deep thoughts from the dark mind of tori
ok, so before i get to these so called deep thoughts, some amusement for you:
from chris wray:
Dan Covich and me came up with the following back story for you... now you have to come up with ours...
"Tori was born in the Mojave Desert, which explains her fondness for Dessert. She was raised by wild jack rabbits, and adopted shortly after the start of kindergarten. She was good at math, but because of her poor language and social skills, the teachers thought she was a terrorist. She spent time in Gitmo before being sent to Wash.U. as a spy against the jews."
from me:
"Chris Wray was born on the streets of New York City. His mother was a dirty whore who accidentally got knocked up by a sleezy politician. This explains his "shifty morals," his quasi-political aspirations, and his innate ability to speak like he knows what he's talking about. (Unfortunately, there is no explanation as to why CW is deathly afraid of kiwis. An unsolved mystery, to be sure). While still a young pup, he would watch attentively while his mother collected her fees, developing an obsession with money early on in life. After sleeping with a pfeasant farmer from Hellsville, MO, she agreed to give him a discount if the farmer would take the mangy redhead off her hands. As a result, little Christopher was dumped off on some random pfeasant breeding site in the middle of nowhere for the next 19 years of his life. Because his biological mother sort of looked like a Native American (her hair was black like an Indian's, mostly because it was dirty... but don't tell Chris - it'll break his heart), Chris decided to pretend that he, too, was of NA lineage. This is what he believes got him into a distinguished school like Wash U. In reality, it was his father's blood that got him accepted. Turns out the scheezy politician that knocked up his mother was really a relation of the St. Louis Danforths, who pushed through his application to make up for being a rotten biological father. How ironic that the real Danforth relative at Wash U is not the one whose last name is actually Danforth..."
"Dan Covich was born in South Beach,FL and immediately exhiled to the distant land of Auburn, NY on account of his already-questionable sexuality (as a newborn, he was seen attempting to hit on a male nurse AND a female nurse at the same time - what a manwhore!). Feeling sorry for the poor, yet adorably cute little boy that looked somewhat like a chihuahua (why he isnt STILL cute is beyond me...), an exhiled fascist dictator, masquerading as an American conservative, took Dan into his home. What is it with Auburn being the home of so many of the world's unwanted specimens? But I digress. Upon learning the reason why his "son" was exhiled from the flashy lights of South Beach, the former fascist re-exhiled Dan to the unknown lands of Missouri. (He would have sent him all the way to the West Coast, but being fascist, he was also a pennypincher and didn't want to spend the extra $2 to ship him to Cali). Dan now feels that his life at Wash U is a bit, shall I say, "incomplete". His good friend Chris Wray (ref. "dirty whore", "scheezy" and "redhead"), believes that Dan's life is not just incomplete, but incongruous as well. Good luck getting Chris to give you the REAL definition of incongruous... he'll probably spout some nonsense about politics and pseudo-philosophy that sounds like a real answer but probably isnt. Just tell him to go choke on a kiwi. It should shut him up."
mine were a lot longer, and definitely better written!!
ok, so i really only had one deep thought relating to career options. i have NO CLUE what to do with my life! i was expecting this summer to validate my belief that public accounting was the way to go. now, i dont so much know. i LOVE working for motorola. the people ROCK and the location ain't half bad, either. the main appeal of public accounting though, is the money. they pay MUCH better than corporate accounting... and sad as it is to admit, money matters. so, assuming i get job offers from motorola and at least one big 4 accounting firm, i will be hardpressed to figure out what the hell to do. pros to being in public: more money, initially more prestige, future career opportunities that span both private and public accounting. cons: hours suck, some of the people suck, the "stigma" of being a cpa.
*sighs* i would make a pros and cons list for private accounting, but all the generalizations would really be pros and cons of working for motorola. so yeah, i already know those. main con = less money. main pro = corporate culture here is pretty damn cool. another pro would be a more steady work schedule. it'd give me more time to write that novel i'm determined to write. someday...
AIYAH! i hate decisions. i remember trying to decide which wash u school to apply to. THAT was a pain in the ass, i tell you what. not even really sure where business came from! two years after that, i narrowed "business" to "accounting" and was damn proud of that. now i have to do it again!!! "private" or "public"... wow, they dont ever stop, do they? paper or plastic?
from chris wray:
Dan Covich and me came up with the following back story for you... now you have to come up with ours...
