Killed by pointy sticks
well, tomorrow begins Hat Attack. The whole notion of assassinating someone with yarn just strikes me silly, so of course I have to attempt it. Over 300 people have signed up to play this ridiculous game, probably all of them better knitters than me. All of them more anxious than me, judging from the amount of emails the organizers are getting. Entire pages of questions relating to gauge and swatching and other jargon-related theoretical activities. They debate the relative merit of types of needles, how exactly to create a gauge swatch that can be measured accurately, what kinds of detachable lunacy are permitted, how to tell if a hat fails to kill its recipient because of faulty construction. Nobody wants to make the same exact hat as anyone else. I'm sure that's not going to be a problem. I, myself, in preparation for the assault have assembled my own kit. it consists of the following:
1. a box of knitting needles, different sizes, lengths and materials. some have mates, some don't. the double pointed ones, some metal, some wood, some have the ends chewed off by a dog.
2. I have a bunch of yarn, in a box in the shed. probably have enough of one color to make a hat. I'll take a flashlight out later and see if I can find the box, and hope no squirrells or mice found it first.
3. I have some stitch markers around somewhere, made out of hemp left over from the macrame' craze of the 70's. I wonder, if I cut them into little pieces, I could smoke them up.
that's enough to produce a successful weapon, right? oh, and I forgot to list my skillz. I know how to make a cable. with and without a needle. and earflaps, I know how to make earflaps. probably don't need that skill. people keep talking about how they want to actually WEAR these hats. maybe I should see if I have any camoflage yarn left from the sweater I made the dog. haven't seen that dog in a while, seems to work okay.
well, I'll post again after I receive my target and pattern. let's see if I can let some knitting blood!