(no subject)
My mom sent me an email today. Telling me that she talked to my grandma, aunt, brother and sister-in-law about me. I didn't have any problem with this because in the long run I feel that it makes it easier for me. She said that they all suspected it and that they were all OK with it. She also talked to her lesbian friends and they told her that they knew a long time ago, but they couldn't tell her (respectable gay code, I guess). I think that I want my mom to be ok with it and tell me that everything is ok right now, but in reality.. she deserves as much time as she needs to think about it. I dropped a huge bombshell on her yesterday that was totally unexpected. I have had years to think about this and plenty of experiences to test out the waters. She has had about 36 hours to think about this.. all in all she is reacting quite well. Here are some of her concerns or comments over the last 36 hours...
Do all gay men wear make up?
What about AIDS?
Do you have a partner?
Some gays don't even find a partner and live alone most of their lives.
Everyone else seemed to have an idea and I am just the idiot that never caught on.
I don't understand why people would be attracted to the same sex?
I told her that this is a learning experience. I tried to educate her to the best of my ability. Som of my answers:
I told her that not all gay men wear make up, that there are several different kinds of gay men and she would be astonished at who was really gay.
Hetero's are just as susceptible to getting AIDS as Homo's are... we take precautions and also have safe sex.
No, I do not have a partner at the moment. Shouln't everyone have the right to be happy and have a partner. If they choose to be single, then that is their choice.
Why would you catch on, I have been this way all my life. You have been around it.. that is the way I am and that is what you know. So why would you question it. When others from the outside look in.. perhaps they see things that you think are normal. Also I have gotten pretty good at hiding it. When you live in the closet you are an expert at knowing what to say, how to act and avoiding certain situations that could expose you.
I told her it is as natural as your love for your husband. I feel what you feel except it is for men. It is not gross or disgusting. That is what society wants you to believe.
Overall, I feel that she accepts it to an extent now. She is not going to disown me. She needs to come to terms with it in her own time. Eventually she will start to breakdown the stereotypes and the ignorance. Who knows.. maybe I will have the next Debbie Novotony on my hands. I just thought I would share. I have never been trough this and I don't know many people who have. I am sure there is a long road ahead. The events so far have shown me that my family does support it.. they just need time to get use to it.
"Rome wasn't built in a day" ~ author unknown to me
"Rome wasn't built in a day, but you can sure see it all in one," ~ Amy Dobler Rome, Italy March 2005
Do all gay men wear make up?
What about AIDS?
Do you have a partner?
Some gays don't even find a partner and live alone most of their lives.
Everyone else seemed to have an idea and I am just the idiot that never caught on.
I don't understand why people would be attracted to the same sex?
I told her that this is a learning experience. I tried to educate her to the best of my ability. Som of my answers:
I told her that not all gay men wear make up, that there are several different kinds of gay men and she would be astonished at who was really gay.
Hetero's are just as susceptible to getting AIDS as Homo's are... we take precautions and also have safe sex.
No, I do not have a partner at the moment. Shouln't everyone have the right to be happy and have a partner. If they choose to be single, then that is their choice.
Why would you catch on, I have been this way all my life. You have been around it.. that is the way I am and that is what you know. So why would you question it. When others from the outside look in.. perhaps they see things that you think are normal. Also I have gotten pretty good at hiding it. When you live in the closet you are an expert at knowing what to say, how to act and avoiding certain situations that could expose you.
I told her it is as natural as your love for your husband. I feel what you feel except it is for men. It is not gross or disgusting. That is what society wants you to believe.
Overall, I feel that she accepts it to an extent now. She is not going to disown me. She needs to come to terms with it in her own time. Eventually she will start to breakdown the stereotypes and the ignorance. Who knows.. maybe I will have the next Debbie Novotony on my hands. I just thought I would share. I have never been trough this and I don't know many people who have. I am sure there is a long road ahead. The events so far have shown me that my family does support it.. they just need time to get use to it.
"Rome wasn't built in a day" ~ author unknown to me
"Rome wasn't built in a day, but you can sure see it all in one," ~ Amy Dobler Rome, Italy March 2005