{声 voice post 声}
[CLANGCLANG, a phone banging against a desk, the cord whipping behind it]
-HONE CALL? ONE PHONE CAAAAALL? AHHH, I DON'T DESERVE EVEN HALF A PHONE CALL! ALL MY ROAMING MINUTES SHOULD BE PUT OVER A SPIT AND ROOOOASTED!
I AM A FELON!
A CROOK!
WHAT THE MOTHERS OF FELONS AND CROOKS WARN THEIR CHILDREN ABOUT!
I AM PURE EVIIIIIL!
DON'T YOU SEE?! DON'T YOU SEE, OFFICER-SANS!? I AM BEYOND REDEMPTION! THERE IS NOTHING MORE TO ME THAN THE FESTERING PIT OF SIN YOU SEE BEFORE YOU! I WILL EMBRACE THIS LIFE THAT I WAS DESTINED FROM THE CRADLE TO LEAD! A LIFE BEHIND BARS! I WILL GET CORNROWS AND PRISON T-T-TATS AND S-S-SAY BAD WORDS! THAT'S RIGHT! YOU P-P-POOTHEADS!
[voices in the background, movement]
AAAAHHH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!??! I DIDN'T MEAN IT! I'M SO SORRY!! OH, I SEE! I AM SORRY FOR RESISTING YOU! I'M SOOOOOOORYYYYY! FEEL FREE TO TREAT ME HARSHLY AND UNJUSTLY!! POLICE BRUTALITY MAY BE ILLEGAL BUT FOR A DISGUSTING TWO-FACED SWINE LIKE ME, THERE IS HARDLY ANY OTHER OPTION IF YOU WISH TO KEEP YOUR LIVES! I CAN WAIT HERE IF YOU NEED TO RETRIEVE YOUR NIGHT STICKS!!
THIS IS MY CELL?! B-B-BUT...! I CAN STAND UP IN IT!! PLEASE, PUT ME IN A 20X20 CHAINED BOXED WITH AIRHOLES! I DO NOT MERIT THIS GRACIOUS TREATMENT! OR AT THE VERY LEAST, ALLOW MY CELLMATE TO CARVE A SHIV OUT OF HIS LUNCH SPOON AND LOOK THE OTHER WAY WHILE HE STABS ME TO DEATH IN MY SLEEP!
H-H-HELLO? HELLOOOOOO?? WHERE ARE YOU G-G-GOOOOING!!
[dial tone]
-HONE CALL? ONE PHONE CAAAAALL? AHHH, I DON'T DESERVE EVEN HALF A PHONE CALL! ALL MY ROAMING MINUTES SHOULD BE PUT OVER A SPIT AND ROOOOASTED!
I AM A FELON!
A CROOK!
WHAT THE MOTHERS OF FELONS AND CROOKS WARN THEIR CHILDREN ABOUT!
I AM PURE EVIIIIIL!
DON'T YOU SEE?! DON'T YOU SEE, OFFICER-SANS!? I AM BEYOND REDEMPTION! THERE IS NOTHING MORE TO ME THAN THE FESTERING PIT OF SIN YOU SEE BEFORE YOU! I WILL EMBRACE THIS LIFE THAT I WAS DESTINED FROM THE CRADLE TO LEAD! A LIFE BEHIND BARS! I WILL GET CORNROWS AND PRISON T-T-TATS AND S-S-SAY BAD WORDS! THAT'S RIGHT! YOU P-P-POOTHEADS!
[voices in the background, movement]
AAAAHHH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!??! I DIDN'T MEAN IT! I'M SO SORRY!! OH, I SEE! I AM SORRY FOR RESISTING YOU! I'M SOOOOOOORYYYYY! FEEL FREE TO TREAT ME HARSHLY AND UNJUSTLY!! POLICE BRUTALITY MAY BE ILLEGAL BUT FOR A DISGUSTING TWO-FACED SWINE LIKE ME, THERE IS HARDLY ANY OTHER OPTION IF YOU WISH TO KEEP YOUR LIVES! I CAN WAIT HERE IF YOU NEED TO RETRIEVE YOUR NIGHT STICKS!!
THIS IS MY CELL?! B-B-BUT...! I CAN STAND UP IN IT!! PLEASE, PUT ME IN A 20X20 CHAINED BOXED WITH AIRHOLES! I DO NOT MERIT THIS GRACIOUS TREATMENT! OR AT THE VERY LEAST, ALLOW MY CELLMATE TO CARVE A SHIV OUT OF HIS LUNCH SPOON AND LOOK THE OTHER WAY WHILE HE STABS ME TO DEATH IN MY SLEEP!
H-H-HELLO? HELLOOOOOO?? WHERE ARE YOU G-G-GOOOOING!!
[dial tone]