Living Louder [2/2]
Three hours, countless toasts, at least seven bottles of soju, two rounds of tequila later, Junmi finds herself squished in a booth between Minchae and Chanyi, clutching a glass of blue andy. It's her second one, and despite Minchae's claim of the alcohol levels in it, she finds herself somewhat fuzzy around the edges.
Most of them are more buzzed than Junmi; Yixin had taken Hongmin home an hour earlier. Chanyi is a loud drunk, and keeps flailing her long limbs everywhere, having hit Junmi thrice already, apologizing profusely every time.
Taeeun and Hayeon had showed up, courtesy of Minchae, bringing Lu Hua - a bright bubbly girl with waist-length blonde hair - with them. Lu Hua had immediately glued herself to Minchae's side, and hadn't really left.
Taeeun and Hayeon had vanished.
Junmi empties her blue andy, cradles the glass in her hands for a while, wondering when she suddenly had been okay with alcohol. When they had gotten to the club, she had started out with regular cokes, but after an hour or so, Minchae had told Junmi to buy her own drinks as she had finishes Minchae's blue andy.
"Eonni," Junmi says after a while, carefully poking Minchae's soft side. Minchae turns away from Lu Hua to smile brightly at Junmi, her eyes slightly hazy.
"What's up, my cute Junmi?" Minchae says, slurring slightly as she leans forward to press a quick kiss against Junmi's cheek, leaving Junmi baffled, surprised. Minchae giggles as she pulls away, hands cupping Junmi's face. "You're so, so very cute."
"Eonni, I need to- can I please- use the bathroom?" Junmi mumbles, finding it hard to speak because Minchae is squishing her cheeks.
"But of course," Minchae croons, unceremoniously shoving Lu Hua off the seat so she lands with her butt on the floor, making room so Junmi is able to squirm out of the booth, walking off to find the bathroom.
"You push me around, and you keep kissing other girls. Kim Minchae don't you love me?" Junmi hears Lu Hua pout as Minchae laughs, probably helping her up from the floor.
This club is as crowded as the one Yixin's band had played in, making it almost impossible for Junmi to look for the bathrooms without running into someone. She doesn't mind as much though, now, whenever she runs into a warm body. Her own body feels fuzzy, warm, and she feels affectionate all of a sudden.
Junmi pauses her bathroom search for a couple of minutes to talk to a girl with the biggest lips she's ever seen, stopping to tell her exactly that. She wonders briefly, subconsciously if it was a bit rude, but luckily Lip Girl just laughs and ruffles Junmi's hair, telling her she's cute.
After a while, she does find the bathroom, empty, bathing in a blue light. She finishes her business, washes her hands and then proceeds to look herself in the mirror, using a couple of minutes to make faces at herself.
Back in the club, she loiters against one of the walls, simply looking at the crowd of people, everyone dancing close, close, bodies rubbing together. It reminds her of an ant colony.
The song booming through the speakers is horrible, all computer made, heavy beats and no voices, just thumping.
A chill runs down her spine as she suddenly, in the corner of her eye, notices two very familiar people.
There are hands absolutely everywhere, under shirts and down pants, lips locked as Taeeun and Hayeon grind against each other, clothes a complete mess. Taeeun, half a head taller than Hayeon, is crowding into Hayeon's space, both her hands fondling Hayeon's breasts, Hayeon's shirt pushed up to her armpits.
Junmi's brain is leaking out of her ears.
In her haze, unable to look away from her two friends, freshman helpers, Junmi suddenly fees someone grab her wrist. A soft voice telling her that it's time for her to get home.
The next Junmi knows, she's out of the club in the still warm august night. The hand is still around Junmi's waist, although not holding as tight onto her as it did previously.
Junmi pulls out of her daze, meeting Kyungseo's gaze.
Kyungseo is impossible to read, face blank as she looks at Junmi. She's still in her loud, vibrant stage make up, and it's too much but it's beautiful. She's beautiful.
There's a softness to Kyungseo's gaze then, lips curling slightly as she speaks a simple. "Thank you."
Junmi has had too much to drink.
"Yes, I think so too," Kyungseo says wryly, a soft smile grazing her lips for the first time that night, for the first time ever, in Junmi's eyes, presence. She should never stop smiling.
"Are you always this generous with compliments?" Kyungseo asks, but she's still smiling some, and it makes Junmi feels at ease, safe, even though the girl in front of her is a stranger.
"Apparently when I get tipsy," Junmi says, looking away from Kyungseo, to her hands, fingers picking at one of her cuticles, her ears warm.
A soft rustle of wind swipes over the street, its coolness welcome. It soothes the heat in Junmi's bones, her face, but not the burn in her lower torso, thighs.
