Release
Title: Release
Author: phoenixfyre13
Format/Word Count: Oneshot angst, about 1,400
Rating: PG-13 for safety, adult themes (i.e., death)
Prompt: Prompt 23, release
Warning: Character death(s)
Summary: The things one considers when staring into the face of death.
Author’s Note: Let’s just all consider this my therapy after DH. If one warning will not suffice, here it is again - don’t read this if you are in complete denial about the end of DH. My first time posting at R/T challenge, and it’s been great! *Runs off to write madly before the deadline*
It was all about the release.
How many times had Professor Flitwick in Charms told her? Or McGonagall in Transfiguration? The way you held the wand, the feel of your fingers around the handle, the silken smoothness of the slight indentions your fingers had so lovingly caressed into the wood. The way you flicked the wrist just so, extended the arm, elbow slightly bent to the side, your stance firm but flexible, your arm joined with your voice allowing the spell to release, to burst through the tip and come to life in a jet of green, or red, or white in front of you.
As she twisted her way past piles of rubble, bodies lying broken and unnaturally still, and wizards and witches still firing spells at one another, she saw McGonagall fighting two Death Eaters at once, and making a nice piece of it.
Tonks zeroed in, for an instant, on her former professor’s flick of wrist, the way she made her twelve-inch willow send both men hurtling through the air. Her release was quick as a whip, as severe as her voice and sharp as her mind. The willow whistled as she cut the air with one last spell, causing her victims to scream in agony as her Sectumsempra hit true.
The instant passed as she swept past them, and she caught glimpses of others, releasing their magic in their own way, each with a different result. And then, there she was. The madwoman who had taken so much from them already, who was hell-bent on taking more.
And they were both ready to fight.
As Tonks sent spells hurtling through the air, aimed at her aunt amidst the melee of the battle raging around her, she somehow took the time to notice how she was controlling her wand, what each flick of the wrist and twist of the arms did to the spell she hurled at dear Aunt Bella. A part of her brain screamed at her to concentrate, to get the hell out of dodge so she could find her husband and get them both to the safety of her mother’s house.
But the other part, that oddly detached section of her brain that she couldn’t seem to make understand the severity, the enormity of the task at hand, could only see how deftly her aunt held her wand, how well she controlled every single jet of light that bolted from the end of it, even while she was cackling madly and darting - no, Tonks could swear she was almost skipping - around the rubble and bodies that had fallen before her. She could see how perfectly her own wand, a 13-inch ivy carved wand, with a core of dragon heartstring, fit into her hand, how well she herself used the powers contained within. No matter how clumsy she was, how many troll leg umbrella stands she managed to upset, there had never been a question of how well she handled a wand. Her father always used to kid her that she had somehow ended up with all her coordination in her hands and none in her feet….
Her father. The thought of him, laughing and kissing her knee as he performed a healing charm, the smell of his aftershave as he tucked her in every night, brought a jolt of pain to her heart that almost left her breathless. Thought of him, then of her beautiful son, waiting in his grandmother’s arms for his mother, brought her crashing back to reality. She had to find Remus. She had to get home. To him.
Teddy.
Suddenly, she knew. She knew she had been a fool to leave him behind. She knew she would never see him again. Oh, Merlin, she had to go home. Now.
Remus.
And there, as if she had conjured him with a thought, he was standing in front of her, his back to her as he and Dolohov battled one another, sweat and blood and dirt cleaving streaks down his face, his blue eyes the color of steel and fixed determinedly on Dolohov’s face. His wand, holly and fifteen inches, was serving him well, and she felt a stirring of pride and love so deep it almost brought her to her knees. After darting one particularly close curse, Remus dove behind a tree and made to regain his bearings. As he chanced a look from behind the ancient oak, he caught sight of her.
It was everything and nothing at the same moment, as their eyes locked and they knew, each of them in their own way, that this would be their last battle, their last hour, their last moment together. They each saw their own hearts reflected in the other, and each felt the same overwhelming love and sorrow and pride. They each saw Teddy shining through the other’s face, and knew their love was in this world to stay.
The moment shattered into a million pieces as Bellatrix Lestrange gave a deranged shriek, and the night exploded in agony as the Cruciatus hit Tonks square in the back. She glimpsed the twist of agony across Remus’ face that mirrored the excruciating pain exploding inside her, then her eyes rolled back in her head as she wavered between consciousness and black bliss, her ears trying to distinguish the source of the roaring in her brain…was it Remus, or herself? Or both?
