Rest in Peace
We're usually told that we don't know when we'll die, and that's mostly true when it's a premature death; things that aren't caused by ourselves such as accidents and homicides. There are some who know they're going to die, like being diagnosed with a chronic illness, which is also bad because of the anticipation. My grandpa was the latter. My uncle was the former. Both of them passed away because of health problems.
My grandpa was diagnosed with bile duct cancer in September 2011. I had just come home from New York when my uncle Eddie told me that my grandpa was in the hospital again. He was there before because he had jaundice, had been discharged, but went back to the hospital because of another complication. We didn't know if there was a serious reason for the jaundice at first, so they ran a few tests. It was a few days after when my mom told me the news about his cancer. It was hard to say how long he had left, but we knew it was only for another few months. I was taking him to his chemotherapy on Wednesdays the weeks after until he had to stay in the hospital again from complications again.
During that time, my uncle Eddie's pit bull died of old age. She went peacefully, laying down in her favorite sleeping position. My grandma noticed this when she was going to use the bathroom, but the dog was still laying in front of the door. She had pulled the mat from under her, but she still didn't move. I was asked to check, and I saw her tongue was out and that it was black. That's when my aunt called my uncle so he could say his goodbyes to her. November 16, 2011 at 11 years old.
Later that day, my grandpa called saying he was well enough to be discharged. Some of my family members were saying that old saying where our pit bull gave her life so our grandpa could live for longer. He had only stayed back at home for two days until he went back. I didn't visit him much, but my grandma visited him almost every day. She would stay with him for hours and stay until visiting hours were done, and I would pick her up. During Thanksgiving, we visited him at the hospital. My grandma brought him some do the food we had made then. Before leaving, I had said to him then "Mahal kita." I love you. In December, The last thing my grandpa ever said to me was "Merry Christmas." I laughed and said back to him, "Lolo, that's in a couple weeks!" I had hoped he could make it until then, but he didn't. He died December 12, 2011 at 79 years old.
Even though he was in his 70s, he would still walk down the block to the store because he wanted to buy something. The August before he was diagnosed, he had a foot infection that prevented him from walking around as much. He still didn't want to stay in one place, so he asked who was available to drop him off at the store. He also took care of himself pretty well; he had diabetes and monitored his food intake, and he also had his own light exercises to keep his heart healthy. My mom said that the doctor told her my grandpa had a good heart, and if it weren't for his cancer, he would have lived for another 10 years.
Nine months later, his son was taken. I don't know much about my uncle's death other than he had a heart attack and was taken to the ER. He had died that morning, but I didn't hear about it until the afternoon. What I'm curious about his cause of death. He liked talking about his past, how in high school he played so many sports. He was really athletic, and most people he knew in high school knew him from the teams he played on. After that, he mostly had jobs where he could move around such as his most recent job. He was a massage therapist at Club Sport. He had three children, all of them play sports, and he was even coach for his son's little league team. However, what I do know that for the past 12 months, he has been going through more stress than what he's usually under. While going through my grandpa's death, he was also going through a separation with the woman he'd been married to for over the past 15 years.
Their problems started in October. He moved out of the house and my mom offered him my room to stay in because I started staying at my aunt's house during the week for university. I didn't really question it, and I was a little upset because it was my room but I understood. He started moving his clothes out of his house into my room, so for a few months I stayed in my sisters' room for the weekend. He jokingly called me his "roommate" because he was using my room, and I went with it. His clothes eventually stayed in my room and he found somewhere to stay, and it was just last month in August when he finally took his clothes out of my room, staying with the woman he was currently dating.
Hearing about the news about him being in the ER really caught me by surprise. I had just come home from my morning class when I noticed my aunt and uncle were back home too. I was making food for my cousin when my aunt went to my grandma and said to her calmly for her to relax as well. She had told her that my uncle was in the emergency room because he had a heart attack. After my aunt was telling her to get dressed so she could go to the hospital too, she kept asking "Is he dead?!" She's really not one to cry easily, but she had shed a few tears then. Me and my uncle, the one I live with, took my cousins into his bedroom because we didn't want them to see our grandma panicking. That's when my uncle finally told me that he had passed away already. September 10, 2012 at age 48.
They didn't want to tell my grandma that because they knew she would have gone to the hospital then. I had to watch her while she was getting ready, and she kept saying things like "Jesus, Toy" and "I don't know." I don't blame her, because two deaths in under 12 months just puts a lot of unwanted stress on your body, no matter how calm you are; that's just our biological reaction. And with my grandma, both her husband and her only son were now gone. For my mom and her sisters, their dad and their only brother are now gone.
