TWDW Ficathon Fic #1: Paris
Title: Paris
Author: reina_isabella
Gift for: Scap3goat
Rating: 15 / pg-13
Pairing: Nine/Rose, Nine/Jack (implied)
Word count: 4087
Summary: Jack is keeping secrets.
Spoilers: Nothing beyond the obvious.
Author's Notes: Written for the twdw_ficathon as a gift for Scap3goat, who requested: a secret Jack Harkness harbours (bonus for Jack's pregnancy), some kind of voyeurism, and the clicking noise of a keyboard. (One of 3 totally unconnected fics that came from that, actually.) Set between "The Doctor Dances" and "The Parting of the Ways," and beta'd by the shining ray of light and grammar that is Kimchi the betagoddess.
PARIS
"Vous cherchez quelqu'un en particulier, Monsieur? Ou simplement quelqu'un?"
"Hmm? Oh - heh, thanks love," the Doctor smiled at her, "but I am looking for someone in particular, yes." The woman blinked prettily at him and made a moue.
"C'est dommage, Monsieur." She - or was it he? Between the rouge and the wig and the dim gaslight of the café the Doctor couldn't tell for certain - ran a gloved finger down his jaw. "Alors, à bientôt, peut-être?" she purred, and sashayed away. The Doctor watched the slim figure disappear into the crowd and smoke of the small, hot room and thought, If Jack is in here, I'm going to have a hell of a time getting him to leave.
People pressed against him from all sides and in the flickering orange light and shifting cigarette haze the rose-pink walls seemed to throb with a pulse of their own. A crowd of young men in shirtsleeves argued loudly at a table nearby, snatches of Latin and Greek thrown into the shouted French as they thumped the tabletop and swore at one another. A tightly-corseted girl danced by, her bosom rouged and her eyes glassy, in the arms of a woman in a slim and immaculate dark suit. The Doctor stepped aside as a man in red satin pants stumbled past, the gas flames reflecting off the sheen of sweat on his bare chest and back, and collapsed across the brocaded lap of an enormous woman holding court from a low divan. The woman roared with laughter and swatted the man's red-satin behind. A hell of a time, indeed, the Doctor thought, and moved off through the crowd.
He finally caught sight of him in a far corner - a half-empty bottle of green liquid at his elbow, an almost-full glass in his hand, and a young soldier leaning across the table to sip the liquor from his lips. "Jack!" the Doctor called. Jack looked up, focusing his eyes with difficulty. A catlike grin spread across his face as the Doctor crossed the room towards him. Jack raised his glass in greeting.
"Doctor," he purred, "care for some absinthe? We only have one glass, but we seem to have figured out a way around that. This is Jules." The young soldier glared jealously at the Doctor and tightened his grip on Jack's thigh.
"Enchanté," he muttered.
"Yeah, hi to you, too," the Doctor nodded, and turned back to Jack. "We need to go."
"We've only just gotten here."
"Right. And so has something else. Back to the TARDIS, now. I need your help."
Jack sighed and handed the glass to the soldier. "Sorry, kid. I have to go." The young man glanced at the Doctor and bent to whisper in Jack's ear. Jack groaned and looked over pleadingly. "Can't I have an hour?" he asked. "Half an hour?"
Arms folded, the Doctor glared at him. "Now."
"Six minutes in the alley out back?" he muttered.
"Now."
Jack glared back momentarily, grabbed Jules roughly by the back of the neck and kissed him savagely. "All right. Ready?" he asked, standing and pulling on his coat. The Doctor looked quickly away.
"'Course."
"Let's go, then." Jack grabbed the bottle from the table and winked at Jules. " 'Night."
"Au revoir, Capitaine."
"I sincerely hope so," Jack called over his shoulder as he led the way out of the café.
Outside rain hissed on the pavement and the lights from the windows made shifting patterns on the wet ground. Jack paused to turn up the collar of his coat and waited for the Doctor to push through the crowd taking shelter under the striped awning of the café. "Okay," he said as they set off down the dark street. "Tell me. What's the big bad this time? And where's Rose?"