She never even felt herself hit the ground. She tried to open her eyes, tried to comprehend fully what she already knew in her heart was about to transpire. Her ears picked up her name, the hoarse cry rending the fabric of her heart - how many times do I have to tell you, Remus? Don’t call me Nymphadora…Another flash of green from across the field, and she dimly felt the ground beneath her shudder slightly as Remus’ face came into blurry view. His eyes - oh, how she had always loved them - were drifting closed, locked fixedly on her. A moment, a second, a lifetime in one look.
I’m sorry, my love.
I know. I love you.
And I you. Forever.
She knew the minute he left her, the instant he was lost to her earthly form. But instead of the overwhelming sorrow she had always expected to come, there was a sense of peace like she had never experienced before, one that engulfed her and left her with a small smile on her face. It was the smile of someone sure in her love, and just as sure in her fate.
And with that knowledge seemed to come the knowledge of everything at once. Good would prevail, and evil would be vanquished this very night. Teddy would grow up to make his parents proud. Harry would do what needed to be done. It was all so certain in her mind, so crystal clear as if she had seen it happen, though she knew she never would. She knew, and yet.
She smiled.
That smile was what greeted her aunt as she came to leer over her, taking a moment to enjoy the death of her niece. “What is it, little miss Nymphadora?” hissed Bellatrix, crouching down in front of Tonks, her wild eyes growing wide as she bared her teeth. She slid the tip of her wand across Tonks’ neck. “Is your wolf dead? Oh, what a shame, what a shame,” she cackled, narrowing her eyes in malicious glee. “And you just wait ‘til I get my hands on that little pup of his.”
Tonks simply looked up at her, the tiny smile still playing on her lips, even amidst the pain still coursing through her body. “You can’t win,” she whispered. “Teddy will never know you, will never feel your hatred, because you will never get that close to him.”
Bellatrix stood abruptly, her eyes like daggers as she backed away from Tonks. “We’ll just see about that,” she hissed.
As her aunt raised her wand, Tonks watched her hand come up, elbow perfectly bent, fingers wrapped assuredly around the handle. Images flashed in her brain, slowly and at the speed of sound, replaying over and over but never enough. Oh Merlin, never, ever enough.
Teddy’s first smile.
The look on Remus’ face on their wedding day.
Her father’s hug before getting on the Hogwarts Express.
Her mother’s sure hands as they soothed her bruises.
The words formed around Bella’s tongue, and a moment later, she released.
Then there was nothing
But light.
Author: phoenixfyre13
Format/Word Count: Oneshot angst, about 1,400
Rating: PG-13 for safety, adult themes (i.e., death)
Prompt: Prompt 23, release
Warning: Character death(s)
Summary: The things one considers when staring into the face of death.
Author’s Note: Let’s just all consider this my therapy after DH. If one warning will not suffice, here it is again - don’t read this if you are in complete denial about the end of DH. My first time posting at R/T challenge, and it’s been great! *Runs off to write madly before the deadline*
It was all about the release.
How many times had Professor Flitwick in Charms told her? Or McGonagall in Transfiguration? The way you held the wand, the feel of your fingers around the handle, the silken smoothness of the slight indentions your fingers had so lovingly caressed into the wood. The way you flicked the wrist just so, extended the arm, elbow slightly bent to the side, your stance firm but flexible, your arm joined with your voice allowing the spell to release, to burst through the tip and come to life in a jet of green, or red, or white in front of you.
As she twisted her way past piles of rubble, bodies lying broken and unnaturally still, and wizards and witches still firing spells at one another, she saw McGonagall fighting two Death Eaters at once, and making a nice piece of it.
Tonks zeroed in, for an instant, on her former professor’s flick of wrist, the way she made her twelve-inch willow send both men hurtling through the air. Her release was quick as a whip, as severe as her voice and sharp as her mind. The willow whistled as she cut the air with one last spell, causing her victims to scream in agony as her Sectumsempra hit true.
The instant passed as she swept past them, and she caught glimpses of others, releasing their magic in their own way, each with a different result. And then, there she was. The madwoman who had taken so much from them already, who was hell-bent on taking more.
And they were both ready to fight.
As Tonks sent spells hurtling through the air, aimed at her aunt amidst the melee of the battle raging around her, she somehow took the time to notice how she was controlling her wand, what each flick of the wrist and twist of the arms did to the spell she hurled at dear Aunt Bella. A part of her brain screamed at her to concentrate, to get the hell out of dodge so she could find her husband and get them both to the safety of her mother’s house.
