my gift to you
i can only imagine how much you must have hated me for leaving you. leaving you so alone. and i hate you right now. i mean you fluctuate like no other. i know i do to but at least im trying. i really am.
for the first time in my life im being honest. i dont lie like i used to. i dont even think i lie at all. Period.
justin has taught me a lot. about how to handle situations. about how to handle people. about how to see things from an unemotional perspective. and God do i need that. here i went in thinking i could help him, when it ended up reversed.
youre in my dreams. youre...youre everywhere. i wont lie. i stopped that ( see above statements )
and im sorry that im hurting you by calling you, if that is even hurting you. which im sure its not since youre having so much fun with so much people having so many parties. why werent u like that with me? i dont understand. why is it that you put way more effort into life?
and as for the family. well. even i had the ability to not get arrested id kick the shit out of your sister for all the times she was selfish, made me feel uncomfortable, made an idiot out of herself, and took pictures of her conceited being. and thatd be a lot of times. cuz there were a lot of pictures.
yeayea dont be fooled by all that. trying to hide whats really hurting you. you opened up to me that night. and being in your arms never felt so good. i care for you. and im happy caras not such a selfish bitch anymore since it took you being so broken up over me and your friends to open her eyes. people have emotions? no fucking way! the world isnt all about cara? NO WAY! holy shit. what a fucking revelation.
i hate people like that. and i feel youre becoming one of them. and youre still my friend. and yes theres a residue of emotion about how i felt about you. and ya know what i wanted to be with you again that one night when i was at your house. i really did. but you threw it all away again. and then we were ok. and then you threw it all away. dont you listen to silent mike? he even said to keep in touch. but where are you? wheres mike? oh hes too fucking busy with his life to talk to the person that meant everything to him for 4 yrs. even if i hated you id still make time to talk to you. if u told me ud talk to me tomorrow id say ok. but no. you didnt. you dont have time for me. or yourself. and your just going to be like that forever. andrews in touch with himself, but You?! ahhh fuck no. you dont have a clue. the moment you had a opportunity to really find yourself you hide behind new friends and new chicks.
AND YOU ADMITTED IT TO ME.
so stop being fake. stop not being you. because i cant watch you be like this.
so im making you something.
something i said id make for you a long time ago.
and when you get it
i hope you cry
i hope if anything
you realize
for the first time in my life im being honest. i dont lie like i used to. i dont even think i lie at all. Period.
justin has taught me a lot. about how to handle situations. about how to handle people. about how to see things from an unemotional perspective. and God do i need that. here i went in thinking i could help him, when it ended up reversed.
youre in my dreams. youre...youre everywhere. i wont lie. i stopped that ( see above statements )
and im sorry that im hurting you by calling you, if that is even hurting you. which im sure its not since youre having so much fun with so much people having so many parties. why werent u like that with me? i dont understand. why is it that you put way more effort into life?
and as for the family. well. even i had the ability to not get arrested id kick the shit out of your sister for all the times she was selfish, made me feel uncomfortable, made an idiot out of herself, and took pictures of her conceited being. and thatd be a lot of times. cuz there were a lot of pictures.
yeayea dont be fooled by all that. trying to hide whats really hurting you. you opened up to me that night. and being in your arms never felt so good. i care for you. and im happy caras not such a selfish bitch anymore since it took you being so broken up over me and your friends to open her eyes. people have emotions? no fucking way! the world isnt all about cara? NO WAY! holy shit. what a fucking revelation.
i hate people like that. and i feel youre becoming one of them. and youre still my friend. and yes theres a residue of emotion about how i felt about you. and ya know what i wanted to be with you again that one night when i was at your house. i really did. but you threw it all away again. and then we were ok. and then you threw it all away. dont you listen to silent mike? he even said to keep in touch. but where are you? wheres mike? oh hes too fucking busy with his life to talk to the person that meant everything to him for 4 yrs. even if i hated you id still make time to talk to you. if u told me ud talk to me tomorrow id say ok. but no. you didnt. you dont have time for me. or yourself. and your just going to be like that forever. andrews in touch with himself, but You?! ahhh fuck no. you dont have a clue. the moment you had a opportunity to really find yourself you hide behind new friends and new chicks.
AND YOU ADMITTED IT TO ME.
so stop being fake. stop not being you. because i cant watch you be like this.
so im making you something.
something i said id make for you a long time ago.
and when you get it
i hope you cry
i hope if anything
you realize