The wedding feast at Bradford.
To Stranraer on the luxurious Stena Line where I sit in first class and have the pleasure to meet Shona who runs the place sans pareil. Thence to the train and chav hell. In front of me is a young Mum with two feral infants. "NATHAAAAN stop it". pause. "JORAAAAN, you want some fizzy drink?" Next to me is a heavily pregnant Glaswegian (with brat). Opposite her a bald radge who was swapping life stories. A few diplomatic coughs and rustling of the Grauniad yet still no respite from chav hell. Baldy notes this.
"They are only kids..."
"I am only trying to finish the crossword." I glare at him.
"Don't look at me like that".
"You aren't in the army now, so keep schtumm". A few passengers look our way to see if it will kick off. Baldy busies himself with Chav Mum about his trip to Asia. He avoids eye contact with me and that is that.
The chav hell continues at Preston with the arrival of four deaf cunts who use their disability to put their feet on seats and make loud curious sealion type noises. Behind me sit half a dozen brats and their feral Mothers, shouting whilst the ticket collector studiously ignores them. Tomorrow, Part Two, Our Lord Ron arrives in Yorkshire and turns water into wine.
copyright Ron Broxted 2010.
"They are only kids..."
"I am only trying to finish the crossword." I glare at him.
"Don't look at me like that".
"You aren't in the army now, so keep schtumm". A few passengers look our way to see if it will kick off. Baldy busies himself with Chav Mum about his trip to Asia. He avoids eye contact with me and that is that.
The chav hell continues at Preston with the arrival of four deaf cunts who use their disability to put their feet on seats and make loud curious sealion type noises. Behind me sit half a dozen brats and their feral Mothers, shouting whilst the ticket collector studiously ignores them. Tomorrow, Part Two, Our Lord Ron arrives in Yorkshire and turns water into wine.
copyright Ron Broxted 2010.