"Where do you live?" Kyungseo asks quietly, her face blank again, big eyes still soft. "Minchae eonni is your RA isn't she?"
Junmi nods once, twice. A car drives past them, blasting loud music from its speakers. Kyungseo frowns. Junmi doesn't think she should frown like that.
"I think- Do you want me to follow you home?" Kyungseo asks eventually, voice even but laced with something Junmi's mind is unable to pick up on. It makes Junmi's chest warm, something fluttering in her heart as she notices Kyungseo briefly avoiding her gaze.
Junmi should say no, maybe. She doesn't know Kyungseo, doesn't know who she is. But then again, Junmi has no idea where she is and how to get home, so maybe.
"That'd be nice," Junmi replies. "That is, if you want to?"
Kyungseo nods.
The morning after, Junmi wakes up in her own bed, still wearing the dress from the night before, hair a mess.
With a text from Kyungseo on her phone. Junmi can’t remember giving Kyungseo her number.
From: Kyungseo
6:43 am
Are you doing anything today?
Junmi almost tumbles out of bed in her eagerness, the phone joining her on the floor. She’s a mess of limbs, barely awake as she lets her fingers travel over the phone’s keyboard, chewing on her bottom lip. Junmi hasn’t anything planned for today, maybe save for starting on the reading list for one of her classes.
She considers her options before she replies.
To: Kyungseo
10.43 am.
Sorry for responding so late. No, nothing. Why?
Junmi clutches her phone to her chest, heart fluttering as she waits for a response. Junmi is never - was never - as direct as this. If this had been the old Junmi - church choir Junmi - she wouldn’t have added that “Why?” to her response. She would merely respond to the question. Church choir Junmi would never have put friends - strangers - above reading, above school.
Kyungseo’s response comes half an hour later, when Junmi has showered, a towel wrapped around her, hairband in her wet hair as she tosses herself onto the bed to read Kyungseo’s message.
From: Kyungseo
11:19 am.
I was thinking about our convo last night, about how you wanted to rediscover music?
Junmi doesn’t remember their conversation from last night at all. The last thing she remembers is Kyungseo offering to follow her home. Junmi has no plan to let Kyungseo know that.
To: Kyungseo
11:21 am.
Music is… nice. What did you have in mind? she writes instead.
Junmi meets Kyungseo outside her dorm, since Junmi doesn’t know the city that well, and Kyungseo insists she could meet her.
Minutes earlier, when Junmi had fretted around her dorm room, stressed out of her mind because she wasn’t sure what to wear, Minchae had come in, wondering what all the loud yelping noises came from.
The smirk playing out on Minchae’s face when Junmi told her about her meeting with Kyungseo reminded Junmi of the Cheshire Cat in Alice in Wonderland. Minchae’s hair is in two pigtails, curls falling into her neck, wearing her pajamas as she picks out an outfit for Junmi.
“This is perfect,” Minchae had declared, touching Junmi’s face fondly as she presented Junmi with a pair of black pants and a plaid shirt; something Junmi got from Kyuri once but had never used. Minchae had also helped her braid her hair into one long, thick braid falling over her shoulder.
Lu Hua had showed up and re-claimed Minchae, but not before Minchae, choired by Lu Hua, wished Junmi luck on her big date.
Junmi flushes at the memory.
Kyungseo’s hair has purple streaks in it, matching her skirt, black band t-shirt tucked into it. The thigh-highs she’s wearing has red bows on the elastic that bites into the skin of her thick thighs. Junmi wants to cry.
“Hey,” Kyungseo says when she’s reaching Junmi, eyes smiling at her.
“Hello,” Junmi greets, her nails sinking into the skin of her palms, teeth into her bottom lip.
“I’m glad you had time today,” Kyungseo says, voice genuine. This time, her lips smile as well. Junmi’s chest does that tight thing again.
Kyungseo guides her downtown, away from the main street, to a small building. Junmi would never had approached it if Kyungseo hadn’t been the one dragging her there. Its exterior looks like it needed a fresh layer of painting, as the old one is peeling off in patches of red and black.
They walk inside, and they’re met with a heavily perfumed scent, that turns out to be coming from scented candles. The soft noise of instruments is also there from the second they pass through the doors, and Junmi lets Kyungseo guide her through the empty hallway until they reach a mostly empty room. A stage is placed on the very end, blood-red curtains hanging down either side of the stage.
Kyungseo brings her index finger to her lips, her free hand grabbing Junmi’s wrist. There’s a band up on the stage playing, but there’s no audience save for two, three people on the chairs, and Junmi and Kyungseo.
They sit down on two stools in the back of the room, where they can hear everything, but not see everything.