But the other part, that oddly detached section of her brain that she couldn’t seem to make understand the severity, the enormity of the task at hand, could only see how deftly her aunt held her wand, how well she controlled every single jet of light that bolted from the end of it, even while she was cackling madly and darting - no, Tonks could swear she was almost skipping - around the rubble and bodies that had fallen before her. She could see how perfectly her own wand, a 13-inch ivy carved wand, with a core of dragon heartstring, fit into her hand, how well she herself used the powers contained within. No matter how clumsy she was, how many troll leg umbrella stands she managed to upset, there had never been a question of how well she handled a wand. Her father always used to kid her that she had somehow ended up with all her coordination in her hands and none in her feet….
Her father. The thought of him, laughing and kissing her knee as he performed a healing charm, the smell of his aftershave as he tucked her in every night, brought a jolt of pain to her heart that almost left her breathless. Thought of him, then of her beautiful son, waiting in his grandmother’s arms for his mother, brought her crashing back to reality. She had to find Remus. She had to get home. To him.
Teddy.
Suddenly, she knew. She knew she had been a fool to leave him behind. She knew she would never see him again. Oh, Merlin, she had to go home. Now.
Remus.
And there, as if she had conjured him with a thought, he was standing in front of her, his back to her as he and Dolohov battled one another, sweat and blood and dirt cleaving streaks down his face, his blue eyes the color of steel and fixed determinedly on Dolohov’s face. His wand, holly and fifteen inches, was serving him well, and she felt a stirring of pride and love so deep it almost brought her to her knees. After darting one particularly close curse, Remus dove behind a tree and made to regain his bearings. As he chanced a look from behind the ancient oak, he caught sight of her.
It was everything and nothing at the same moment, as their eyes locked and they knew, each of them in their own way, that this would be their last battle, their last hour, their last moment together. They each saw their own hearts reflected in the other, and each felt the same overwhelming love and sorrow and pride. They each saw Teddy shining through the other’s face, and knew their love was in this world to stay.
The moment shattered into a million pieces as Bellatrix Lestrange gave a deranged shriek, and the night exploded in agony as the Cruciatus hit Tonks square in the back. She glimpsed the twist of agony across Remus’ face that mirrored the excruciating pain exploding inside her, then her eyes rolled back in her head as she wavered between consciousness and black bliss, her ears trying to distinguish the source of the roaring in her brain…was it Remus, or herself? Or both?
She never even felt herself hit the ground. She tried to open her eyes, tried to comprehend fully what she already knew in her heart was about to transpire. Her ears picked up her name, the hoarse cry rending the fabric of her heart - how many times do I have to tell you, Remus? Don’t call me Nymphadora…Another flash of green from across the field, and she dimly felt the ground beneath her shudder slightly as Remus’ face came into blurry view. His eyes - oh, how she had always loved them - were drifting closed, locked fixedly on her. A moment, a second, a lifetime in one look.
I’m sorry, my love.
I know. I love you.
And I you. Forever.
She knew the minute he left her, the instant he was lost to her earthly form. But instead of the overwhelming sorrow she had always expected to come, there was a sense of peace like she had never experienced before, one that engulfed her and left her with a small smile on her face. It was the smile of someone sure in her love, and just as sure in her fate.
And with that knowledge seemed to come the knowledge of everything at once. Good would prevail, and evil would be vanquished this very night. Teddy would grow up to make his parents proud. Harry would do what needed to be done. It was all so certain in her mind, so crystal clear as if she had seen it happen, though she knew she never would. She knew, and yet.
She smiled.
That smile was what greeted her aunt as she came to leer over her, taking a moment to enjoy the death of her niece. “What is it, little miss Nymphadora?” hissed Bellatrix, crouching down in front of Tonks, her wild eyes growing wide as she bared her teeth. She slid the tip of her wand across Tonks’ neck. “Is your wolf dead? Oh, what a shame, what a shame,” she cackled, narrowing her eyes in malicious glee. “And you just wait ‘til I get my hands on that little pup of his.”
Tonks simply looked up at her, the tiny smile still playing on her lips, even amidst the pain still coursing through her body. “You can’t win,” she whispered. “Teddy will never know you, will never feel your hatred, because you will never get that close to him.”
Bellatrix stood abruptly, her eyes like daggers as she backed away from Tonks. “We’ll just see about that,” she hissed.
As her aunt raised her wand, Tonks watched her hand come up, elbow perfectly bent, fingers wrapped assuredly around the handle. Images flashed in her brain, slowly and at the speed of sound, replaying over and over but never enough. Oh Merlin, never, ever enough.
Teddy’s first smile.
The look on Remus’ face on their wedding day.
Her father’s hug before getting on the Hogwarts Express.
Her mother’s sure hands as they soothed her bruises.
The words formed around Bella’s tongue, and a moment later, she released.
Then there was nothing
But light.