Harry Potter fic alert
Okay, so a few weeks ago a few of you might have heard about this Harry Potter fic that I was writing that involved Jell-O wrestling. Well, its finished and has been semi-betaed by Verena weyoun21 (I wanted to make sure I had spelled all the names right cause I was too lazy to go look it up... I also wasn't sure if there were hard boiled eggs in German Potato salad, which she informed me on. :D ), so I suppose its ready enough to share with you all. :)
Anyhoo, here you can find
CristinAnne: *giggles really really long*
CristinAnne: /My, how time flies when you're having fun,/ Harry drawled. /I wonder if old Tom is bringing a casserole for dinner. I'm positively famished./
/No, he always brings potato salad,/ Snape replied. /It's the curse of the Death Eaters; lines get crossed, and everyone brings potato salad. Except for Malfoy, who always brings a Jell-O mould. But it's lime, and no one ever eats it./
pegasusrider2002: maybe I should put one of the first two in...
And < snort >
pegasusrider2002: Malfoy and Jell-O...
pegasusrider2002: < also giggles >
CristinAnne: I think the image of Lord Voldemort making potato salad is what really got me. *giggles*
pegasusrider2002: Actually, I was laughing at the Malfoy jell-o wrestling in my brain
pegasusrider2002: and then it transferred to Voldemort also wrestling, but in potato salad instead
pegasusrider2002: Yeah, I need sleep
CristinAnne: Oh, gah. Now I just pictured Malfoy and Lord Voldemort wrestling in Jell-O while Snape is throwing potato salad at them.
pegasusrider2002: < SNORT!!! !>
pegasusrider2002: Oh, god, I think I just scared the dog with that one
CristinAnne: *goes to save that one to the quote file*
pegasusrider2002: lol
pegasusrider2002: Hey, every picnic needs entertainment, no?
CristinAnne: Oh yeah. *g*
pegasusrider2002: < snort > now all three are wrestling in one of those little pink plastic tubs with the fish on it with the rest of the Harry Potter Fandom looking on and cheering
pegasusrider2002: in a park, with a slide and a swingset in the background behind them...
pegasusrider2002: Damn Malfoy and his Jell-o!
CristinAnne: A trailer park!
CristinAnne: *giggles*
pegasusrider2002: < snickers >
pegasusrider2002: Dude, how sad is it my muse is now trying to make me write this...
CristinAnne: *snerk*
pegasusrider2002: < sends her muse over to Cristin > Go pester her! She's the one that likes the boys playing together!
CristinAnne: *giggles*
pegasusrider2002: < fights the urge to open a word document > NO, DAMMIT!
pegasusrider2002: < goes to stuff her muse back in the closet >
CristinAnne: *enables*
pegasusrider2002: enables what?
pegasusrider2002: Dude, I feel I am being really slow here
CristinAnne: I'm being an enabler? Write, write!
pegasusrider2002: Oh
pegasusrider2002: < also stuffs Cristin in the close t>
pegasusrider2002: :p
CristinAnne: *comes out of the closet* (pst! I'm gay! *g*)
pegasusrider2002: < snort >
CristinAnne: Sorry, couldn't resist.
Yeah, leave it to me and Cristin to twist a perfectally innocent line in a Harry Potter fic into Jell-O wrestling... :D
Aaaaand, finally,
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all other characters in this fic belong to J.K. Rowling... I'm not making any money off of this, I'm just playing with her characters a bit. :)
Summary: Harry and Draco argue over the best kind of Jell-O, and Snape gets caught in the cross-fire
Archival: Ask and ye shall receive, though I doubt anyone will really care to archive it anyways. :)
Notes: This is just pure fun and silliness with non-sexual boy-on-boy action. And, I apologize ahead of time to any Snape-lovers for the mess I make of your boy... And yes, Voldemort is meant to read like one of the Fab 5. :D Also, I appoligogize to anyone who might take insult from my not-so-subtile diss of German Potato Salad...
Feedback: is always welcome. (aka, comment, dammit! I'll give you a cookie if you doooo... ;) )
Hope you enjoy!
~*~
The day had taken a dramatic (yet highly entertaining) turn for the worst. What had started out as the normal enough (or as normal as anything coming from Hogwarts can get) school-wide picnic Dumbledore insisted on having every spring, ended with two teachers, several students, a dark lord, and one decidedly unlucky giant squid, covered with an assortment of fruit-filled Jell-Os and homemade potato salad.
