Wil Wheaton's hilarious tweets
. . .or "Why I love Wil Wheaton"
Beginning with July 13. . .
Took a break to bring in laundry. Cat climbed into basket to sleep on clean clothes. He is officially fucking with me.
Me: You need to move. Cat: Can't talk. Sleeping. Me: Dude, you're on my clean clothes. Cat: You think these are yours? That's adorable.
Me: What are you- Cat: YOUR WAY! I AM IN IT! Me: Would y-? Cat: LOLWHUT? Me: I need to sit- Cat: IM IN UR CHAIR HAVIN MAH BATH! Me: Sigh.
Me: Hey kitty! What are you doing? Cat: Plotting to kill you when you sleep. Me:...what? Cat:...what? Me: Plotting? Cat: Oh, I mean "purrr."
Cat: UR MOUSE LET ME PLAY WIT IT. Me: Dude, I'm working here. Cat: MOUSE MOUSE MOUSE PLAY PLAY PLAY. Me: Go get a real mouse. Cat: RAWR!
Me: OUCH! WHAT THE FUCK?! Cat: You were tapping your foot so I pounced it. Me: You- Cat: Had to. It's the law. Me: Bu- Cat: I CHASE BUG NOW!
RT @WilliamShatner "@wilw Thank you for following me. May I return the favor? My best, Bill" Head: exploding. Mind: blown.
Cat: What was that? Me: Shatnerquake. Cat: OMG NO WAI! Me: Wai.
Me: There's a vest over there that I like. Anne: Is it made from real gorilla chest? Me: It's imitation gorilla chest. Anne: Weak.
GAH! I fucking HATE IT when I bite my tongue. It's not like I don't know where it is and deal with it EVERY SECOND OF EVERY FUCKING DAY.
Me: Twitter wants me to ask you- Cat: Sleeping now. Talk later. Me: But the masses, they demand- Cat: I will kill you. Me: [backs away]
Cat: OK AWAKE NOW! Me: Aren't you cute! Cat: GONNA CLIMB ON U AND LICK UR BEARD! Me: Um. Okay... Cat: OKAY ALL DONE FEED ME NOW.
Cat: Purrrr. This is my favorite place to sleep. Me: You're on my arms and I'm trying to- Cat: I said, "This is my favorite place to sleep."
Me: Ok, I need to go to sleep. Cat: But I must CHASE SOMETHING ONLY I CAN SEE ACROSS THE BED DOWN THE HALLWAY AND BACK INTO YOUR ROOM AGAIN!
Beginning with July 13. . .
Took a break to bring in laundry. Cat climbed into basket to sleep on clean clothes. He is officially fucking with me.
Me: You need to move. Cat: Can't talk. Sleeping. Me: Dude, you're on my clean clothes. Cat: You think these are yours? That's adorable.
Me: What are you- Cat: YOUR WAY! I AM IN IT! Me: Would y-? Cat: LOLWHUT? Me: I need to sit- Cat: IM IN UR CHAIR HAVIN MAH BATH! Me: Sigh.
Me: Hey kitty! What are you doing? Cat: Plotting to kill you when you sleep. Me:...what? Cat:...what? Me: Plotting? Cat: Oh, I mean "purrr."
Cat: UR MOUSE LET ME PLAY WIT IT. Me: Dude, I'm working here. Cat: MOUSE MOUSE MOUSE PLAY PLAY PLAY. Me: Go get a real mouse. Cat: RAWR!
Me: OUCH! WHAT THE FUCK?! Cat: You were tapping your foot so I pounced it. Me: You- Cat: Had to. It's the law. Me: Bu- Cat: I CHASE BUG NOW!
RT @WilliamShatner "@wilw Thank you for following me. May I return the favor? My best, Bill" Head: exploding. Mind: blown.
Cat: What was that? Me: Shatnerquake. Cat: OMG NO WAI! Me: Wai.
Me: There's a vest over there that I like. Anne: Is it made from real gorilla chest? Me: It's imitation gorilla chest. Anne: Weak.
GAH! I fucking HATE IT when I bite my tongue. It's not like I don't know where it is and deal with it EVERY SECOND OF EVERY FUCKING DAY.
Me: Twitter wants me to ask you- Cat: Sleeping now. Talk later. Me: But the masses, they demand- Cat: I will kill you. Me: [backs away]
Cat: OK AWAKE NOW! Me: Aren't you cute! Cat: GONNA CLIMB ON U AND LICK UR BEARD! Me: Um. Okay... Cat: OKAY ALL DONE FEED ME NOW.
Cat: Purrrr. This is my favorite place to sleep. Me: You're on my arms and I'm trying to- Cat: I said, "This is my favorite place to sleep."
Me: Ok, I need to go to sleep. Cat: But I must CHASE SOMETHING ONLY I CAN SEE ACROSS THE BED DOWN THE HALLWAY AND BACK INTO YOUR ROOM AGAIN!