(no subject)
This should have been fun. It's all right, I guess.
I'm here at Toe's. Have been here all day. Nobody to talk to or anything. So I've been busying myself with character design using the excellent City of Heroes. There's a tiny bit of "Eh, close enough." But most of it is dead on, scary. So I finally settled on one model's hair. Liberty spikes. ^________~
Ross went for an all-day thing. I followed because the alternative was grim. The carpets were cleaned at 11, and should be dry... right now. I might go back. Sleep. I need a girl to hang out with. I'm getting a bit burnt out on testosterone. Blame my asshole brothers.
They went off insulting my friends for no good reason the other day. I was really hurt and offended. I mean, me, it's fine. I can throw it back, no problem. But them, it's just hurtful and wrong if you ask me. Calling April a bitch and KG a dyke was just... Ugh. I'm moving along. It pisses me off even thinking about it.
I need someone I can just hang out with. I can't even see Amity right now because I need a different type of person. Bao might be close, but she'd be too motherly, and I don't need advice right now. I know what to do, it's just that... well...
Call me pathetic, but I want to feel loved right now.
I will answer two arguments now. "Pity whore!" and "But you are!"
-Yes, I know I'm a pity whore. I'm trying to wean myself off of it, right? But right now, I'm either ready to explode, bored to tears, or just plain tired. My disillusionment with my family, situation, and just life in general is kinda disheartening. I only go to church to see some people, otherwise it's just empty. I want to start smoking again, but A: I'm poor, and B: I can't right now because of circumstances. I'm pretty sure Dad knew exactly what kind of furor telling Mom I smoked would create. He promised me he'd make my life difficult, after all. I'm always hovering on the border, here: Tell them and leave forever, or painfully endure for the sake of consistency. And I can't really do either for fear. I hate it so much I could just vomit.
-Yes, I know I'm loved. But I want someone here with me. And right now, I can't think of anyone. I mean, sure. April calls all the time, but she won't be here for another, uh, two weeks? I can't hold out that long. I need someone here, like, nowish.
Time to go. See ya all around.
(When I heard this song on the THUG soundtrack, I fell in love with it. And that was before I became a delinquient Bohemian. ^_^)
"Mommy's Little Monster"
by Social Distortion
Mommy's little monster dropped out of school,
Mommy's little monster broke all the rules.
He loves to go out drinking with the boys,
He loves to go out and make some noise.
He doesn't wanna be a doctor or a lawyer get fat rich.
He's 20 years old and he quit his job
Unemployment pays his rent
His brothers sisters have tasted sweet success,
His parents condemn him, say "his life's a mess!"
He's mommy's little monster, he's not afraid to admit
He's mommy's little monster, don't wake him in a fit
I'm here at Toe's. Have been here all day. Nobody to talk to or anything. So I've been busying myself with character design using the excellent City of Heroes. There's a tiny bit of "Eh, close enough." But most of it is dead on, scary. So I finally settled on one model's hair. Liberty spikes. ^________~
Ross went for an all-day thing. I followed because the alternative was grim. The carpets were cleaned at 11, and should be dry... right now. I might go back. Sleep. I need a girl to hang out with. I'm getting a bit burnt out on testosterone. Blame my asshole brothers.
They went off insulting my friends for no good reason the other day. I was really hurt and offended. I mean, me, it's fine. I can throw it back, no problem. But them, it's just hurtful and wrong if you ask me. Calling April a bitch and KG a dyke was just... Ugh. I'm moving along. It pisses me off even thinking about it.
I need someone I can just hang out with. I can't even see Amity right now because I need a different type of person. Bao might be close, but she'd be too motherly, and I don't need advice right now. I know what to do, it's just that... well...
Call me pathetic, but I want to feel loved right now.
I will answer two arguments now. "Pity whore!" and "But you are!"
-Yes, I know I'm a pity whore. I'm trying to wean myself off of it, right? But right now, I'm either ready to explode, bored to tears, or just plain tired. My disillusionment with my family, situation, and just life in general is kinda disheartening. I only go to church to see some people, otherwise it's just empty. I want to start smoking again, but A: I'm poor, and B: I can't right now because of circumstances. I'm pretty sure Dad knew exactly what kind of furor telling Mom I smoked would create. He promised me he'd make my life difficult, after all. I'm always hovering on the border, here: Tell them and leave forever, or painfully endure for the sake of consistency. And I can't really do either for fear. I hate it so much I could just vomit.
-Yes, I know I'm loved. But I want someone here with me. And right now, I can't think of anyone. I mean, sure. April calls all the time, but she won't be here for another, uh, two weeks? I can't hold out that long. I need someone here, like, nowish.
Time to go. See ya all around.
(When I heard this song on the THUG soundtrack, I fell in love with it. And that was before I became a delinquient Bohemian. ^_^)
"Mommy's Little Monster"
by Social Distortion
Mommy's little monster dropped out of school,
Mommy's little monster broke all the rules.
He loves to go out drinking with the boys,
He loves to go out and make some noise.
He doesn't wanna be a doctor or a lawyer get fat rich.
He's 20 years old and he quit his job
Unemployment pays his rent
His brothers sisters have tasted sweet success,
His parents condemn him, say "his life's a mess!"
He's mommy's little monster, he's not afraid to admit
He's mommy's little monster, don't wake him in a fit