Life is the most difficult strategy game ever. It has its bumpy rides, most of them one cannot even quit. *sigh* You shocked me 'cos I assumed - what a selfish human feeling - that all the people I know and consider as members of my friends circle don't have such sad and complicated issues. I always thought it that it was only me. Shame. Rob, I'm sorry for this dark period in your life. I wish I could help you. We don't know each other much, but I always considered you as a smart, loveable and intelligent guy. Never occured to me that you could have failures.
While reading your entry, I kept nodding at several parts, knowing the feeling/situation you described. But - as I already said above - I thought it was only me, and everyone else is having a normal life. I know the feeling of being lost, not knowing where to head with my life very much. I'm still battling with it, and I don1t think I will be able to get rid of it soon. I have my own barriers in life (money, family, certifications etc)that trap me in a situation I can't refer to as where I really would like to be. I have a job, a flat, some money to cover the annual travels to the UK, my mum's love, but still I don't feel satisfaction. I can't figure out what I really would like to do as I'm tied to this damn reality. All I know is that I haven't found my place yet. I'm not where I should be, not doing what could make me happy, but I can't do anything to help about this situation. Family and school/work issues pushed me into a severe depression too, ending up with huge lack of self-confidence and in a web of fears and phobias. So -just like you - I feel fine when going to the cons. Those few events are the highlight of my years, keeping me sane and going. I spare for them all year long. When I'm at cons, I'm a totally different girl with more self-confidence and free of stress and real life issues. I'm thankful to all those people - including you and the others - for making me feel accepted and loved, it means a lot to me.
I'm glad you have Jemz. You two seem to love each other very much, so I doubt she would agree to break-up cos you think it'd be better for her. Reading your lines, I have the feeling that she loves you more than that. I'm sure that not having her around is terrible for you now. when are you seeing her again? I think having her in your life is better than not having her at all. She is your so-called saviour after all. So if she wants to stay in this relationship with you no matter what, accept her decision and be happy for it. This long-distance relationship mustn't be easy, but who knows what tomorrow brings? :)
I so hope everything will work out for you soon. You are in my prayers.
Life is the most difficult strategy game ever. It has its bumpy rides, most of them one cannot even quit.
*sigh* You shocked me 'cos I assumed - what a selfish human feeling - that all the people I know and consider as members of my friends circle don't have such sad and complicated issues. I always thought it that it was only me. Shame.
Rob, I'm sorry for this dark period in your life. I wish I could help you. We don't know each other much, but I always considered you as a smart, loveable and intelligent guy. Never occured to me that you could have failures.
While reading your entry, I kept nodding at several parts, knowing the feeling/situation you described. But - as I already said above - I thought it was only me, and everyone else is having a normal life.
I know the feeling of being lost, not knowing where to head with my life very much. I'm still battling with it, and I don1t think I will be able to get rid of it soon. I have my own barriers in life (money, family, certifications etc)that trap me in a situation I can't refer to as where I really would like to be. I have a job, a flat, some money to cover the annual travels to the UK, my mum's love, but still I don't feel satisfaction. I can't figure out what I really would like to do as I'm tied to this damn reality. All I know is that I haven't found my place yet. I'm not where I should be, not doing what could make me happy, but I can't do anything to help about this situation.
Family and school/work issues pushed me into a severe depression too, ending up with huge lack of self-confidence and in a web of fears and phobias. So -just like you - I feel fine when going to the cons. Those few events are the highlight of my years, keeping me sane and going. I spare for them all year long. When I'm at cons, I'm a totally different girl with more self-confidence and free of stress and real life issues. I'm thankful to all those people - including you and the others - for making me feel accepted and loved, it means a lot to me.
I'm glad you have Jemz. You two seem to love each other very much, so I doubt she would agree to break-up cos you think it'd be better for her. Reading your lines, I have the feeling that she loves you more than that.
I'm sure that not having her around is terrible for you now. when are you seeing her again? I think having her in your life is better than not having her at all. She is your so-called saviour after all. So if she wants to stay in this relationship with you no matter what, accept her decision and be happy for it. This long-distance relationship mustn't be easy, but who knows what tomorrow brings? :)
I so hope everything will work out for you soon. You are in my prayers.
See you in May at Hub6?
*huggggggggggs* xxx
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Hopefully be at the Hub, I really need it now more than ever. xxxxxx
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