“Last night you told me you wanted to change. That you- you wanted to rediscover your passion for music,” Kyungseo says under her breath, her lips brushing the shell of Junmi’s ear as she speaks. Something hot, heavy coils low in Junmi’s tummy. To distract herself she tries to count the lamps hanging from the roof, the tiles on the floor, but to no avail.
“You asked me why I like this genre of music, why I’m in a band instead of a choir, why I’m passionate about this,” Kyungseo continues. There’s a tilt to her voice that makes Junmi assume it’s a question.
Junmi, in lieu of answering, hums. Nods.
They sit there in silence as the band on stage plays through three songs. Junmi has never heard their songs before, but Kyungseo tells her in the middle of the second song that these songs are all cover songs, made by other artists, not the five adolescents standing on stage. She still thinks they’re good - maybe not as good as Kyungseo’s band - but it’s impressive, still.
“Who are they?” Junmi asks eventually, turning in her seat to look at Kyungseo. She flushes at the closeness; Junmi’s knee brushes along Kyungseo’s thigh, sending a fire up Junmi’s veins.
“I think they’re calling themselves ‘Symphony Soldiers’ but as far as I know that’s just a working title for their brand,” Kyungseo says, pursing her lips. “But their age average is just fifteen so they still have time to find themselves, to work out their sound.”
The last sentence is still ringing in Junmi’s ears when they leave the building.
“What was that place?” Junmi asks later when they’re seated in a booth in an ice cream bar, Kyungseo skimming through the menu.
The ice cream bar had been Junmi’s idea.
“That,” Kyungseo begins, folding the menu so she can read the other side. “Is our sanctuary, I guess. It’s where we gather, where we play music, where our dreams begins. Where my dreams began.”
Junmi looks through the menu herself, deciding on a vanilla milkshake, putting the menu back in its slot on the wall, waiting for Kyungseo to decide. It takes a couple of minutes before the waitress shows up, bright and bubbly, asking for their orders. In the end Kyungseo settles for a honeydew-green tea ice combo, and Junmi gets her vanilla milkshake.
“To be honest, I’m still not sure what you meant last night, the whole wanting to rediscover music,” Kyungseo admits later, when they both have gotten their treats, Junmi sipping at her milkshake while Kyungseo takes huge scoops of her ice cream.
“It’s my turn to be honest,” Junmi says around the straw, swallowing a mouthful of milkshake before she continues, her temples throbbing in pain because of the cold. “I don’t remember much of last night,”
Junmi watches for any and all reaction on Kyungseo’s face, but the other girl remains neutral, looking down at her ice cream briefly before looking back to Junmi, a mischievous shine in her eyes, lips curled into a smile as she eats some more ice cream.
“Thought so,” Kyungseo reveals, grinning.
“Then why didn’t you say anything?” Junmi splutters, cheeks heating up as she speaks, yet unable to look away from Kyungseo’s eyes.
“I don’t know,” Kyungseo shrugs, her bangs falling into her eyes. She’s quick to brush it back. Junmi’s fingers itches. “You told me some things yesterday that I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t have told me if you were sober, even if I don’t know you that well. You just don’t seem like the type to reveal those type of things to a stranger.”
“What kinds of things?” Junmi asks quickly, ears burning, wondering just what she told Kyungseo.
“It doesn’t matter since you don’t remember,” Kyungseo says, waving her hand. However, she’s still smiling as she scoops more green tea ice with her spoon.
“Tell me, Kyungseo!” Junmi whines before she manages to think, embarrassment settling deeply into her bones.
“Cute,” Kyungseo murmurs around her spoon. “Well we talked about music mostly, you told me about your time in this church choir, but we also talked about other things.”
“What kinds of things?” Junmi repeats hotly, squirming in her seat.
“Things I thought you, as a church girl, didn’t talk about,” Kyungseo says, eyes dark, ominous.
Junmi swallows. It’s not like she has any dark secrets hidden except for the fact that she left her hometown, church, friends, family because she felt like she didn’t belong there, she needed to change. But even if Kyungseo knows that, Junmi doesn’t mind. It’s not a secret she tries actively to keep hidden. If people ask her, that’s what she’s going to tell them.
“The part about me moving because I didn’t feel like church was the right thing for me?” Junmi tries, speaking in quiet tones. The ice cream bar isn’t filled with people, and there’s really nothing for her to be ashamed of, but she talks low, just in case.
Kyungseo shakes her head, licking her spoon.
“That I grew up with very protective parents and had to keep my sexuality hidden?” Junmi asks boldly, knowing her cheeks are red at this point.
