Nov 04, 2004 17:42
well today was just a breakin-down point for me . i have never felt so alone in my life . i really have no one anymore . i dont understand this . and i know some of you will get joy from seein me hurt . but that is great . im happy that i can make my enimies happy . i really really am ! :] . at least im makin someone happy . i have had a really bad day/week/month/year/life .. lol .. i cant choose right now ! i can say that it isnt my life . up until now . i have been soo happy with my life . and greatful for everything i have . but now . i have nothing to be greatful for . i do . but i dont . i know some ppl care about me . but i just dont have anyone thats close to me like i used to . and i dont like this at all . it really upsets me . i guess you could call this my 'hard-time' . when i have to look to myself for help . not everyone else . its so hard though . i have to rediscover myself and be happy with it . then other will be happy with me :] atleast i hope ! i really hope and pray i make it through this okay . i mean . i know i wont die . but i hope that i can become comfortable with myself . and everything that goes on in my life . i thank everyone that has ever ever helped me or gave me advice . yall are awesome . i have needed it :] well . im goin to go try to find something to eat . comment on it if you wanna . later guys . love yall ! :] . -rhae :]