Boredom and the pussy cat doll
The eye hasn't been kind to me for the whole of this week. Let's see, we start off with a huge eye irritation last saturday morning, i dashed to the campus clinic an hour before it closes, the eye is appeased for awhile but with instructions to go to the hospital if it acts up again over the weekend.
So the next day, the eye flares up. How timely. I had to be rushed to the hospital A&E at 1.30am with a fellow singaporean because no one else was free to accompany semi-blind me simply because they were too fucked up tired. I mean like, what the fuck? are u goddamn blind? the devil ate your eyes or what? I was standing there with 1 eye looking like someone stabbed it with a knife. Not to mention the fact that i was clearly in pain, you goddamn mutherfuckers. Anyways.
Lying in bed with nothing to do, makes you think many things. Lying in bed for more than 18 hours a day engulfed in darkness makes you hallucinate many things too. I shouldn't dwelve into the wierdest dream about stuffing 4 sausages into my pussy while the security guards at my Hall looked on. But you get the idea. I was bored out of my mind. In between waking up for eye drips, fumbling my way to the toilet and shielding my eyes from the light of a camera (i don't mean the flash. u know the orange warning spot that flashes for 1 second?) i thought about life and death. About love and sex and how empty life would be without porn.
You guys would prolly know about the time i almost lost my life in Mexico from a bike haul. And boy was it a loooong haul eh? When JJ saw me on webcam, crying in pain and self-pity, i heard his sorrow in his voice. <3. Nope i wasn't looking - both eyes were shut tight to minimise movement between the cornea and the eyelid. He mentioned something about making a collection of accident photos gathered from overseas: neck brace, eye patch etc. When we can control our body, we cannot control what external factors dictates us. Who in a cow's ass knows that a road hump can be so deadly? Much less a pair of RGP lenses. When i was almost certain i was gonna be paralysed then, i thought i was going blind in one eye.
The review today was almost positive if not for the fact that my newly formed cornea shell is still loose and could tear again any moment between now and til it tightens. Time frame check? "In a few days, few weeks, or few months." Thank you Doc, that was extremely comforting.
But he cleared me for the flight to SF though. ^^
I'm really just forcing myself to lie in bed, as much as i can, with both eyes shut of course. I.E. nothing to do. Boredom sucks. But Boredom is useful. Because Boredom makes you realise what an invalid you can be. And Boredom can make you kill people in your head simply because while you're trying to meditate the pain away from your mind, the people living on your floor love slamming doors. Fuck y'all alright.
But sometimes, Boredom makes you more aware of what you want. Or rather, what your body wants. If it's not hunger, it's sleep. If not, it's sex. For the countless hours i spent in bed, i swear i never once craved for shopping, music, clubbing, TV, cooking or even a shower. I laid in bed til the bed smelt of me, my perverse mind and the countless eye drops i had. Quite a cheebye combination actually because none make me feel better. The tummy however, gets satisfied from time to time whenever my lovely roomate preps me piping hot stuff and i sleep whenever i -- feel like sleeping. The eyes are closed already ANYWAY. I'd take it in my stride for now: pussy, perverse mind and fucking on the couch in sub-10 temperatures shall have to wait. haha.
Peace.
So the next day, the eye flares up. How timely. I had to be rushed to the hospital A&E at 1.30am with a fellow singaporean because no one else was free to accompany semi-blind me simply because they were too fucked up tired. I mean like, what the fuck? are u goddamn blind? the devil ate your eyes or what? I was standing there with 1 eye looking like someone stabbed it with a knife. Not to mention the fact that i was clearly in pain, you goddamn mutherfuckers. Anyways.
Lying in bed with nothing to do, makes you think many things. Lying in bed for more than 18 hours a day engulfed in darkness makes you hallucinate many things too. I shouldn't dwelve into the wierdest dream about stuffing 4 sausages into my pussy while the security guards at my Hall looked on. But you get the idea. I was bored out of my mind. In between waking up for eye drips, fumbling my way to the toilet and shielding my eyes from the light of a camera (i don't mean the flash. u know the orange warning spot that flashes for 1 second?) i thought about life and death. About love and sex and how empty life would be without porn.
You guys would prolly know about the time i almost lost my life in Mexico from a bike haul. And boy was it a loooong haul eh? When JJ saw me on webcam, crying in pain and self-pity, i heard his sorrow in his voice. <3. Nope i wasn't looking - both eyes were shut tight to minimise movement between the cornea and the eyelid. He mentioned something about making a collection of accident photos gathered from overseas: neck brace, eye patch etc. When we can control our body, we cannot control what external factors dictates us. Who in a cow's ass knows that a road hump can be so deadly? Much less a pair of RGP lenses. When i was almost certain i was gonna be paralysed then, i thought i was going blind in one eye.
The review today was almost positive if not for the fact that my newly formed cornea shell is still loose and could tear again any moment between now and til it tightens. Time frame check? "In a few days, few weeks, or few months." Thank you Doc, that was extremely comforting.
But he cleared me for the flight to SF though. ^^
I'm really just forcing myself to lie in bed, as much as i can, with both eyes shut of course. I.E. nothing to do. Boredom sucks. But Boredom is useful. Because Boredom makes you realise what an invalid you can be. And Boredom can make you kill people in your head simply because while you're trying to meditate the pain away from your mind, the people living on your floor love slamming doors. Fuck y'all alright.
But sometimes, Boredom makes you more aware of what you want. Or rather, what your body wants. If it's not hunger, it's sleep. If not, it's sex. For the countless hours i spent in bed, i swear i never once craved for shopping, music, clubbing, TV, cooking or even a shower. I laid in bed til the bed smelt of me, my perverse mind and the countless eye drops i had. Quite a cheebye combination actually because none make me feel better. The tummy however, gets satisfied from time to time whenever my lovely roomate preps me piping hot stuff and i sleep whenever i -- feel like sleeping. The eyes are closed already ANYWAY. I'd take it in my stride for now: pussy, perverse mind and fucking on the couch in sub-10 temperatures shall have to wait. haha.
Peace.