(no subject)

Jan 13, 2006 12:35

There's a lot of negative energy trapped in this place.

I'm cleaning and there's this great sadness welling in me. Tomorrow we will be in our new place and life will renew and, hopefully, change. Being on my second day off to work soley on moving shit, I'm feeling an added shot of depression. I feel like the world's worst teacher. I think my sick days are at -5 at this point.

Blech.

The bedroom is going well. I'm just feeling very hopeless. I have to shake myself out of my funk.

I smoke and drink way too much for my mental health.

Matt's right - I need to stop hating myself. I just realized that I've been hating myself for so fucking long that it's difficult to change.

I'm moving to a place of intense energy. I think we will be able to harness it positively. I think I will be able to reform friendships. With a sinking sensation, I feel I've wasted the better part of two years. Nothing to do but turn my eyes forward.

Onward and upward. Yar.
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