It was no secret that the ever-growing conflict between Draco and Harry had been getting worse as of late, but no one ever even *considered* that the rivalry could come to such drastic heights. But when Harry showed up to the picnic with a blue-raspberry Jell-o mould to share, and Draco came with his lime-and-gelatin creation - both of whom were absolutely certain that their flavour was the best - the conflict reached breaking point.
Both of the poor, helpless side dishes went flying as the two teenagers launched themselves at each other, the blue one partially hitting the unfortunate Professor McGonagall while the rest of it flew over her shoulder to splat against the giant squid - as it had been laying in the shallows observing the events at the invitation of Hagrid - and the green one landing squarely on the head of a very un-amused Snape (at least the green suited him). The two boys, heedless of anything except how much damage they could do to each other in the shortest amount of time, carelessly rolled into the legs of the flimsy card table which held the rest of the desserts, knocking it and it's contents (in this case, several more jell-o moulds... You'd think wizards would be more creative) onto themselves and the ground around them.
It was at this time that Lord Voldemort, who had been closely watching the festivities (who *wouldn't* want to watch two pretty boys wrestling in a pile of jell-o?) from a distance, took advantage of the distraction the unplanned jell-o wrestling match created and tried to slip unnoticed to the buffet table in order to replace one of the hot dishes with his special-recipe German Potato Salad. Using a less potent version of the mind-controlling spell, it would make anyone who ate it more susceptible to becoming one of his deatheaters (and he had his hopes on that blond bombshell Draco... Can we say YUM!? I mean, he was already halfway there with his whole traitorous family genes, how hard could it be?) Voldemort was quite proud of his little concoction, too. Anyone who could make German Potato Salad taste good *and* control the minds of his enemy at the same time deserved a metal, or so he told anyone who ever asked about the recipe.
However, even an evil mastermind and extraordinary cook like himself can make mistakes, and today his was to wear his new designer boots with 5 centimeter heels underneath his over-long silk robe of a burnt amber... As if the robe by itself wasn't all "Hell-o, look at the diva!" (even if it was a *smashing* colour on him), he just had to step on the hem of it with those bloody boots and trip, falling face first in the beef stroganoff while his beloved potato salad went sailing through the air, baptizing anyone in its path with potatoes and mayonnaise, including Harry and Draco on the ground where they continued to try and convince each other of the better Jell-O flavour using their fists, and Professor Snape as the now half empty bowl landed upside down over his head as if drawn there by some gravitational force. Little pieces of sliced potato and hard-boiled egg joined the pieces of lime and green gel already dripping from his hair and face as the now totally empty bowl fell from his head and onto the ground with a hallow thunk. The frown on the man's face was so large it looked as if it would decapitate his head from his body, so it wasn't surprising when his outrageous squawk of "THAT IS ENOUGH!" was loud enough not only to make the giant squid - who was still trying to get the sticky blue Jell-O from his suckers, - do his own version of a startled jump (or in this case, a startled squish), it was also enough to grab the attention of the two teens fighting at his feet. He reached down to forcefully separate the two boys, shoving them so hard into the surrounding crowd that each was air-born for a moment, before he reached to pull Diva Dark Lord out of the side dish by the back of his flamboyant feather-ringed collar before throwing him in an ungraceful, stroganoff-covered, burnt-amber heap at Dumbledore's feet.
"You," he pointed a Jell-O smeared finger first at Dumbledore and then at Voldemort, "Do something with *that*!"
He turned, "YOU," he continued, glaring at both Harry and Draco in turn, "CLEAN UP THIS BLOODY MESS!"
Then he turned one last time to face the crowd between him and Hogwarts, "And YOU," he directed his scorn at one of the innocent bystanders, who also had bits of potato salad here and there on his robes, "Get *out* of my BLOODY WAY!!!" He then pushed his way through the crowd, anyone unlucky enough to be caught in is vengeful glare visibly shrinking away from the Potion Master, even in his current Jell-O and potato-salad covered state as he stalked toward the school.
"AND STRAWBERRY IS THE BEST BLOODY JELL-O FLAVOUR!" he screamed over his shoulder once he broke free of the gathered students and teachers.
