(no subject)
i had a nightmare this morning that my wedding went all wrong. we were late for our hair appointments and they came out like shit because the girls didnt know what they were doing. i ended up taking over the curling iron after some girl made my friend look like a poofy mess. my hair was really short but some how i ended up looking like a soccer mom.
at the wedding everything was rushed. we didnt get to say vows and the food was terrible. and i guess we had to rush on the dresses too because i didnt have a wedding dress and me and all the bridesmaids were dressed in this horrible frumpy blue fabric that looked like curtains. i think thats when i started to cry. when i realized that i never wanted a fancy wedding but if i was going to do it, i wanted to make it somewhat nice and this was HORRIBLE.
and then, thankfully, i woke up. i realize now that john wasnt even in the dream which makes me wonder what this dream is really saying about me.
people keep asking me if weve set a date. i kinda wish we have but im thinking about going back to school. i need to figure out how that will effect my finacial aid before i start planning something. but its not like we have money for a wedding anyone and no one has stepped up to bat to help us. except my parents. who cant afford anything. how ironic is that. which means really, im not going to let them pay for anything if i can help it.
so now this morning im feeling meloncholy and weird. i need to go shake it off.
at the wedding everything was rushed. we didnt get to say vows and the food was terrible. and i guess we had to rush on the dresses too because i didnt have a wedding dress and me and all the bridesmaids were dressed in this horrible frumpy blue fabric that looked like curtains. i think thats when i started to cry. when i realized that i never wanted a fancy wedding but if i was going to do it, i wanted to make it somewhat nice and this was HORRIBLE.
and then, thankfully, i woke up. i realize now that john wasnt even in the dream which makes me wonder what this dream is really saying about me.
people keep asking me if weve set a date. i kinda wish we have but im thinking about going back to school. i need to figure out how that will effect my finacial aid before i start planning something. but its not like we have money for a wedding anyone and no one has stepped up to bat to help us. except my parents. who cant afford anything. how ironic is that. which means really, im not going to let them pay for anything if i can help it.
so now this morning im feeling meloncholy and weird. i need to go shake it off.