His funeral is on Friday, and he'll have viewings the days before that. I'll be able to say my goodbyes to him then.
My grandpa was diagnosed with bile duct cancer in September 2011. I had just come home from New York when my uncle Eddie told me that my grandpa was in the hospital again. He was there before because he had jaundice, had been discharged, but went back to the hospital because of another complication. We didn't know if there was a serious reason for the jaundice at first, so they ran a few tests. It was a few days after when my mom told me the news about his cancer. It was hard to say how long he had left, but we knew it was only for another few months. I was taking him to his chemotherapy on Wednesdays the weeks after until he had to stay in the hospital again from complications again.
During that time, my uncle Eddie's pit bull died of old age. She went peacefully, laying down in her favorite sleeping position. My grandma noticed this when she was going to use the bathroom, but the dog was still laying in front of the door. She had pulled the mat from under her, but she still didn't move. I was asked to check, and I saw her tongue was out and that it was black. That's when my aunt called my uncle so he could say his goodbyes to her. November 16, 2011 at 11 years old.
Later that day, my grandpa called saying he was well enough to be discharged. Some of my family members were saying that old saying where our pit bull gave her life so our grandpa could live for longer. He had only stayed back at home for two days until he went back. I didn't visit him much, but my grandma visited him almost every day. She would stay with him for hours and stay until visiting hours were done, and I would pick her up. During Thanksgiving, we visited him at the hospital. My grandma brought him some do the food we had made then. Before leaving, I had said to him then "Mahal kita." I love you. In December, The last thing my grandpa ever said to me was "Merry Christmas." I laughed and said back to him, "Lolo, that's in a couple weeks!" I had hoped he could make it until then, but he didn't. He died December 12, 2011 at 79 years old.
Even though he was in his 70s, he would still walk down the block to the store because he wanted to buy something. The August before he was diagnosed, he had a foot infection that prevented him from walking around as much. He still didn't want to stay in one place, so he asked who was available to drop him off at the store. He also took care of himself pretty well; he had diabetes and monitored his food intake, and he also had his own light exercises to keep his heart healthy. My mom said that the doctor told her my grandpa had a good heart, and if it weren't for his cancer, he would have lived for another 10 years.
Nine months later, his son was taken. I don't know much about my uncle's death other than he had a heart attack and was taken to the ER. He had died that morning, but I didn't hear about it until the afternoon. What I'm curious about his cause of death. He liked talking about his past, how in high school he played so many sports. He was really athletic, and most people he knew in high school knew him from the teams he played on. After that, he mostly had jobs where he could move around such as his most recent job. He was a massage therapist at Club Sport. He had three children, all of them play sports, and he was even coach for his son's little league team. However, what I do know that for the past 12 months, he has been going through more stress than what he's usually under. While going through my grandpa's death, he was also going through a separation with the woman he'd been married to for over the past 15 years.
Their problems started in October. He moved out of the house and my mom offered him my room to stay in because I started staying at my aunt's house during the week for university. I didn't really question it, and I was a little upset because it was my room but I understood. He started moving his clothes out of his house into my room, so for a few months I stayed in my sisters' room for the weekend. He jokingly called me his "roommate" because he was using my room, and I went with it. His clothes eventually stayed in my room and he found somewhere to stay, and it was just last month in August when he finally took his clothes out of my room, staying with the woman he was currently dating.
Hearing about the news about him being in the ER really caught me by surprise. I had just come home from my morning class when I noticed my aunt and uncle were back home too. I was making food for my cousin when my aunt went to my grandma and said to her calmly for her to relax as well. She had told her that my uncle was in the emergency room because he had a heart attack. After my aunt was telling her to get dressed so she could go to the hospital too, she kept asking "Is he dead?!" She's really not one to cry easily, but she had shed a few tears then. Me and my uncle, the one I live with, took my cousins into his bedroom because we didn't want them to see our grandma panicking. That's when my uncle finally told me that he had passed away already. September 10, 2012 at age 48.
They didn't want to tell my grandma that because they knew she would have gone to the hospital then. I had to watch her while she was getting ready, and she kept saying things like "Jesus, Toy" and "I don't know." I don't blame her, because two deaths in under 12 months just puts a lot of unwanted stress on your body, no matter how calm you are; that's just our biological reaction. And with my grandma, both her husband and her only son were now gone. For my mom and her sisters, their dad and their only brother are now gone.
His funeral is on Friday, and he'll have viewings the days before that. I'll be able to say my goodbyes to him then.