"Tori was born in the Mojave Desert, which explains her fondness for Dessert. She was raised by wild jack rabbits, and adopted shortly after the start of kindergarten. She was good at math, but because of her poor language and social skills, the teachers thought she was a terrorist. She spent time in Gitmo before being sent to Wash.U. as a spy against the jews."
from me:
"Chris Wray was born on the streets of New York City. His mother was a dirty whore who accidentally got knocked up by a sleezy politician. This explains his "shifty morals," his quasi-political aspirations, and his innate ability to speak like he knows what he's talking about. (Unfortunately, there is no explanation as to why CW is deathly afraid of kiwis. An unsolved mystery, to be sure). While still a young pup, he would watch attentively while his mother collected her fees, developing an obsession with money early on in life. After sleeping with a pfeasant farmer from Hellsville, MO, she agreed to give him a discount if the farmer would take the mangy redhead off her hands. As a result, little Christopher was dumped off on some random pfeasant breeding site in the middle of nowhere for the next 19 years of his life. Because his biological mother sort of looked like a Native American (her hair was black like an Indian's, mostly because it was dirty... but don't tell Chris - it'll break his heart), Chris decided to pretend that he, too, was of NA lineage. This is what he believes got him into a distinguished school like Wash U. In reality, it was his father's blood that got him accepted. Turns out the scheezy politician that knocked up his mother was really a relation of the St. Louis Danforths, who pushed through his application to make up for being a rotten biological father. How ironic that the real Danforth relative at Wash U is not the one whose last name is actually Danforth..."
"Dan Covich was born in South Beach,FL and immediately exhiled to the distant land of Auburn, NY on account of his already-questionable sexuality (as a newborn, he was seen attempting to hit on a male nurse AND a female nurse at the same time - what a manwhore!). Feeling sorry for the poor, yet adorably cute little boy that looked somewhat like a chihuahua (why he isnt STILL cute is beyond me...), an exhiled fascist dictator, masquerading as an American conservative, took Dan into his home. What is it with Auburn being the home of so many of the world's unwanted specimens? But I digress. Upon learning the reason why his "son" was exhiled from the flashy lights of South Beach, the former fascist re-exhiled Dan to the unknown lands of Missouri. (He would have sent him all the way to the West Coast, but being fascist, he was also a pennypincher and didn't want to spend the extra $2 to ship him to Cali). Dan now feels that his life at Wash U is a bit, shall I say, "incomplete". His good friend Chris Wray (ref. "dirty whore", "scheezy" and "redhead"), believes that Dan's life is not just incomplete, but incongruous as well. Good luck getting Chris to give you the REAL definition of incongruous... he'll probably spout some nonsense about politics and pseudo-philosophy that sounds like a real answer but probably isnt. Just tell him to go choke on a kiwi. It should shut him up."
mine were a lot longer, and definitely better written!!
ok, so i really only had one deep thought relating to career options. i have NO CLUE what to do with my life! i was expecting this summer to validate my belief that public accounting was the way to go. now, i dont so much know. i LOVE working for motorola. the people ROCK and the location ain't half bad, either. the main appeal of public accounting though, is the money. they pay MUCH better than corporate accounting... and sad as it is to admit, money matters. so, assuming i get job offers from motorola and at least one big 4 accounting firm, i will be hardpressed to figure out what the hell to do. pros to being in public: more money, initially more prestige, future career opportunities that span both private and public accounting. cons: hours suck, some of the people suck, the "stigma" of being a cpa.
*sighs* i would make a pros and cons list for private accounting, but all the generalizations would really be pros and cons of working for motorola. so yeah, i already know those. main con = less money. main pro = corporate culture here is pretty damn cool. another pro would be a more steady work schedule. it'd give me more time to write that novel i'm determined to write. someday...
AIYAH! i hate decisions. i remember trying to decide which wash u school to apply to. THAT was a pain in the ass, i tell you what. not even really sure where business came from! two years after that, i narrowed "business" to "accounting" and was damn proud of that. now i have to do it again!!! "private" or "public"... wow, they dont ever stop, do they? paper or plastic?