Maybe life hurts?
I have about 15 minutes before I get off of work. But I'm not looking forward to much. Go home, maybe play a videogame, say some mean stuff back to Rebecca for whatever she will say to me, etc... I feel kinda bad writing this because I look around my friends' entries and all I say is more of the same teenage angst that plagues me, but I have to. If all goes the way I expect things to go, I'll probably be alone by this Friday night. But, who knows, things never work out the I want them to, much less the way I expect them to. By alone I mean Rebecca will have left the apartment, this time for good, even if I begged her to come back the way I did last time, she wouldn't. Which is probably a good thing, because this relationship hasn't caused anyone anything except grief. I hate to say that all the assholes who always said we'd never work were right. It's possible that from here till' Friday we somehow fix things or I pussy out once again, but unlikely, very. I'm not sure what I'm gonna do with the whole "life after Rebecca", but like I said in my last entry (a little less specifically, because I was trying to be nice, you can read Rebecca's LJ to see why I don't care about specifics anymore) I hope it's worth the hell I'm gonna have to go through to break up with her. In any case, wish me the best, and thanks to anyone who reads this not out of curiosity but out of caring. I umm, I guess I should mention that I have this pain on my left side... And I'm not sure what it is. Hope it's not anything serious or anything that will make me quit smoking, because more than likely cigarettes will be the shoulder I cry on when Rebecca leaves. But it won't stop hurting and it hurts so bad every once in a while, that I can't move. I don't know, maybe life hurts? I hope the next image won't royally piss off Rebecca, as I'm trying to keep things semi-working untill Friday. In any case, I'll quote Rebecca and say "I'm sick of holding in everything, if she wants to get mad let her".
I know I do...
I know I do...