Oh such torturous things...
I feel so terrible today.
there has been such a strong urge of me wanting to kill every single being around me.
and I have so many reasonable excuses to do that.
First, there was this girl from school,
We saw her crying, and when we asked why, she told us that it's because this boy doesn't notice her or doesn't flirt back.
It just pisses me off, the way how easily people can break down, how fragile they are.
they obviously haven't experienced pain.
I for one, has to deal with a drunk dad and a perfectionist mom and to top all of that off I have to take care of my grandma and my little niece every single day.
They have no idea of the nights I have spent, 2:30 in the morning, dealing with a drunkard father who's speech have been so slurred that his lies have spilled in 4 different languages.
and a mom that wants a perfect daughter, she doesn't think I'm humble or good enough, she never did.
She never said that she didn't want me, but I can feel that she doesn't.
and my grandmother, we turned our entire living room into a fucking hospital, complete with oxygen tanks but no air conditioning, she's too sensitive to temperatures.
Our house has been so fucked up that literally the only place I can breathe freely in is the roof, that's where I get my mind off...
People from school don't know how broken I am
how many nights I spent
cutting
crying
wishing to die..
they never did and they never will...
school has been full of bullshit
full of people who will never understand what I've been through
and it just sucks,
I can't tell anyone, I have a few acquaintances but they won't understand.
it's just so weird you know
how fragile people around me are.
how they could create so much drama on such a little matter.
and here I am
still broken and numb from everything.
besides no one will know that I replaced those mints with pills, no one.
there has been such a strong urge of me wanting to kill every single being around me.
and I have so many reasonable excuses to do that.
First, there was this girl from school,
We saw her crying, and when we asked why, she told us that it's because this boy doesn't notice her or doesn't flirt back.
It just pisses me off, the way how easily people can break down, how fragile they are.
they obviously haven't experienced pain.
I for one, has to deal with a drunk dad and a perfectionist mom and to top all of that off I have to take care of my grandma and my little niece every single day.
They have no idea of the nights I have spent, 2:30 in the morning, dealing with a drunkard father who's speech have been so slurred that his lies have spilled in 4 different languages.
and a mom that wants a perfect daughter, she doesn't think I'm humble or good enough, she never did.
She never said that she didn't want me, but I can feel that she doesn't.
and my grandmother, we turned our entire living room into a fucking hospital, complete with oxygen tanks but no air conditioning, she's too sensitive to temperatures.
Our house has been so fucked up that literally the only place I can breathe freely in is the roof, that's where I get my mind off...
People from school don't know how broken I am
how many nights I spent
cutting
crying
wishing to die..
they never did and they never will...
school has been full of bullshit
full of people who will never understand what I've been through
and it just sucks,
I can't tell anyone, I have a few acquaintances but they won't understand.
it's just so weird you know
how fragile people around me are.
how they could create so much drama on such a little matter.
and here I am
still broken and numb from everything.
besides no one will know that I replaced those mints with pills, no one.