sleep debt is a bitch.
o_O
My world is so fucked-up feeling. The past 2 days I've gotten exactly 2 hours of sleep before getting up for school, and I've had to take naps in the evenings. Today's - well, yesterday's - nap went from 5:30 PM to 2:30 AM. I feel so confused and out of it!
I thought of staying in bed since I have to be up at 7 anyway - I go to the gastrointerologist finally. I need to find and finish the forms for that, speaking of it. Mom has a pre-surgery (for her carpal tunnel :X it's next Tuesday) physical at 10 on the other end of town, and then I have class at 11, so it'll be a fun 2 hours of running about and driving for poor Smeg.
It was a cold and rainy day today, but I was prepared. I must mention my outfit 'cos it rocked:
- Grey long-sleeved shirt
- Black SUEDE t-shirt featuring the first album cover (2 girls kissing in sepia tones) that I bought for $20 on eBay last week because I'm lame BUT IT'S AWESOME
- Black fuzzy fedora to keep the rain off my face
- Silver guitar earrings
- Black leggings topped with black cabled legwarmers
- Rainbow ankle socks
- Black clogs
- Short black ruffled miniskirt
- Uberlong colorfully striped scarf
I looked awesome. Not very colorful, but completely awesome and still kind of gay! Yes, that's right, it was National Coming Out Day -- at least, it was at school. I had to miss it so I could attend class, but I got in for the last 25 minutes and as soon as I walked into the student center, I heard this man BELTING OUT "Baby One More Time." I went to the little pit-where-all-this-shit-occurs and Dessy appeared a few minutes later and I'm like WTF?? WTF??? It made no sense. It was this bald student with a 'Taste My Rainbow' shirt singing (hollering) to a backing track. WHY?
Some people made speeches after that, and then this tall black guy had to sing a little number called "I Believe I Can Fly." That was crap, too. Seriously. And when the thing was over, I went down to talk to Kit and some other people (didn't know their names) and I bought a giant pride flag. Yes. I don't know what I'm going to do with it - it's the size of my union jack flag and completely awesome. However, I think I'd have to come out to put it up, although I can't decide if my parents are daft enough to not even get what rainbow flags mean. It could also be used as the final piece that makes it dawn on them that their kid's a queer. I have no clue. I'll just hide it for a while until I decide what course I want to take. Anyway, you don't have to get me one for Xmas now! I have my rainbow pride flag. :D
AND A LADY SAW MY SUEDE SHIRT AND SHE WAS LIKE 'I USED TO LOVE THEM! I HAVE 3 OF THEIR ALBUMS! "METAL MICKEY" IS A GREAT SONG!' AND I'M LIKE OMG!!!!!!!11 BECAUSE I'M STUPID BUT IT WAS AWESOME!!!!11 And these 2 girls who I think are twins but I always thought they were a lesbian couple because I'm really stupid liked it, too. :D :D :D
Nothing else happened of note. I hung out with the usual coffee kids and laughed at Andrea's music because i'm a horrible person. I can't HELP it - Nine Inch Nails cracks me up, and some other thing made me laugh for an inordinately long time, too, but I can't remember it now. I look like an insane person, I imagine. Then Dessy and I went off to class, where my teacher told us about her Native American family history. She's related to a bunch of assholes who were all h8n' on the Indians yet they were Indian themselves. It was weird. And I turned in the little project thing we had due today, so that was good.
Then Smeg picked me up and we stopped at Kmart to pick up Mom who'd gotten her hair cut and frosted with blonde again, and then stopped at k0hlb0rg so I could look for my Ana Matronic dress. No luck, but I got a very very soft tunic-length sweater that's thick black and white stripes! I'm not sure where to look for the dress - I need a knee-length or just below black dress with a single knotted shoulder strap. It's pretty basic, but it's what I see Ana wearing most often and it's definitely easier than trying to rustle up random pieces that will make me look suitably flamboyant. I've got all the accessories I need, I think.