Her sexuality, her liking girls, is no secret anymore. It used to be, it had been, but she’s open about it now. It’s not like she’s flaunting it, telling everybody about it, but if people were to ask, she’d tell them. Minchae had guessed it herself, and so had Yixin, but Junmi wasn’t embarrassed about it.
“You told me - in detail - how much you liked me,” Kyungseo says after a while, voice even.
Junmi’s body flushes.
“It’s not like- I would never- I don’t even like you- I-“
Alcohol was bad, it made you do bad things, make your sense of judgement poor, made you a raving lunatic. True, Junmi wouldn’t mind having Kyungseo between her legs, but there was no way she’d tell her, especially since they met less than 24 hours ago.
“Hey, hey Junmi please calm down!”
Kyungseo is suddenly next to her, one hand cupping her face, the other one on her knee. Her eyes, lined with eyeliner are huge, worried as she tells Junmi to breathe. She picks up Junmi’s hand with her own, placing it on Kyungseo’s chest.
“Breathe with me,” Kyungseo says firmly, and Junmi does.
Kyungseo follows her back to her dorm, bids her goodbye and leaves her there, outside her dorm. The walk home had been silent, and Junmi isn’t sure if she imagined the coldness coming from Kyungseo. After Junmi had calmed down, they had paid and left. Kyungseo had wordlessly taken her home.
Maybe she screwed it all up. Just a day into their friendship, Junmi had screwed it all up.
She remains outside for hours, sitting at the bench by the doors. She doesn’t even know why she’s feeling so upset, so broken.
Minchae finds her on the bench, the wide grin naturally on her face quickly fades away from her face when she comes close enough to see the expression on Junmi’s face, or the lack thereof. Minchae’s hands, words are all soft as she asks if everything is okay.
Junmi doesn’t even care, spills it all as Minchae hugs her. Telling her how quickly she has fallen for Kyungseo, even though she barely knows her. She just knew, last night.
Junmi tells Minchae everything.
That night, Junmi sleeps between Minchae and Lu Hua, warmth all around her as they stroke her hair, tells her it’ll be okay.
To: Kyungseo
mon. 02 sept. 7:30 am.
Hi.
To: Kyungseo
mon. 02. Sept. 4: 56 pm.
Can we talk?
Junmi sends Kyungseo ten more texts. Kyungseo doesn’t reply to any of them.
Two weeks later, Taeeun flits into her vision like a house cat. Freshman week is over long ago, but Junmi is still friends with her helpers Hayeon, Taeeun and Yixin, as well as Minchae, Lu Hua, Chanyi and Hongmin. Junmi is standing by her locker, collecting her books for her next class: children’s psychology, when Taeeun approaches her, still as tall and looming as ever.
“Do you have any plans tonight?” Taeeun asks promptly, hands shoved into the pockets of her sweatpants as she speaks.
“No, not really?” Junmi asks. She had done all the reading for next week’s classes, and with it being Friday, she had no plans other than to relax, maybe hang out with her friends.
“We - Hayeon, Minchae, Yixin and I - are going to this club tonight, and we were wondering if you wanted to come?”
“Sure,” Junmi says at once, smiling. Going clubbing was something she hadn’t done in a while. Usually they just crashed at Hayeon and Taeeun’s, playing video games or watching movies. It would be refreshing for a change.
Taeeun smiles.
“Good evening, we’re The New London Fire,” Kyungseo greets from her place on the stage, crowd cheering, and Junmi promptly chokes on her drink.
She’s as beautiful as Junmi remembers her; even more in fact, looking almost ethereal in the stage light. Kyungseo is wearing a dress tonight, a black one that reaches to her mid-thigh. Junmi’s heart jumps. She’s wearing the same pair of stockings that she had been wearing on their date. Junmi isn’t sure if that’s the proper word to describe it.
As they play through the first two songs, Junmi tries to look everywhere else than at Kyungseo, switching between cheering for Yixin and glaring at Minchae and Hayeon who smiles at her. Taeeun looks indifferent as always, but Junmi finds that assuring and even preferable to the other two.
“But Junmi-ah,” Minchae drawls, wrapping one arm around Junmi’s shoulder as she speaks, croons. “We just want you two to make up and be friends. It sucks since we’re sort of in the same social circle, and you two aren’t talking.”
“I tried to talk to her, remember?” Junmi grumbles, trying and failing to shake Minchae’s arm off her shoulder. “It didn’t go that well.”
“This time, eonni had had a finger or two in the game,” Hayeon chirps from the other side of Junmi, squeezing her thigh.
Junmi grumbles lowly about sneaky friends tricking their younger friends.
