Somehow not shitting myself
Crazy stuff. Finals start this monday, I'm guaranteed to fail math, and I... don't care. I remember this time last year when I flogged myself for days before the internals, suffered little mini-breakdowns every night... and now I don't even care. I'm poking at math a little bit, but the highest grade I ever got in that stupid class was like a D, for like, "finals" anyway, not topic-specific stuff. I hate it, I've hated every second of it, and after these finals are over I will never ever have to touch it again. I can get the diploma even if i fail one higher level subject, so it's okay. I can fail math, so long as I get that A* coming to me in music (yesplz) and the B (hopefully A?) in Design Tech. English is awwright, Japanese is awwright, Economics will be pretty lulz. I'll study a bit for that before the final i guess.
I've shed that awful mindset I had in the first year of working because i "had to" or whatever. I'm only doing stuff for fun now. the finals are kind of over already, for me. whatever happens happens. I want the summer. I want to focus all my energy on Japanese, sort out my immigration, take the JLPT 4 in december and buy a latin course. that's it. i don't care about the stupid diploma, my god, i don't care, so long as i pass it and don't have to touch it again. uuuuugh.
plan for tomorrow is:
+260 oatmeal, maple syrup, coffee
+300 subway turkey sub on wheat, toasted, no cheese, with olives, cucumber, jalapenos, bbq sauce and honey mustard.
+50 vegetable soup
+100 ice cream sammch
+37 hot chocolate
+ green teas
total: 747
-1407 BMR
-100 walking to and from the bus stop
-100 walking from subways to school
- like 9284798347593 studying japanese for two hours, or so it feels ._.;
total: -860
i have to go to the dentist tomorrow, euh :/ just for a clean (yay!) and a routine checkup, but it's so boring ._.
i keep forgetting to mail christian and tim about the 6/20 meetings and the LA talk. D: i feel sooo bad.... actually, i'll go mail them now. fffff. <3
also, best piece of news i could ever have had: Noa, Matty and Vani, you guys know ♥♥♥
I've shed that awful mindset I had in the first year of working because i "had to" or whatever. I'm only doing stuff for fun now. the finals are kind of over already, for me. whatever happens happens. I want the summer. I want to focus all my energy on Japanese, sort out my immigration, take the JLPT 4 in december and buy a latin course. that's it. i don't care about the stupid diploma, my god, i don't care, so long as i pass it and don't have to touch it again. uuuuugh.
plan for tomorrow is:
+260 oatmeal, maple syrup, coffee
+300 subway turkey sub on wheat, toasted, no cheese, with olives, cucumber, jalapenos, bbq sauce and honey mustard.
+50 vegetable soup
+100 ice cream sammch
+37 hot chocolate
+ green teas
total: 747
-1407 BMR
-100 walking to and from the bus stop
-100 walking from subways to school
- like 9284798347593 studying japanese for two hours, or so it feels ._.;
total: -860
i have to go to the dentist tomorrow, euh :/ just for a clean (yay!) and a routine checkup, but it's so boring ._.
i keep forgetting to mail christian and tim about the 6/20 meetings and the LA talk. D: i feel sooo bad.... actually, i'll go mail them now. fffff. <3
also, best piece of news i could ever have had: Noa, Matty and Vani, you guys know ♥♥♥