(no subject)

[routinefumbling]

We slow danced in the living room. He kissed me a million times and told me I smelled the same. "I used to smell you, randomly. You were embedded in my clothes." I told him I needed to go slow. He has no idea what this past month has entailed and part of me doesn't want him to know. He thinks one day we're going to get married. He's way too eager and I'm too vulnerable right now. I don't know what to think.

Tonight I'm going to a party at the ex boys house. I asked him if it was okay if I came. I kind of wish he would have said no.