day 2
Title: 5 scenes Íker Casillas witnessed that he wished he hadn’t.
Characters: Random members of La Selección
Word Count: 445
Rating: PG; sexual references
Disclaimer: If you're stupid enough to think these are real, then you deserve to be sued. I however, don't. Kthx.
Author’s Notes: In my defence, they’re short but funny. Dedicated to princess_kenobi for her birthday. Happy birthday mama. ♥
1)
Joaquín teaching Xavi and David Villa how to do the Macarena. “As if you don’t know how to do it!” he had exclaimed, after stumbling upon an old magazine that had been floating around in the bottom of Xavi’s suitcase. When both Xavi and David, who had been passing by at the time, returned his enraged expression with blank looks, he took it upon himself to teach them how to do it. If only Íker had known that they were intending on doing it in their underwear…
2)
Well, basically anything that involved Sergio and Fernando. They pretty much regressed into a pair of horny 16-year-olds when the national team met up. No man was safe from the horrors that a closed door or dark corner could hide. Or lack thereof. The fact that Cesc and Xavi had set him up last time, but assuring him that both had left the hotel lounge 20 minutes before…revenge was a dish best served cold fast became Íker Casillas’s motto. Ice cold.
3)
Aragonés getting out his shower. Sweet mother of jesus, the human body should not be able to sag like that.
4)
The locker rooms after their World Cup exit. He didn’t know a group of men could be so shattered (that he could be so shattered) over a competition. It would forever haunt him, chill him to his core.
5)
Cesc playing Guitar Hero. See, the fact itself wasn’t that Cesc was bad at the actual game play- he was actually quite good. He’d beaten Slash in a battle and had crowed about the result for a week, at first over the phone to Íker and then when they met up. But, the thing was, he insisted on singing along to whatever he was playing. And Cesc’s voice wasn’t particularly enjoyable to listen to. At all. It had gotten so bad that, one day he’d turned on the PS2 in the lounge room the boys shared, started up the game and began to sing, and someone had turned off the lights. Íker, who had been reading his paper peacefully at the time, his iPod jammed happily into his ears, began to call out in protest, but the lights turned back on and Cesc had disappeared completely. The guitar was kicked to the side, the game had been paused, and Cesc was completely gone. To this day, none of them will tell him where they hid Cesc, and whenever he broaches the issue, Cesc turns an interesting shade of grey and clams up completely.
~~~FIN.
10 things David Villa made sure to pack when going to national team meetings.
1)
Earplugs. Some crackalackin’ stuff went down during national team meetings, whether it was Cesc singing, Fernando banging Sergio or Íker threatening to kill someone, but it was a necessity. He had called Raúl Tamundo the moment he’d heard he was being called up, and had advised him to pack a pair. Raúl, bewildered, had agreed. The day after his first night, he’d thanked David vigorously. Turns out Carles snores like a freight train.
2)
A few BB guns. Besides the fact it got unbelievably boring during the nights, Joaquín was pissing him off lately. A few pelts from the gun and he’d stop whatever he was doing, sharpish. Íker had inquired rather slyly one evening, asking him where he’d got them. He was sure Cesc was going to suffer because of it.
3)
His iPod. Like he said, crackalackin’ stuff went down during national team meetings.
4)
His wife’s pillow. Usually rooming with Joaquín meant ridiculously early mornings. The pillow was rather thick and unbelievably comfortable, so it was a win/win situation.
5)
A book to read. The last time he’d made the mistake of bringing a few gossip magazines, which Cesc and Sergio latched onto immediately and he spent the next 3 days telling them he didn’t care how fat Britney Spears was or how lame Brad Pitt had gotten.
6)
Sunglasses. Paparazzi shots gave him headaches, and Xavi usually made him get drunk after the first night. He used the word ‘made’ because it started out him saying no, and Xavi hammering away for at least an hour until he caved in.
7)
Aspirin. Hangovers and training were not his friend.
8)
His mobile. Someone always managed to get in trouble during the camp, and since they were so spread out across the hotel (note: sarcasm), mobiles were their chief way of communication.
9)
A camera. He just had to have some sort of footage when Íker finally snapped and stabbed someone.
