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[rialc]

Well, things are going much better since my last post. I am doing well, and despite having the worst morning ever! I am quite happy with my life right now. I could sure use to be doing better in school, but I don't attribute that to Brian at all, actually, I would blame work first. I am still completing all assignments and studying as I ought, I

Comments

[ewee]

My comment was coming from a strictly Christian view of dating. From what I understand, you are not a Christian, so chances are you wouldn't agree with what I said. But, according to what most Christians believe, dating is not ment to be just an "extended friendship" as you put it. Dating is strictly to find out if the person you are interested in is someone you could marry. Anything less than that should remain in a friendship so as to keep the emotional part out of your getting to know one another. The more emotional you get before really getting to know the person, the harder it can become to really tell what the person is like

[rialc]

Thank you both for your input. Elyse, I do understand where you are coming from, and having grown up in the same house as you, I appreciate what you are trying to say. However, you do not know the circumstances. You have never been in any relationship except that most perfect one that you are in now! What if I bring him home to mommy and then he dumps me tomorrow? There are ryhmes and reasons galore that I do what I do. Just because you are privalaged to read my lj, doesn't mean you know everything that is going on! If you want to know more, there is a very simple solution to that problem. Ask me

[ewee]

First, my relationship isn't as perfect as you think it is. We have hard times, and other things that make it not so perfect. I don't pretend to know all that is going on, but it seems to me that if the fear of him turning around and dumping you for no apparent reason is there...why on earth are you giving him your trust and dating him? For the girl who seemed so ready to take on the Christian style of dating, aka, courtship instead of just casual dating, it just seems sad that you would give it all up just because you are "on your own" or being an adult.

[rialc]

Who said I'm casually dating anyone? Quit passing judgement on a situation you know nothing about!

[ewee]

If it is more than casual dating, you should be fine to inform your parents of your relationship. But then you have never been one to follow what has been taught as the right thing to do. Think of what you would want for your daughter to do if she was in your situation. Wouldn't your feelings be just a tad hurt if she was dating someone and you had no idea about it?

[rialc]

Elyse, stop. You do not know the situation and yet you continue to pass judgement on it! Either ask me, or discontinue posting comments that are only going to lead me to be more and more upset. Please do not become the same sort of influence Joseph has/had. I would hate to have to block my own sister. I know you are better than this. I am challenging you to live up to that.

[ewee]

It is wonderful that you are happy with the new relationship. It is always hard once you have left and moved out on your own to get the right balance between getting distance to become yourself and keeping the people in your family informed.

I am a little older than you (40). My experience has been that it is easier to tell a family when they are there to be supportive and an ear to listen. The more family members feel the desire to criticize the more painful it is to include them. I have four siblings and I can tell you that, sadly, the more a family interferes the more likely they are to ultimately hurt the bonds that need to exist between adults as equals in a loving family relationship.

From a Christian perspective my view on this is to "judge not others lest ye be judged". I hope and pray that your family is able to adapt to your transition to adulthood and not drive you off.

DonQuixote