""Huh..." Ron Weasley stated after a moment as he, Hermione, a slightly sticky Harry, and the rest of the crowd stared at the retreating back of their Potions professor, "I always pictured him as the sour apple type."
Anyhoo, here you can find
CristinAnne: *giggles really really long*
CristinAnne: /My, how time flies when you're having fun,/ Harry drawled. /I wonder if old Tom is bringing a casserole for dinner. I'm positively famished./
/No, he always brings potato salad,/ Snape replied. /It's the curse of the Death Eaters; lines get crossed, and everyone brings potato salad. Except for Malfoy, who always brings a Jell-O mould. But it's lime, and no one ever eats it./
pegasusrider2002: maybe I should put one of the first two in...
And < snort >
pegasusrider2002: Malfoy and Jell-O...
pegasusrider2002: < also giggles >
CristinAnne: I think the image of Lord Voldemort making potato salad is what really got me. *giggles*
pegasusrider2002: Actually, I was laughing at the Malfoy jell-o wrestling in my brain
pegasusrider2002: and then it transferred to Voldemort also wrestling, but in potato salad instead
pegasusrider2002: Yeah, I need sleep
CristinAnne: Oh, gah. Now I just pictured Malfoy and Lord Voldemort wrestling in Jell-O while Snape is throwing potato salad at them.
pegasusrider2002: < SNORT!!! !>
pegasusrider2002: Oh, god, I think I just scared the dog with that one
CristinAnne: *goes to save that one to the quote file*
pegasusrider2002: lol
pegasusrider2002: Hey, every picnic needs entertainment, no?
CristinAnne: Oh yeah. *g*
pegasusrider2002: < snort > now all three are wrestling in one of those little pink plastic tubs with the fish on it with the rest of the Harry Potter Fandom looking on and cheering
pegasusrider2002: in a park, with a slide and a swingset in the background behind them...
pegasusrider2002: Damn Malfoy and his Jell-o!
CristinAnne: A trailer park!
CristinAnne: *giggles*
pegasusrider2002: < snickers >
pegasusrider2002: Dude, how sad is it my muse is now trying to make me write this...
CristinAnne: *snerk*
pegasusrider2002: < sends her muse over to Cristin > Go pester her! She's the one that likes the boys playing together!
CristinAnne: *giggles*
pegasusrider2002: < fights the urge to open a word document > NO, DAMMIT!
pegasusrider2002: < goes to stuff her muse back in the closet >
CristinAnne: *enables*
pegasusrider2002: enables what?
pegasusrider2002: Dude, I feel I am being really slow here
CristinAnne: I'm being an enabler? Write, write!
pegasusrider2002: Oh
pegasusrider2002: < also stuffs Cristin in the close t>
pegasusrider2002: :p
CristinAnne: *comes out of the closet* (pst! I'm gay! *g*)
pegasusrider2002: < snort >
CristinAnne: Sorry, couldn't resist.
Yeah, leave it to me and Cristin to twist a perfectally innocent line in a Harry Potter fic into Jell-O wrestling... :D
Aaaaand, finally,
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all other characters in this fic belong to J.K. Rowling... I'm not making any money off of this, I'm just playing with her characters a bit. :)
Summary: Harry and Draco argue over the best kind of Jell-O, and Snape gets caught in the cross-fire
Archival: Ask and ye shall receive, though I doubt anyone will really care to archive it anyways. :)
Notes: This is just pure fun and silliness with non-sexual boy-on-boy action. And, I apologize ahead of time to any Snape-lovers for the mess I make of your boy... And yes, Voldemort is meant to read like one of the Fab 5. :D Also, I appoligogize to anyone who might take insult from my not-so-subtile diss of German Potato Salad...
Feedback: is always welcome. (aka, comment, dammit! I'll give you a cookie if you doooo... ;) )
Hope you enjoy!
~*~
The day had taken a dramatic (yet highly entertaining) turn for the worst. What had started out as the normal enough (or as normal as anything coming from Hogwarts can get) school-wide picnic Dumbledore insisted on having every spring, ended with two teachers, several students, a dark lord, and one decidedly unlucky giant squid, covered with an assortment of fruit-filled Jell-Os and homemade potato salad.