10)
Mace. There was only so much he could take, after all.
~~~FIN.
Characters: Random members of La Selección
Word Count: 445
Rating: PG; sexual references
Disclaimer: If you're stupid enough to think these are real, then you deserve to be sued. I however, don't. Kthx.
Author’s Notes: In my defence, they’re short but funny. Dedicated to princess_kenobi for her birthday. Happy birthday mama. ♥
1)
Joaquín teaching Xavi and David Villa how to do the Macarena. “As if you don’t know how to do it!” he had exclaimed, after stumbling upon an old magazine that had been floating around in the bottom of Xavi’s suitcase. When both Xavi and David, who had been passing by at the time, returned his enraged expression with blank looks, he took it upon himself to teach them how to do it. If only Íker had known that they were intending on doing it in their underwear…
2)
Well, basically anything that involved Sergio and Fernando. They pretty much regressed into a pair of horny 16-year-olds when the national team met up. No man was safe from the horrors that a closed door or dark corner could hide. Or lack thereof. The fact that Cesc and Xavi had set him up last time, but assuring him that both had left the hotel lounge 20 minutes before…revenge was a dish best served cold fast became Íker Casillas’s motto. Ice cold.
3)
Aragonés getting out his shower. Sweet mother of jesus, the human body should not be able to sag like that.
4)
The locker rooms after their World Cup exit. He didn’t know a group of men could be so shattered (that he could be so shattered) over a competition. It would forever haunt him, chill him to his core.
5)
Cesc playing Guitar Hero. See, the fact itself wasn’t that Cesc was bad at the actual game play- he was actually quite good. He’d beaten Slash in a battle and had crowed about the result for a week, at first over the phone to Íker and then when they met up. But, the thing was, he insisted on singing along to whatever he was playing. And Cesc’s voice wasn’t particularly enjoyable to listen to. At all. It had gotten so bad that, one day he’d turned on the PS2 in the lounge room the boys shared, started up the game and began to sing, and someone had turned off the lights. Íker, who had been reading his paper peacefully at the time, his iPod jammed happily into his ears, began to call out in protest, but the lights turned back on and Cesc had disappeared completely. The guitar was kicked to the side, the game had been paused, and Cesc was completely gone. To this day, none of them will tell him where they hid Cesc, and whenever he broaches the issue, Cesc turns an interesting shade of grey and clams up completely.
~~~FIN.
10 things David Villa made sure to pack when going to national team meetings.
1)
Earplugs. Some crackalackin’ stuff went down during national team meetings, whether it was Cesc singing, Fernando banging Sergio or Íker threatening to kill someone, but it was a necessity. He had called Raúl Tamundo the moment he’d heard he was being called up, and had advised him to pack a pair. Raúl, bewildered, had agreed. The day after his first night, he’d thanked David vigorously. Turns out Carles snores like a freight train.
2)
A few BB guns. Besides the fact it got unbelievably boring during the nights, Joaquín was pissing him off lately. A few pelts from the gun and he’d stop whatever he was doing, sharpish. Íker had inquired rather slyly one evening, asking him where he’d got them. He was sure Cesc was going to suffer because of it.
3)
His iPod. Like he said, crackalackin’ stuff went down during national team meetings.
4)
His wife’s pillow. Usually rooming with Joaquín meant ridiculously early mornings. The pillow was rather thick and unbelievably comfortable, so it was a win/win situation.
5)
A book to read. The last time he’d made the mistake of bringing a few gossip magazines, which Cesc and Sergio latched onto immediately and he spent the next 3 days telling them he didn’t care how fat Britney Spears was or how lame Brad Pitt had gotten.
6)
Sunglasses. Paparazzi shots gave him headaches, and Xavi usually made him get drunk after the first night. He used the word ‘made’ because it started out him saying no, and Xavi hammering away for at least an hour until he caved in.
7)
Aspirin. Hangovers and training were not his friend.
8)
His mobile. Someone always managed to get in trouble during the camp, and since they were so spread out across the hotel (note: sarcasm), mobiles were their chief way of communication.
9)
A camera. He just had to have some sort of footage when Íker finally snapped and stabbed someone.
10)
Mace. There was only so much he could take, after all.
~~~FIN.