The unclefucker has no shame
The unclefucker has no shame
or,
Close enough proximity to a normal person
You know, I have been thinking the last few days about how I haven't been nearly so depressed lately as I usually am. I figure the main difference in my life is that I'm so busy between my three classes and two jobs that I haven't had time to feel any emotions. Also, I have the cats now, so I get more affection from them than I ever have from anyone else throughout the course of my life.
Then today, I went out to do my statistics out by the pool after work. As I was leaving, I figured I might as well go see who was in Jeffrey's apartment. Joseph and Mathew were both there, eating Benito's Pizza, which seemed odd to me since they're both unemployed and neither has any money. Still, it hasn't stopped them from spending money frivolously before. Anyway, they both seemed pretty apathetic about my appearance there, but that's not entirely unusual. They said they were in pain from the game of chicken on Saturday, so I told them about the text that Durodgio had sent me. (It was right after I asked Mathew what he thought of those girls, and he said they were white trash.) They then told me that people at the pool were getting pissed about me and my friends (I guess that means Durodgio) talking about people. I'm confused for a few reasons.
I was immediately stung by what they had said. There is a way that you say something like that to someone who is your friend, and there's a way that you say something like that to someone whom you don't want to be your friend. All of the nonverbals told me that this case was the latter. I immediately left.
I got really, really upset. I don't know how to fucking please anybody. I know that I'm not out of my mind in this respect: everybody talks about people; why is it that it's not okay when I do it, but everybody else can? Mathew just called the girl white trash before he reprimanded me for talking about her. I keep trying to convince myself that these people are my friends, but I find it progressively harder and harder to justify that conclusion. Mathew did call me earlier today, but it was to ask if he'd have a problem signing over his unemployment check to Jeffrey. Jeffrey also called me today, but it was because I had already left work and he wanted to know he should wait until I was there to cash that check. Why do I bend over backwards to do everything I can for these people, and yet I only get a call from them when they want something? And why is it that I get that impression from most everybody I try to be friends with?
What am I doing wrong here? I think my mistake is trying to have friends.
David Selliman came in today. He's this older man who wants my balls. He was telling me today that he wanted to write a letter to my superiors about me to say how great I am, and I told him just to call my regional. He told me that he was going to call the regional and say the following: "There's this guy who is so hot he convinced me to bring seventy thousand to this bank, and I wondered if you had some pull with him so I can get some benefits for my money."
The unclefucker has no shame.
Tomorrow I'm going to find out if it's possible to renege on buying the condo. As long as the seller can't sue me or something for retracting my offer, I'm withdrawing.
Earlier, I went to take the final in my Anatomy class. I was talking to my buddy Mohamed before the test about music, and he wanted me to hear a new cd he just made of Lebanese music. After we took the test, we went to his car, and he had me listen to a portion of each song on the cd he had just made. While I was sitting there, I suddenly became really depressed. Sometimes, just being in close enough proximity to a normal person who can actually live his life like everybody else is enough to do it.
or,
Close enough proximity to a normal person
You know, I have been thinking the last few days about how I haven't been nearly so depressed lately as I usually am. I figure the main difference in my life is that I'm so busy between my three classes and two jobs that I haven't had time to feel any emotions. Also, I have the cats now, so I get more affection from them than I ever have from anyone else throughout the course of my life.
Then today, I went out to do my statistics out by the pool after work. As I was leaving, I figured I might as well go see who was in Jeffrey's apartment. Joseph and Mathew were both there, eating Benito's Pizza, which seemed odd to me since they're both unemployed and neither has any money. Still, it hasn't stopped them from spending money frivolously before. Anyway, they both seemed pretty apathetic about my appearance there, but that's not entirely unusual. They said they were in pain from the game of chicken on Saturday, so I told them about the text that Durodgio had sent me. (It was right after I asked Mathew what he thought of those girls, and he said they were white trash.) They then told me that people at the pool were getting pissed about me and my friends (I guess that means Durodgio) talking about people. I'm confused for a few reasons.
I was immediately stung by what they had said. There is a way that you say something like that to someone who is your friend, and there's a way that you say something like that to someone whom you don't want to be your friend. All of the nonverbals told me that this case was the latter. I immediately left.
I got really, really upset. I don't know how to fucking please anybody. I know that I'm not out of my mind in this respect: everybody talks about people; why is it that it's not okay when I do it, but everybody else can? Mathew just called the girl white trash before he reprimanded me for talking about her. I keep trying to convince myself that these people are my friends, but I find it progressively harder and harder to justify that conclusion. Mathew did call me earlier today, but it was to ask if he'd have a problem signing over his unemployment check to Jeffrey. Jeffrey also called me today, but it was because I had already left work and he wanted to know he should wait until I was there to cash that check. Why do I bend over backwards to do everything I can for these people, and yet I only get a call from them when they want something? And why is it that I get that impression from most everybody I try to be friends with?
What am I doing wrong here? I think my mistake is trying to have friends.
David Selliman came in today. He's this older man who wants my balls. He was telling me today that he wanted to write a letter to my superiors about me to say how great I am, and I told him just to call my regional. He told me that he was going to call the regional and say the following: "There's this guy who is so hot he convinced me to bring seventy thousand to this bank, and I wondered if you had some pull with him so I can get some benefits for my money."
The unclefucker has no shame.
Tomorrow I'm going to find out if it's possible to renege on buying the condo. As long as the seller can't sue me or something for retracting my offer, I'm withdrawing.
Earlier, I went to take the final in my Anatomy class. I was talking to my buddy Mohamed before the test about music, and he wanted me to hear a new cd he just made of Lebanese music. After we took the test, we went to his car, and he had me listen to a portion of each song on the cd he had just made. While I was sitting there, I suddenly became really depressed. Sometimes, just being in close enough proximity to a normal person who can actually live his life like everybody else is enough to do it.