As The New London Fire launches into their cover of Smashing Pumpkin’s Tonight Tonight, Junmi knows she’s in it too deep. She’s not sure if it’s the song, the band, or if it’s just Kyungseo. Junmi is in love. Maybe it’s vain, superficial, but all Junmi knows is that she can feel it in her bones, tugging at her heartstrings.
She knows the lyrics, now - she’s able to sing along to every word Kyungseo sings. Her iTunes library is updated, replaced with new - other artists. Junmi loves it.
They play seven songs before they get off the stage, and this time, Junmi is the fastest one off her stool, draining her drink in one go before she walks quickly towards the backstage area and the dressing rooms, with Minchae and Hayeon’s cat calls behind her.
Wonshik, who apparently works part time as a backstage security guy, lets her through at once, winking at her. Hongmin is by his side, in his arms, smiling at Junmi.
“Good luck!” she says, batting her heavy eyelashes at Junmi before patting her butt, telling her that they’re in room three.
It seems like everyone but Junmi knows what’s going on tonight, Junmi muses as she almost run down the hall.
In room three she meets Yixin and Chanyi, sitting on the big leather couch that takes up half of the space in the room. They’re both hunched over Chanyi’s phone, laughing at something.
“Hi Junmi-ah!” Yixin greets, dimpling as she smiles a glittery smile.
“Eonni! Long time, no see,” Chanyi beams, flailing her arms in a greeting.
“Have you seen Kyungseo?” Junmi asks promptly.
Yixin looks quickly through the dressing room, searching. “No, I think she left already?”
Chanyi drops her phone on her way up, tumbling over the couch, all long limbs and enthusiasm. “If she left, she literally just left. You can still catch her. Use the backstage door, hurry!”
Of course Chanyi is in on this as well. Yixin probably is too; she’s just too absentminded to remember. Junmi thanks them, and runs. The backstage exit door is close, and she pushes it open and runs out into the slight drizzling rain.
Junmi isn’t quite sure what she wants to achieve by doing this, but she knows that she has to. Something inside her wills her to continue as she runs down the streets, nervousness coiling in her tummy as she runs down the road she assumes Kyungseo has gone.
And she is right. As she turns around a corner, she sees Kyungseo’s frame. Junmi calls her name, but Kyungseo doesn’t turn to look. Maybe she didn’t hear her, maybe she did. Nevertheless, Junmi runs until she catches up with her, grabbing her shoulder to make her stop.
“Kyungseo,” Junmi pants, out of breath. “Please- Just- Just listen to me?”
Kyungseo’s stone face could give Taeeun a run for her money.
“I’m not sure why you’re mad at me, but after thinking through our conversation at the ice cream bar, I’ve concluded with that it’s because I said I didn’t like you, and that’s-“
“I’m not mad at you,” Kyungseo says tonelessly, shrugging Junmi’s hand off her shoulder.
“You’re not?”
Kyungseo shakes her head. “No. I might have overreacted a little, and I’m sorry about that. It’s just- Rejection have been a huge part of my life. And every time someone rejects me, I think I’ve become a little better at handling it, a little better at not freaking out, a little better at not crying, but it always backfires.”
“Wait, what?”
“Long story short: my parents rejected me, my family rejected me, my university of choice rejected me, and you did too.” Kyungseo says flatly, looking away.
“No look, Kyungseo I-“
She shakes her head again, bangs slightly wet, falling into her eyes. Her eyeliner is slightly smudged, purple eyeshadow rubbed out over her eyelids. “It’s okay Junmi. Just give me some time and we can maybe start being friends? I just need to-“
Junmi, frustrated and annoyed, Junmi hopelessly in love, leans forward and presses Kyungseo’s lips against hers. It’s fireworks, butterflies and everything she’s ever read about, and better. The kiss itself only lasts for a brief second, but to Junmi it’s the best second in her life.
“Please just listen to me, ok?” Junmi says quickly, and Kyungseo nods numbly at her. “I like you, okay. I like you a lot, but the thing is: I’ve never been anyone’s girlfriend before. I don’t know how to be anyone’s girlfriend, but I’m willing to try, for you, for us, so please just- give me a chance?”
A soft, gentle smile meets Junmi, and it makes the butterflies go berserk; her entire body is tingling. It’s Kyungseo’s turn to kiss Junmi- then, and this time, Kyungseo’s hands is linking with hers, and wow, Junmi feels like she’s floating on a cloud.
“I’ll give you a chance, if you’ll give me a chance,” Kyungseo says softly.
And as the rain falls down on them, Junmi kisses Kyungseo again.
Junmi learns on their second date that she’s a year older than Kyungseo, and even though she tells Kyungseo that it’s ok, she can just call Junmi by her name, something hot curls in her torso when Kyungseo calls her ”Junmi eonni”.
