Bravo! Yes, I'm a total sucker for Remus dreams Tonks is still alive fic. The last paragraph and the repeated use of "since" has a really great ominous drum to it.
Minor concrit: fascinated with unblinking eyes doesn't quite make sense. Maybe "fascinated, watching with unblinking eyes" instead?
“You look beautiful.” He says and she just smiles should be “You look beautiful,” he says and she just smiles.
The comma separating "that is all it is" from the rest of the sentence should not be there, and personally I'd change the first "that" to "the" and the last "that is" to "that's" to avoid the three "that" construct.
Oh no! I did so not expect such a sad ending at the beginning of this story. Especially the last sentence got to me... you really used both the words and the feelings portrayed very well.
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Poor Remus...left alone, again. *sobs some more*
One teeny spelling error I caught (fifth paragraph down):
When it hits him it’s hard, like a stunning spell to the stomach. He rises from the med and walks to the vanity.
I think the bolded word should be "bed".
Thanks for sharing; it is a lovely, sad story that when JKR is all done, could be more true than we all want. You did a beautiful job!
Susan
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MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP!
WANT HAPPY FIC!
WHERE'S THE FLUFF!!!
::whimper::
x(
damned death eaters! They all know how to eff up love!
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Minor concrit: fascinated with unblinking eyes doesn't quite make sense. Maybe "fascinated, watching with unblinking eyes" instead?
“You look beautiful.” He says and she just smiles should be “You look beautiful,” he says and she just smiles.
The comma separating "that is all it is" from the rest of the sentence should not be there, and personally I'd change the first "that" to "the" and the last "that is" to "that's" to avoid the three "that" construct.
There's also a typo: "dries" instead of "dried"
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I did so not expect such a sad ending at the beginning of this story.
Especially the last sentence got to me... you really used both the words and the feelings portrayed very well.
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