Part of me was a bit worried, but the other part of me is honestly just so over everything. I can't live my life worrying about an adult who is in an out of jail and prison and who is an alcoholic who refuses to get help. It's not my job.