It was no secret that the ever-growing conflict between Draco and Harry had been getting worse as of late, but no one ever even *considered* that the rivalry could come to such drastic heights. But when Harry showed up to the picnic with a blue-raspberry Jell-o mould to share, and Draco came with his lime-and-gelatin creation - both of whom were absolutely certain that their flavour was the best - the conflict reached breaking point.
Both of the poor, helpless side dishes went flying as the two teenagers launched themselves at each other, the blue one partially hitting the unfortunate Professor McGonagall while the rest of it flew over her shoulder to splat against the giant squid - as it had been laying in the shallows observing the events at the invitation of Hagrid - and the green one landing squarely on the head of a very un-amused Snape (at least the green suited him). The two boys, heedless of anything except how much damage they could do to each other in the shortest amount of time, carelessly rolled into the legs of the flimsy card table which held the rest of the desserts, knocking it and it's contents (in this case, several more jell-o moulds... You'd think wizards would be more creative) onto themselves and the ground around them.
It was at this time that Lord Voldemort, who had been closely watching the festivities (who *wouldn't* want to watch two pretty boys wrestling in a pile of jell-o?) from a distance, took advantage of the distraction the unplanned jell-o wrestling match created and tried to slip unnoticed to the buffet table in order to replace one of the hot dishes with his special-recipe German Potato Salad. Using a less potent version of the mind-controlling spell, it would make anyone who ate it more susceptible to becoming one of his deatheaters (and he had his hopes on that blond bombshell Draco... Can we say YUM!? I mean, he was already halfway there with his whole traitorous family genes, how hard could it be?) Voldemort was quite proud of his little concoction, too. Anyone who could make German Potato Salad taste good *and* control the minds of his enemy at the same time deserved a metal, or so he told anyone who ever asked about the recipe.
However, even an evil mastermind and extraordinary cook like himself can make mistakes, and today his was to wear his new designer boots with 5 centimeter heels underneath his over-long silk robe of a burnt amber... As if the robe by itself wasn't all "Hell-o, look at the diva!" (even if it was a *smashing* colour on him), he just had to step on the hem of it with those bloody boots and trip, falling face first in the beef stroganoff while his beloved potato salad went sailing through the air, baptizing anyone in its path with potatoes and mayonnaise, including Harry and Draco on the ground where they continued to try and convince each other of the better Jell-O flavour using their fists, and Professor Snape as the now half empty bowl landed upside down over his head as if drawn there by some gravitational force. Little pieces of sliced potato and hard-boiled egg joined the pieces of lime and green gel already dripping from his hair and face as the now totally empty bowl fell from his head and onto the ground with a hallow thunk. The frown on the man's face was so large it looked as if it would decapitate his head from his body, so it wasn't surprising when his outrageous squawk of "THAT IS ENOUGH!" was loud enough not only to make the giant squid - who was still trying to get the sticky blue Jell-O from his suckers, - do his own version of a startled jump (or in this case, a startled squish), it was also enough to grab the attention of the two teens fighting at his feet. He reached down to forcefully separate the two boys, shoving them so hard into the surrounding crowd that each was air-born for a moment, before he reached to pull Diva Dark Lord out of the side dish by the back of his flamboyant feather-ringed collar before throwing him in an ungraceful, stroganoff-covered, burnt-amber heap at Dumbledore's feet.
"You," he pointed a Jell-O smeared finger first at Dumbledore and then at Voldemort, "Do something with *that*!"
He turned, "YOU," he continued, glaring at both Harry and Draco in turn, "CLEAN UP THIS BLOODY MESS!"
Then he turned one last time to face the crowd between him and Hogwarts, "And YOU," he directed his scorn at one of the innocent bystanders, who also had bits of potato salad here and there on his robes, "Get *out* of my BLOODY WAY!!!" He then pushed his way through the crowd, anyone unlucky enough to be caught in is vengeful glare visibly shrinking away from the Potion Master, even in his current Jell-O and potato-salad covered state as he stalked toward the school.
"AND STRAWBERRY IS THE BEST BLOODY JELL-O FLAVOUR!" he screamed over his shoulder once he broke free of the gathered students and teachers.
""Huh..." Ron Weasley stated after a moment as he, Hermione, a slightly sticky Harry, and the rest of the crowd stared at the retreating back of their Potions professor, "I always pictured him as the sour apple type."