I should probably go downstairs and eat something. I haven't had anything since a small packet of Twizzlers this afternoon. :X
I'm up to 40 friends on LJ now! Some are duplicate names (y'all crazy - no, I have 2 duplicate names so don't worry about it) and some are new people. And some are old people. ;D
Nnrnrghrgh. My whole world is all messed up with this sleeping schedule that sucks! I have a huge heap of clothes on my floor that I'm too lazy to hang back up, and I have a bunch of laundry to do and the bathroom needs cleaning again. I also have to find 2 poems for class on Thursday - oral interpretation - one of which will be mine, but I don't know what to do for the other. Song lyrics? Emily Dickinson? Edgar Allan Poe? I'll look around tomorrow evening cos I'm too tired to care right now.
Oh, Siiiimon. I love this song and I sent it to Chesh the other night cos she hadn't heard it since her last computer crash and she pointed out how ABSOLUTELY HORRIFICALLY SAD it is because Brett wrote it about a friend of his who committed suicide and so I was sitting there crying and I hope I don't cry now but it's SAD. :( I don't know how I didn't pick up on it before - I guess the backup vocals distracted me because they're fun to sing. It's a gorgeous song, though. And so is "The 2 Of Us" which is another Suede song that makes me cry if I'm in a fragile mood, and "High Rising" almost always gets me tearful when he sings, "Your mind will find another, and that's where the days have gone..." Oh, Brett, you shatter my heart.
Okay, time for that food and stuff now. I'm really fucking cold, though. I shall probably go back to bed soon and hopefully I can get some sleep and not be dead-tired tomorrow!! I can't keep wasting away my days, but I feel all shitty and sickly and this is why I have about 1000 doctor's appointments this month. I start physical therapy for my knee next week, in addition to all the specialist visits, and I'm really sick of the pain kicking in once the Naproxen wears off and me having to limp around like House, so that's good.
Durp.
J.
My world is so fucked-up feeling. The past 2 days I've gotten exactly 2 hours of sleep before getting up for school, and I've had to take naps in the evenings. Today's - well, yesterday's - nap went from 5:30 PM to 2:30 AM. I feel so confused and out of it!
I thought of staying in bed since I have to be up at 7 anyway - I go to the gastrointerologist finally. I need to find and finish the forms for that, speaking of it. Mom has a pre-surgery (for her carpal tunnel :X it's next Tuesday) physical at 10 on the other end of town, and then I have class at 11, so it'll be a fun 2 hours of running about and driving for poor Smeg.
It was a cold and rainy day today, but I was prepared. I must mention my outfit 'cos it rocked:
- Grey long-sleeved shirt
- Black SUEDE t-shirt featuring the first album cover (2 girls kissing in sepia tones) that I bought for $20 on eBay last week because I'm lame BUT IT'S AWESOME
- Black fuzzy fedora to keep the rain off my face
- Silver guitar earrings
- Black leggings topped with black cabled legwarmers
- Rainbow ankle socks
- Black clogs
- Short black ruffled miniskirt
- Uberlong colorfully striped scarf
I looked awesome. Not very colorful, but completely awesome and still kind of gay! Yes, that's right, it was National Coming Out Day -- at least, it was at school. I had to miss it so I could attend class, but I got in for the last 25 minutes and as soon as I walked into the student center, I heard this man BELTING OUT "Baby One More Time." I went to the little pit-where-all-this-shit-occurs and Dessy appeared a few minutes later and I'm like WTF?? WTF??? It made no sense. It was this bald student with a 'Taste My Rainbow' shirt singing (hollering) to a backing track. WHY?