Junmi and Kyungseo goes on four more dates before they make it official. On their fifth date - a Fall Out Boy concert - Junmi asks Kyungseo to be her girlfriend. They make it official as they share a banana milkshake on the last train home, Kyungseo posting a pic of their entwined fingers on her Instagram.
Four weeks later, after their picnic date was interrupted by rain, Junmi finally gets to see Kyungseo’s flat. They’re out eating in a park close to where Kyungseo lives, and as they run squealing through the rain, Kyungseo drags Junmi to her place.
Junmi shuffles silently behind Kyungseo, throwing glances around them as Kyungseo leads her through her tiny two-room studio apartment.
It's neat, clean; a stark contrast to Junmi's own dorm room, that looks like a town where a bomb has gone off and nobody really bothered to rebuild it. Minchae always has a stroke when she visits.
Like other student flats, Kyungseo's is sparsely decorated. A twin sized bed is tucked into the upper left corner, a love seat and two mix matched chairs in the upper right, with a small kitchen in the bottom right. The door that presumably leads to the bathroom is located between the loveseat and the kitchen.
Junmi's eyes are fixated on Kyungseo's feet, the way her wet stockings makes little wet imprints on the wooden floor. She watches, enraptured as tiny droplets of water from Kyungseo's skirt, her black, braided hair, hits the floor silently.
Kyungseo's bathroom is small, too. The floor consists of navy blue tiles, the walls are tiled with white. There's a toilet, a sink and to Junmi's big surprise - someone have managed to fit a bathtub in there.
Color blossoms in Junmi's cheeks, the tip of her ears as she notices Kyungseo stripping out of her wet skirt and t-shirt. Her black bra and panties follow shortly, and Junmi swears she's not staring.
Shamelessly, Kyungseo turns halfway to throw a glance at Junmi before busing herself with filling the tub with water. She hums under her breath as she adjusts the temperature, opening a bunch of bottles, smelling them all before she chooses one, squirting some of the content into the water.
Junmi watches as Kyungseo settles in the tub, swallows loudly when Kyungseo turns to look at her. Kyungseo rises an eyebrow at her. Junmi squirms.
They’ve never taken things this far before. They have had their fair share of heavy makeout sessions in Junmi’s room, curled up on her bed, but they have always agreed on taking it slow, seeing how their relationship would unfold.
Lately, after Junmi got a bit eager and shoved her hands down Kyungseo’s pants during a particularly heated makeout session and then proceeded to run out of there to hide in Minchae’s room until Kyungseo told her that we don’t have to do anything eonni. We’re doing this our way.
Until now.
She's dripping all over Kyungseo's tiled bathroom floor. Not that it seems to bother Kyungseo.
She feels exposed, terribly so, as she stands by the door in Kyungseo's bathroom. It's ridiculous, Junmi knows, because she's still fully dressed, wearing her drenched clothes, whereas Kyungseo is stark naked. Yet Junmi feels as exposed as Kyungseo looks.
Junmi shudders at the feeling
"Aren't you coming?" Kyungseo asks in a voice that's too soft for the hard look in her eyes. Junmi's hands are trembling as she lifts them. She manages to pop open two buttons on her button down before her arms fall limply to her side.
Junmi's eyes fall from Kyungseo's face to look at her own socked feet. She's wearing her comfort socks today - the ones with Daisy Duck's face splayed over her toes. This wasn't really on her to-do list today. She's not dressed for this. Not dressed sexily, just dressed for a casual date.
A silence falls over the room and Junmi's gaze remains on her socks, wiggling her toes nervously in the cotton blend. She fists the hem of her shirt in her hands. It's white, her pants black, and since it's Sunday, she's technically dressed for church, even though she's not intended to go. After all these years it's still an habit.
The soft sounds of water makes Junmi look up from Daisy Duck, and she finds herself immediately regretting that choice, as Kyungseo's naked body fills her vision. She's lovely, as Junmi had expected.
Kyungseo is softer, rounder than Junmi is. Her pale skin curves wonderfully into her small waist, and then out around her curvy hips. Her long, black hair is braided in one thick braid that falls over her left shoulder.
Junmi's gaze falls to Kyungseo's full breasts, her nipples perked due to the slight cool of the room. As she lets her gaze trail over Kyungseo's slender tummy, Junmi feels her cheeks, ears burn with embarrassment. Eventually, her gaze falls to the soft curls between Kyungsoo's legs. Or the hair she had expected to be there. There's none. Kyungseo is completely bare.
Junmi finds herself blushing even more, even though she's not sure why. There's no big deal about naked girls; but this is Kyungseo. This is different than seeing a random classmate naked in the showers after phys ed.
