Nowhere is Safe
Today a man called me trying to find out if someone he knew was in the hospital. Technically this doesn't constitute the type of emergency I'm here to respond to, but I'm happy to help people out because I understand that no one wants to be desperate enough to call the hospital in the first place. I got another one of those calls today, and as tends to happen, the guy filled the time it took me to look for the woman he was calling about by explaining to me why he was worried.
The "lady friend" in question came over to his house three days ago and... you know... spent the night. They were making up after a big fight, and according to him everything went really well "if you know what I mean." However, the next morning they were both shocked and dismayed to discover that she had gotten her period in the middle of the night. A bad one too,apparently, because his new mattress, very expensive sheets, and the carpet leading from the bed to the bathroom were ruined. The last time he saw her was that morning when she caught a bus back into town so she could get money from her bank to pay for the stuff her "lady troubles" had ruined.
I managed to contain my laughter long enough to tell him that she wasn't
here, but only just. I've never been the recipient of the truly spectacular girl revenge, and I hope to keep it that way, but I do enjoy hearing the stories.
The "lady friend" in question came over to his house three days ago and... you know... spent the night. They were making up after a big fight, and according to him everything went really well "if you know what I mean." However, the next morning they were both shocked and dismayed to discover that she had gotten her period in the middle of the night. A bad one too,apparently, because his new mattress, very expensive sheets, and the carpet leading from the bed to the bathroom were ruined. The last time he saw her was that morning when she caught a bus back into town so she could get money from her bank to pay for the stuff her "lady troubles" had ruined.
I managed to contain my laughter long enough to tell him that she wasn't
here, but only just. I've never been the recipient of the truly spectacular girl revenge, and I hope to keep it that way, but I do enjoy hearing the stories.