Kermit THE Frog reporting.
I know that I'm not supposed to be feeling differently yet, but I want to be feeling differently.
So far the only change I've noticed is that there is a very *specific* scenario that keeps playing out in my head instead of just generalized thoughts. It's something that involves something I need and want to do, but I'm afraid to do it because it feels like a horror movie where your worst thought comes true whether you want it to or not. I do have to say that I appreciate that my mind is this creative though. I feel I should also say that I have no INTENTION of doing this scenario and no real desire to do it. It's just there whenever I think about the thing that I need/want to do.
In other news
I have lost 20 pounds since the beginning of the year, totally on purpose. It's clear to me from this time and the last time I lost significant amounts of weight that I simply HAVE to keep track of what food I eat. I'm not dieting - I'm eating whatever I want - I'm just being careful about portions. I've also been eating a lot more vegetables, which started out as a "Less calories, so I'll do that" and ended up "HOLY SHIT THESE ARE GOOD, GIVE ME ALL THE VEGETABLES". Except for carrots. You guys can keep those.
In writing news, I've been working on my Nano story and trying to finish it. it still has a long way to go, but I just got through one of the big scenes, so I'm happy about that. I've been doing some research for the next bit, and even though 99.99% of my research won't go into it, at least I'll sort of sound like I know what I'm talking about. I have a bunch of stuff that I started, but I'm beginning to think that if I don't write something in one fell swoop, it will never ever be finished ever. EVER. I'm still debating the BFF fest, but I'm paranoid about slacking on something for someone else. Pretty sure I won't be doing either wave of BBB unless I get inspired. I have some ideas, but nothing that's really coalesced in my brain.
Otherwise life continues apace. I'm in the planning stages for a major PTA event, which may be the last one we ever have, and I'm kind of resigned to it now. It's not a priority for people. People care about their own kids but not about anyone else's and I can't make them no matter how hard I try. And that's okay. It's not a failure on my part. It's not because I'm not trying hard enough. It just is. I would like to see it last until the youngest is out of elementary school (two more years), but I don't think we even have enough bodies to get us that far.
Of course, this all ties into my own issues and the fact that membership and particiipation has dwindled for as long as I've been a member/on the board, and so obviously it's all because of me, and it's amazing how someone with low self esteem can think so much of herself, isn't it? LOL. The truth of the matter is that no one's trying very hard anymore because we're all tired. Exhausted, really, with the weight of work and caring.
I got my credit card statement today and it is pretty much all Fall Out Boy and William Beckett. Also the constant and repetitive movements required for making/bagging/selling popcorn have given me nicer definition in my tricep and bicep on my right side. My left side is jealous. Of course, my left side has a bad shoulder, so not too jealous, as it doesn't really want to work that hard. There's talk of me possibly moving the machine inside so I don't have to stand out in the cold, but we'll have to see. I'm sure the teachers will complain about the smell of popcorn if I do that.
I'm taking the kidlets up to my mom's for two days for their mid-winter break in a few minutes, so I'll have a whole day off without them tomorrow. redheadaholic and I are going to go to the movies and eat good food and possibly watch more Babylon 5. The crazy partying never stops when she and I get together, let me tell you.
I shall leave you with this picture, and encourage you to tell me things about it/stories about it in the comments. Because UNF.
So far the only change I've noticed is that there is a very *specific* scenario that keeps playing out in my head instead of just generalized thoughts. It's something that involves something I need and want to do, but I'm afraid to do it because it feels like a horror movie where your worst thought comes true whether you want it to or not. I do have to say that I appreciate that my mind is this creative though. I feel I should also say that I have no INTENTION of doing this scenario and no real desire to do it. It's just there whenever I think about the thing that I need/want to do.
In other news
I have lost 20 pounds since the beginning of the year, totally on purpose. It's clear to me from this time and the last time I lost significant amounts of weight that I simply HAVE to keep track of what food I eat. I'm not dieting - I'm eating whatever I want - I'm just being careful about portions. I've also been eating a lot more vegetables, which started out as a "Less calories, so I'll do that" and ended up "HOLY SHIT THESE ARE GOOD, GIVE ME ALL THE VEGETABLES". Except for carrots. You guys can keep those.
In writing news, I've been working on my Nano story and trying to finish it. it still has a long way to go, but I just got through one of the big scenes, so I'm happy about that. I've been doing some research for the next bit, and even though 99.99% of my research won't go into it, at least I'll sort of sound like I know what I'm talking about. I have a bunch of stuff that I started, but I'm beginning to think that if I don't write something in one fell swoop, it will never ever be finished ever. EVER. I'm still debating the BFF fest, but I'm paranoid about slacking on something for someone else. Pretty sure I won't be doing either wave of BBB unless I get inspired. I have some ideas, but nothing that's really coalesced in my brain.
Otherwise life continues apace. I'm in the planning stages for a major PTA event, which may be the last one we ever have, and I'm kind of resigned to it now. It's not a priority for people. People care about their own kids but not about anyone else's and I can't make them no matter how hard I try. And that's okay. It's not a failure on my part. It's not because I'm not trying hard enough. It just is. I would like to see it last until the youngest is out of elementary school (two more years), but I don't think we even have enough bodies to get us that far.
Of course, this all ties into my own issues and the fact that membership and particiipation has dwindled for as long as I've been a member/on the board, and so obviously it's all because of me, and it's amazing how someone with low self esteem can think so much of herself, isn't it? LOL. The truth of the matter is that no one's trying very hard anymore because we're all tired. Exhausted, really, with the weight of work and caring.
I got my credit card statement today and it is pretty much all Fall Out Boy and William Beckett. Also the constant and repetitive movements required for making/bagging/selling popcorn have given me nicer definition in my tricep and bicep on my right side. My left side is jealous. Of course, my left side has a bad shoulder, so not too jealous, as it doesn't really want to work that hard. There's talk of me possibly moving the machine inside so I don't have to stand out in the cold, but we'll have to see. I'm sure the teachers will complain about the smell of popcorn if I do that.
I'm taking the kidlets up to my mom's for two days for their mid-winter break in a few minutes, so I'll have a whole day off without them tomorrow. redheadaholic and I are going to go to the movies and eat good food and possibly watch more Babylon 5. The crazy partying never stops when she and I get together, let me tell you.
I shall leave you with this picture, and encourage you to tell me things about it/stories about it in the comments. Because UNF.