Tried for Murder and Self Discovery...
I had the weirdest..and scariest dream about Ryan when I was taking a nap eariler..
You see..Trina had said something to him, that pushed him over the edge..and said something like "you'll be sorry"..and walked off..I was chasing after him...yelling his name..and he wouldn't listen...he went to his truck to get something..and kept walking, it turns out that it was a gun..he then countinued to walk faster and faster to a barn..leaving me far behind in his tracks. I was searching franticly for him..then I heard a shot. I freaked. I ran the path that led to the barn, and saw him laying down..on his back with a gun wound in his head. temple to temple. I screamed. I ran to his, taking his bloody head in the arms and lap, his blood was spluring out so fast onto me..I was screaming "How could you do this, don't leave us.." Then Sandy his Mother came in...for some reason. She thought I had murdered her son. Anyway, I was put on trial for his death...Sandy did not want to face the fact that Ryan had taken his own life. What Mother would?
I wasn't eating; sleeping. Nothing. It scared the shit out of me...
They found me not guilty. Sandy was not happy.
So that was my dream.
*****
I saw Kevin Wed. night at the Bacaloriate [sp] Ya'll weren't lying when you said he looked good. He is tan and skinny. His smile has not changed a bit...and I'm so happy about that. When we saw each other afterwards..when the Graduates were lined up to greet everyone..he smiled that same big smile I'd fallen in love with, and have grown acustomed too seeing upon his face. He gave me a big hug. I've been thinking about it..in is presence, it seems I go back to being as I used to be before he left in February, I've changed since then. Have I not? I'm not so sure being around him is going to do me any good, it may make me feel good for a moment..but it definitely won't make me a better person. I've moved on from that. As I said before, in his presence..the old me comes back, and I really don't like her anymore. Little Bitch. [haha] I act like a little girl when I'm around him...
You see..Trina had said something to him, that pushed him over the edge..and said something like "you'll be sorry"..and walked off..I was chasing after him...yelling his name..and he wouldn't listen...he went to his truck to get something..and kept walking, it turns out that it was a gun..he then countinued to walk faster and faster to a barn..leaving me far behind in his tracks. I was searching franticly for him..then I heard a shot. I freaked. I ran the path that led to the barn, and saw him laying down..on his back with a gun wound in his head. temple to temple. I screamed. I ran to his, taking his bloody head in the arms and lap, his blood was spluring out so fast onto me..I was screaming "How could you do this, don't leave us.." Then Sandy his Mother came in...for some reason. She thought I had murdered her son. Anyway, I was put on trial for his death...Sandy did not want to face the fact that Ryan had taken his own life. What Mother would?
I wasn't eating; sleeping. Nothing. It scared the shit out of me...
They found me not guilty. Sandy was not happy.
So that was my dream.
*****
I saw Kevin Wed. night at the Bacaloriate [sp] Ya'll weren't lying when you said he looked good. He is tan and skinny. His smile has not changed a bit...and I'm so happy about that. When we saw each other afterwards..when the Graduates were lined up to greet everyone..he smiled that same big smile I'd fallen in love with, and have grown acustomed too seeing upon his face. He gave me a big hug. I've been thinking about it..in is presence, it seems I go back to being as I used to be before he left in February, I've changed since then. Have I not? I'm not so sure being around him is going to do me any good, it may make me feel good for a moment..but it definitely won't make me a better person. I've moved on from that. As I said before, in his presence..the old me comes back, and I really don't like her anymore. Little Bitch. [haha] I act like a little girl when I'm around him...