The One Where Everything Went Wrong
Who: Everyone in the Breeding Centre House!
Where: ...The Breeding Centre House; Assorted areas of Goldenrod City
When: Evening of October 29th into early morning October 30th, beginning about a half hour after THIS post.
Summary: Souji and Yosuke have a fight! All over the house! In front of everyone! And then things happen and Yosuke wanders ( Read more... )
Where: ...The Breeding Centre House; Assorted areas of Goldenrod City
When: Evening of October 29th into early morning October 30th, beginning about a half hour after THIS post.
Summary: Souji and Yosuke have a fight! All over the house! In front of everyone! And then things happen and Yosuke wanders ( Read more... )
[ He stays at the top of the stairs until a few seconds after Yosuke has finished speaking, he slowly walks down the stairs, deciding to sit two steps above him. Sitting right beside him is probably not a great idea, especially with proving that the crush is not one-sided. The last thing that Souji needs is to give off the wrong impression or anything. ]
[ With the other having his back turned, Souji doesn't have a clue that Yosuke is starting to tear up, at least for now. ] No, you were right.
I should have told you weeks ago about the trip and-- [ He takes a deep breath here. It's always hard admitting that part of him, the part where he feels like he should be the strong leader, the one that everyone turns to. It's been hard to admit to Merlin, it's hard to listen to from his Shadow, it's hard all the time. ] And were right about how I'm always trying to be the leader.
[ That last part comes a bit quieter than the rest, but at least he has said it. Going from the loner kid who has never wanted to make any friends due to multiple reasons to all of a sudden, Senpai, Sensei, Partner, Leader, Souji-kun, Seta-san, Souji, Souji, Souji. Everyone depending on him to listen to them or lead them through battle or help them through their problems, it's new and it makes him feel like he has to live up to that expectation. It's something that he needs to overcome with it being one of his biggest flaws. ]
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[Souji, the one who refused any help when he was alone with no resources in a freezing cave. He was admitting this. He was acknowledging that Yosuke said something that was right, that was true. Yosuke knew this, and he's not the only one who's noticed. But... they say admitting the problem is the first step to fixing it, right?]
[It doesn't stop his eyes from being wide, and it doesn't stop a few silent tears from spilling over. It's much more subdued than before. Though his pulse is racing and he feels like his heart is in his stomach - and that his stomach is in his throat - he doesn't feel as if he's going to break down. He can't right now, it wouldn't be good for either of them.] It's just... you can lean on us. I mean, shit, Souji. We're supposed to be equals.
[He pauses again, realizing his tone may be harsher than he intends. It's just a surge of emotions, and keeping each one of them in check is strenuous. He draws in a breath, then lets out an audible exhale.] I wouldn't have cared if you said it when we were tired or whatever. I -- it just felt like you didn't care when you said it that way. [Another pause.] Honestly...
I wasn't thinking straight, but... things have been weird. [He lets out a self-deprecating chuckle.] Like you were hiding something, you know? So just announcing you were leaving the Centre for so long without even bringing it up first...
[There's more he wants to say, but he can't seem to find the right words. Maybe it's a fear of pushing too far into that other category that he's not ready to delve into yet... but when it comes down to it, Yosuke knows they're connected. He knows there's no avoiding it. All he can hope right now is that Souji will get where he's going with this.]
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[ Souji shifts on the step of the stair, the wood beneath him creaking loudly in the awkward silence. Falling into that other topic, the one that has put the most tension between them right now, it's not something that he wants to bring up right now. Of course, it does need to be addressed sooner or later, but he wants to get everything else out of the way first. ]
...Do you remember the event with the Shedinjas stealing souls? [ This may seem completely irrelevant to their topic at hand, but Souji will connect it shortly. ]
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Yeah... [His expressions falls slightly though. It's something he can't forget, not with what he failed to do before it, or what he was forced to realize in that... coma.] What about it? That's... got nothing to do with this.
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That's the reason why I'm heading to Cianwood. Being all the way in the Ice Path while you and Rise have been knocked out, not able to do anything; having everyone call me and panicking because we didn't know what to do. [ He pauses, recalling the details of that moment. Back when he has to put on his Leader persona and try to be the calm one of the group, even if he has become to feel sick with worry. ] I don't want that to happen again and the faster I get the badges, the better prepared I am.
[ Then there's that thing that Souji has been hiding; one that Yosuke probably knows all too well by now, just what Souji has been hiding away for six whole months behind little coffee cups. ]
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Y-you... you idiot...
[But when he says it, there's something almost wry about his tone, a stifled, mocking chuckle to it. Stupid. He may be the leader, and he may be the glue that holds the team together... but sometimes he is just so stupid. Not that Yosuke is any less stupid, and he knows that, but...]
[It takes him a minute to find the words, or rather, to find his voice to say the words.] Why -- why didn't you just say that?
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Heat of the moment, I guess. Also-- [ Another pause, looming over the thoughts that have been on his mind for the past few months, all the way back to his Shadow encounters, his biggest flaws. ] I guess that means I have to admit my... weakness, never wanting to be the imperfect leader...
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Aren't... aren't you the one who accepted everyone despite their weaknesses? We'd do the same for you. You can't be perfect, and it pisses me off that you try to be.
[It definitely makes him feel not good enough sometimes, and with all these other feelings circulating in him, it's only brought him down some when it's come up in thought.]
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Yeah... Sorry. I suppose I just need a good punch to keep that in mind. [ Because he does this so many times, always pushing himself until he falls ill. It's not an easy habit for him to break and he knows this. He will really have to have a reminder about this now and then. ]
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We're equals. Don't forget that.
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Got it, partner. [ There's then a hesitation, a pause of how to phrase the next thing. The stairs creak once again as he shifts weight from one side of his body to the other, clearly unsure about something. ] And... about that kiss...
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