This could break my heart or save me
"Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell." edna st vincent millay
No one wants to know they're being gotten over. I'm throwing myself into an apartment search and upon discovering the right place, I'll nest a little and make it home - a home I'll probably never want to leave. I think I could nearly feel human again in a couple of weeks. I've stopped boozing for dinner, but I'm not on a regular eating schedule yet... but I think that might be cronhs related, which is terrifying all by itself.
So, here's a bit of a rant I went on earlier:
They raise them differently in Europe. I'm very much done with North American boys BUT I don't like German or French boys that much, either... so I've gotta meet some other internationals.
God damn North American boys (Canadians and Mexicans, though I've never dated a proper Mexican, included) think they can have their cake and eat it too... have a serious girl on the side that thinks the world of them and will always be there when they call, but then they're out fucking other bitches. Well guess what, you selfish North American pigs? I will stand for it no longer. I deserve to be a guy's one and only; I deserve to be worshipped and appreciated.
::exits soapbox::
The poor (North American) boy that had to hear about it (who is now living in Scotland) had this much to say:
"Its so fucked up ... bc ur such a freaking amazing chill girl ... so i think u should def find a good guy that takes care of u and loves u ... ur a rarity id have to say"
Be still, my heart. Someone's mother raised him well. Rumour has it American women are too "strong", whatever that means. Sorry I have an opinion, sorry I stand for things, sorry I'm not just going to lay down and let you treat me like a pet. Actually, on second thought, I'm not sorry at all - if I spend the rest of my life single or in and out of heartbreaking relationships, at least I'll always know I never let go of myself, my standards, my morals and values.
Thank you Vietnam, you'll never know how much you've given me.
No one wants to know they're being gotten over. I'm throwing myself into an apartment search and upon discovering the right place, I'll nest a little and make it home - a home I'll probably never want to leave. I think I could nearly feel human again in a couple of weeks. I've stopped boozing for dinner, but I'm not on a regular eating schedule yet... but I think that might be cronhs related, which is terrifying all by itself.
So, here's a bit of a rant I went on earlier:
They raise them differently in Europe. I'm very much done with North American boys BUT I don't like German or French boys that much, either... so I've gotta meet some other internationals.
God damn North American boys (Canadians and Mexicans, though I've never dated a proper Mexican, included) think they can have their cake and eat it too... have a serious girl on the side that thinks the world of them and will always be there when they call, but then they're out fucking other bitches. Well guess what, you selfish North American pigs? I will stand for it no longer. I deserve to be a guy's one and only; I deserve to be worshipped and appreciated.
::exits soapbox::
The poor (North American) boy that had to hear about it (who is now living in Scotland) had this much to say:
"Its so fucked up ... bc ur such a freaking amazing chill girl ... so i think u should def find a good guy that takes care of u and loves u ... ur a rarity id have to say"
Be still, my heart. Someone's mother raised him well. Rumour has it American women are too "strong", whatever that means. Sorry I have an opinion, sorry I stand for things, sorry I'm not just going to lay down and let you treat me like a pet. Actually, on second thought, I'm not sorry at all - if I spend the rest of my life single or in and out of heartbreaking relationships, at least I'll always know I never let go of myself, my standards, my morals and values.
Thank you Vietnam, you'll never know how much you've given me.