She looks absolutely wonderful, and Junmi feels more out of place now than she did just seconds earlier. Junmi watches in awe as Kyungseo steps, naked, out of the bathtub.
As she crosses the floor, walking the short distance between the bathtub and Junmi, her feet leave small, wet pools in their wake. Kyungseo doesn't seem to distraught by the wetness on her bathroom tiles.
"Junmi eonni" Kyungseo says, her wet hands coming up to pluck at the buttons of Junmi's shirt. The water seeps quickly into Junmi's cotton shirt, leaving it see-through. Kyungseo's eyes remains focused on Junmi's as she unbuttons Junmi's shirt, slowly, one button at a time.
She's trembling under Kyungseo's touch. Kyungseo can probably feel it, but if she does, she doesn't say anything, focuses on keeping Junmi's gaze as she unbuttons the shirt. The coolness of the bathroom becomes more clear to her when Kyungseo is done unbuttoning her shirt. Her skin is all gooseflesh. It doesn't help that Kyungseo raises her hands, pushing Junmi's shirt away from her shoulders, leaving her in her white lacy bra and pants.
"You're so cute, eonni." Kyungseo's voice is soft as silk when she speaks. Her hands dwell on Junmi's shoulders for a moment before she trails them down her front, pausing over the soft swell of Junmi's breasts.
Junmi squeezes her eyes shut as Kyungseo's small hands cup them through her bra. Kyungseo chuckles breathily, but lets go, only to trail the soft pads of her fingers down Junmi's tummy - which she tucks a bit in by inhaling sharply - until Kyungseo reaches the hem of Junmi's pants.
"Okay?"
Kyungseo doesn't specify more than that, but Junmi understand what she means. Not trusting her voice, Junmi only nods quickly, still forcing her eyes shut. With practiced ease, or so it seems, Kyungseo pops the button to Junmi's pants, then promptly pulls them down her thighs, tapping Junmi's ankles to get her to lift her feet, one at a time. Kyungseo removes Junmi's Daisy Duck socks as well, leaving Junmi in only her underwear.
She turns her back on Junmi, then, heading back to the tub, pausing briefly to look at Junmi over her bare shoulder, gaze heavy. Junmi shudders visibly, and she doesn't miss the soft smirk playing on Kyungseo's lips before she turns her head, sinks back into the bubbles.
Junmi bites her bottom lip, a thousand thoughts running through her head at once. Kyungseo isn't looking at her, not directly, too busy adding more bits of her bath bombs into the tub, making the water bubblier, adding more color.
"You don't have to, if you don't want to, eonni," Kyungseo says, throwing a quick glance in Junmi's general direction before she busies herself with the bath bombs again. She has got dozens of them in a plastic box next to the tub.
And Junmi does, she wants. It's just, if she decides to do this, if she decides to bath with Kyungseo, then, that's it. For Junmi it's not about taking a bath with another girl. It's about deciding, coming to terms with who she is. It's not as if she's going to declare it to the world, but it's about telling herself, making sure, knowing herself. Finally taking that last, final step.
Junmi wants this. Junmi wants Kyungseo.
Her eyes are fixed on the blue tiles of the floor as she unhooks her lacy, white bra, tosses it carefully over to where Kyungseo had placed her folded clothes. She uses some more time getting the panties off. They're white too, lacy, just like the bra.
Kyungseo is still not looking at her, which both fuels and soothes the nervousness running through her body. Junmi isn't sure if she's disappointed that Kyungseo isn't looking at her, because despite her hesitation; she wants Kyungseo to want her.
When Junmi finally, finally is naked, she crosses the tiled floor in a hurry, quickly sinks down in the hot water. She gasps because it's hot, to the point where it almost feels like it's burning. , the soft waves of the water as she settles feels like small licks from a flame, claiming her body.
Nervousness settles fully in her bones as she tries to get comfortable, wiggling so the water almost spills over the edge, soaking Kyungseo's fish-shaped carpet. She can't really put words to why she's nervous, why she's behaving differently. It's not like she's introverted, shy. Junmi doesn't recognize herself at all.
"Eonni." Out of a sudden, Kyungseo is there, grabbing Junmi by her wrists, tugging, pulling and fumbling until Junmi is seated in between Kyungseo’s legs, her back pressed against Kyungseo’s front. It would be a tight fit, but Kyungseo's tub is on the big side, and they're both short.
“Okay?” Kyungseo asks again, careful and understanding as she curls her arms around Junmi’s waist, pressing her fingers into Junmi’s soft skin.
“Please,” Junmi says breathlessly, heart pounding in her ears as her thighs tremble. Junmi needs this, needs Kyungseo. Out of habit more than anything else, she leans back against Kyungseo’s shoulder, nuzzling her face into Kyungseo’s neck, pressing a kiss to Kyungseo’s pulse point.