Some people made speeches after that, and then this tall black guy had to sing a little number called "I Believe I Can Fly." That was crap, too. Seriously. And when the thing was over, I went down to talk to Kit and some other people (didn't know their names) and I bought a giant pride flag. Yes. I don't know what I'm going to do with it - it's the size of my union jack flag and completely awesome. However, I think I'd have to come out to put it up, although I can't decide if my parents are daft enough to not even get what rainbow flags mean. It could also be used as the final piece that makes it dawn on them that their kid's a queer. I have no clue. I'll just hide it for a while until I decide what course I want to take. Anyway, you don't have to get me one for Xmas now! I have my rainbow pride flag. :D
AND A LADY SAW MY SUEDE SHIRT AND SHE WAS LIKE 'I USED TO LOVE THEM! I HAVE 3 OF THEIR ALBUMS! "METAL MICKEY" IS A GREAT SONG!' AND I'M LIKE OMG!!!!!!!11 BECAUSE I'M STUPID BUT IT WAS AWESOME!!!!11 And these 2 girls who I think are twins but I always thought they were a lesbian couple because I'm really stupid liked it, too. :D :D :D
Nothing else happened of note. I hung out with the usual coffee kids and laughed at Andrea's music because i'm a horrible person. I can't HELP it - Nine Inch Nails cracks me up, and some other thing made me laugh for an inordinately long time, too, but I can't remember it now. I look like an insane person, I imagine. Then Dessy and I went off to class, where my teacher told us about her Native American family history. She's related to a bunch of assholes who were all h8n' on the Indians yet they were Indian themselves. It was weird. And I turned in the little project thing we had due today, so that was good.
Then Smeg picked me up and we stopped at Kmart to pick up Mom who'd gotten her hair cut and frosted with blonde again, and then stopped at k0hlb0rg so I could look for my Ana Matronic dress. No luck, but I got a very very soft tunic-length sweater that's thick black and white stripes! I'm not sure where to look for the dress - I need a knee-length or just below black dress with a single knotted shoulder strap. It's pretty basic, but it's what I see Ana wearing most often and it's definitely easier than trying to rustle up random pieces that will make me look suitably flamboyant. I've got all the accessories I need, I think.
I should probably go downstairs and eat something. I haven't had anything since a small packet of Twizzlers this afternoon. :X
I'm up to 40 friends on LJ now! Some are duplicate names (y'all crazy - no, I have 2 duplicate names so don't worry about it) and some are new people. And some are old people. ;D
Nnrnrghrgh. My whole world is all messed up with this sleeping schedule that sucks! I have a huge heap of clothes on my floor that I'm too lazy to hang back up, and I have a bunch of laundry to do and the bathroom needs cleaning again. I also have to find 2 poems for class on Thursday - oral interpretation - one of which will be mine, but I don't know what to do for the other. Song lyrics? Emily Dickinson? Edgar Allan Poe? I'll look around tomorrow evening cos I'm too tired to care right now.
Oh, Siiiimon. I love this song and I sent it to Chesh the other night cos she hadn't heard it since her last computer crash and she pointed out how ABSOLUTELY HORRIFICALLY SAD it is because Brett wrote it about a friend of his who committed suicide and so I was sitting there crying and I hope I don't cry now but it's SAD. :( I don't know how I didn't pick up on it before - I guess the backup vocals distracted me because they're fun to sing. It's a gorgeous song, though. And so is "The 2 Of Us" which is another Suede song that makes me cry if I'm in a fragile mood, and "High Rising" almost always gets me tearful when he sings, "Your mind will find another, and that's where the days have gone..." Oh, Brett, you shatter my heart.
Okay, time for that food and stuff now. I'm really fucking cold, though. I shall probably go back to bed soon and hopefully I can get some sleep and not be dead-tired tomorrow!! I can't keep wasting away my days, but I feel all shitty and sickly and this is why I have about 1000 doctor's appointments this month. I start physical therapy for my knee next week, in addition to all the specialist visits, and I'm really sick of the pain kicking in once the Naproxen wears off and me having to limp around like House, so that's good.
Durp.
J.