{声 voice post 声}

[ruininurworld]

[CLANGCLANG, a phone banging against a desk, the cord whipping behind it]

-HONE CALL? ONE PHONE CAAAAALL? AHHH, I DON'T DESERVE EVEN HALF A PHONE CALL! ALL MY ROAMING MINUTES SHOULD BE PUT OVER A SPIT AND ROOOOASTED!
I AM A FELON!
A CROOK!
WHAT THE MOTHERS OF FELONS AND CROOKS WARN THEIR CHILDREN ABOUT!
I AM PURE EVIIIIIL!

DON'T YOU SEE?! DON

Comments

[bastaaaaard]

I admit confusion.

[ruininurworld]

I ADMIT MY UNWORTHINESS TO LIIIIIVE!!

[bastaaaaard]

I

Pardon?

[ruininurworld]

TH-THERE IS NO PARDONING THE GROTESQUE BEAST OF A PERSON THAT I AM! I WILL NEVER BE ABSOLVED OF MY FAILURES AND SHAAAAAME!! UWWAAAAAAHHH!!

[bastaaaaard]

Asking you to speak in reason will be impossible, won't it?

[ruininurworld]

I'M S-S-SORRY, PLEASE, YOU D-D-DO NOT HAVE TO SPEAK TO ME, IT ISN'T EVEN VISITING HOURS, OH DEAR, OH DEAR! I CAN'T EVEN BE A PRISONER CORRECTLY! I WANT TO G-G-G-G-GO HOME!

[bastaaaaard]

I doubt your crime was serious in any matter. You don't seem the type.

[ruininurworld]

I KNOW I AM USELESS AT EVERYTHING I TRY TO DO, BUT THIS WORTHLESSNESS IS WHAT MAKES UP MY EVIL CRIMINAL MENTALITY! DO NOT BE FOOLED! YOU SHOULDN'T TALK TO ME! WHAT IF I F-F-FIND OUT WHERE YOU LIVE AND T-T-TRY TO PUNCH YOUR FACE!

[bastaaaaard]

It certainly wouldn't be the first time someone's appeared out of nowhere and hit me.

[ruininurworld]

I'M S-S-S-SORRY! I'M SORRY! PLEASE HIT ME BACK IF I DO! VERY H-HARD!

[bastaaaaard]

I would never.

[ruininurworld]

Why n-n-n-not?

[bastaaaaard]

I would never strike a lady.

Or do I really seem that much the type?

[ruininurworld]

O-oh.

N-n-n-no! Not a-at, at all. I did not m-mean to imply you w-w-were, I'm so sorry!