Kyungseo lets out a breathy whisper of Junmi’s name.
They have talked about this a lot, often.
So when Kyungseo’s hand slides down her tummy, through the soft curls between Junmi’s legs, it’s not a big surprise. Junmi still gasps at the sensation, her hands finding Kyungseo’s thighs, using them as leverage to stay in the moment.
One finger - Kyungseo’s middle finger - slips through Junmi’s lips, down to her core. Gently, carefully, Kyungseo lets her index and ring finger spread her open as her middle finger comes back up to circle around Junmi’s clit.
“You’re so wet already, eonni,” Kyungseo whispers, lips dry against Junmi’s forehead as she speaks. A strangled noise escapes through Junmi’s mouth.
Kyungseo thumbs at Junmi’s clit, middle finger trailing down to slip into her. Junmi hisses, bucks against Kyungseo’s hands, pressing her face against Kyungseo’s skin as pleasure burn in her veins.
She’s not new to touching herself like this, not new to the sensation itself, but it feels so different when it’s Kyungseo who touches her, Kyungseo who’s making her feel good. It sends her nerves, body haywire, blood pounding in her ears as Kyungseo slips her index finger into her as well, fucking them in and out of Junmi in a decent pace.
Kyungseo’s other hand comes down between Junmi’s legs as well, and starts rubbing gently on her clit, thumb trailing in circles around it, touching but still not touching enough.
“Do you touch yourself like this, eonni?” Kyungseo asks, voice low, sultry, and Junmi hisses. “Am I touching you enough, am I being good?”
“Yes, yes, yes just- Kyungseo-“ Junmi pants as she feels that familiar warmth burn in her thighs. She plants her feet against the porcelain tub, bucking up against Kyungseo’s hands, fucking herself on Kyungseo’s fingers as she comes. Her legs, body is trembling with the force of her orgasm as she curls in on herself, legs tightening around Kyungseo’s hands, her teeth sinks into Kyungseo’s skin.
A minute, an eternity later, when the white noise has left her ears, her vision back to being clear, Junmi turns, albeit a bit shakily, to face Kyungseo.
“Was it good, eonni?” Kyungseo asks, biting at her bottom lip as Junmi cups her face, kisses her instead of putting words to her feelings, she’s set on pouring them into the kiss, sucking and nipping at Kyungseo’s lips until she’s out of breath.
Kyungseo’s face is beautiful, cheeks and chest flushed with a lovely pink color. Junmi wants her so badly.
“Kyungseo, I want-“ Junmi begins, tugging at Kyungseo’s legs. “Let me eat you out.”
“Yes,” Kyungseo speaks on an exhale, climbs to her legs as she settles on the edge of the bathtub, feet spread as Junmi settles between her legs, nosing at the softness of her inner thighs, arms coming up to grab firmly onto warm skin, making sure her legs stay separated.
“Junmi eonni,” Kyungseo gasps as Junmi nuzzles on the soft, bare skin of her sex, mouth venturing lower, sucking on Kyungseo’s lips before one hand comes to part them, and her mouth easily finds her clit.
Kyungseo is noisy, Junmi quickly learns as she slips a finger into her girlfriend, settling a quick, firm pace as she curls her tongue around her clit, sucking noisily at it, wet noises filling the room along with Kyungseo’s moan.
“Oh, please,” Kyungseo moans, her fingers scrambling into Junmi’s hair. Hesitantly, but assumingly unconsciously, Kyungseo grinds against Junmi’s face as Junmi works determinately to make her fall apart.
Kyungseo is sweet, musky on her tongue, and Junmi feels herself getting aroused again because of Kyungseo’s sweet, pleasured whines. She’s hot, throbbing again between her legs, and she guides one hand between her legs, heel of her hand rubbing circles over her clit as she gets Kyungseo off.
Junmi inserts another finger, curling them into Kyungseo’s heat.
She shouts Junmi’s name as she comes, thighs trembling on either side of Junmi’s face as Junmi works her through her orgasm, body shaking. Junmi follows her shortly, letting her second orgasm claim her already tired body.
Kyungseo bends down to kiss herself off Junmi’s lips, lick her taste off Junmi’s tongue, lets Junmi coax her back into the colorful water as they kiss.
Junmi entwines their fingers, seating herself in Kyungseo’s lap as she kisses her sweetly. As she pulls away, she leans her forehead against Kyungseo’s, still wanting to be close, to feel Kyungseo’s body against her own.
“Okay?”
“Okay.”
This is my first girlfic ever ^v^. Comments are always appreciated.
ask.fm