"In the TARDIS," the Doctor told him. "Sleeping off five glasses of champagne. Honestly, the two of you," he complained, eyeing the bottle in Jack's hand, "it's like living with a pair of Colufroxes."
"What's a - no, never mind," Jack said. "Just tell me what we're up against."
The Doctor glanced at Jack out of the corner of his eye. His dark hair was inky in the rain, his blue eyes shining like the wet pavement. "Dunno, exactly," the Doctor said. "But whatever it is, it followed us here from Sarstak Five. I think - "
"Wait a minute." Jack halted and turned to him. "You're not talking about our shadow, are you? That little blip on the sensors that hasn't done a damn bit of harm or damage - that hasn't actually done anything other than follow us around on our last few trips? Is that what you're talking about?"
"Yup."
"I don't believe you!" Jack stomped off a few paces and turned to face the Doctor from the flickering pool of light beneath a street lamp. He pointed back in the direction of the café. "That boy just got back from six months' duty in Morocco! Do you have any idea of the kinds of things a boy like that can learn to do in Morocco in six months? You don't think this could have waited until tomorrow? Or at least for an hour?" He kicked the iron post of the street lamp in frustration and a dull clang echoed through the nearly-empty street. "I bet you made Rose leave the opera early for this, too, didn't you?"
"Not at all."
"I bet you did," Jack grumbled, striding off down the street once more. As the Doctor caught up with him at the end of the block Jack muttered, "Just because you're in a mood doesn't mean that the humans can't have a night off once in a while. You didn't have to drag me away from - from that café," he insisted, noting the Doctor's wry glance, "and you know very well all Rose has talked about for ages is going to the opera in Paris."
"I did not make Rose leave the opera, I had to carry her out after the second act and put her to bed. Which is when I noticed that we've been followed again; which I happen to think - " Jack opened his mouth to interrupt " - which I happen to think is worth looking into. Immediately. And since I am the one in charge, we're looking into it. Immediately." They reached the end of the cobbled alley where the TARDIS waited, wet and shining in the rain. Jack paused, his hand on the door, and glared at the Doctor.
"Is there a word in Gallifreyan for 'wet blanket'?" he asked, eyes blazing. "Or 'stick in the mud'?" He shoved open the door and stepped into the ship. "How about just 'No fucking fun at all'?"
The Doctor passed him expressionlessly, heading for the corridor, and called over his shoulder. "Get started. Internal sensors. It's here's somewhere."
"And where the hell are you going?"
"Check on Rose. Get to work."
Jack slammed down into a chair. "Yes, Doctor," he grumbled in exasperation after the retreating figure, shrugging out of his coat and turning to the console of the TARDIS. Well; it was small consolation, he reflected, but at least he had the chance to get his hands on the ship for a few minutes - next to the Time Lord himself, it was the most maddeningly alluring thing Jack had ever met, and being alone with it was almost as enticing as being alone with the Doctor.
"More so," Jack muttered, running a finger along the console. "He's in a hell of a mood." The ship seemed to hum in response and Jack asked, half expecting the TARDIS to answer, "What's his problem, anyway?" Unsurprisingly, the ship made no reply; shaking his head, he adjusted a monitor screen in front of him and got to work.
For a long time the only sounds in the control room were the gentle thrum of the ship and the clicking of the keyboard under his fingers as he searched through sensor data for their silent stalker. Brief shadows appeared here and there - the smallest spike on the instruments, a blip, a murmur. Something nudged at Jack from the back of his mind ... familiar, somehow, but what? ... why not just tell the Doctor, let the one in charge figure it out -
Where was the Doctor, anyway? Jack glanced at the time: nearly an hour had passed since he'd gone to check on Rose. Figures, Jack thought, he dragged me all the way back here for this desperately urgent mission that just couldn't wait until tomorrow, and now he's gone off to bed. He jabbed at the keyboard, bringing up pictures of the ship's labyrinthine interior on the screen. At first he saw only the hallways and common areas, but with a few minutes' prodding the monitor yielded up images of the living quarters as well. "Thank you very much, darling," Jack purred to the TARDIS, pulling up the Doctor's bedroom on the screen. No sign of him. He tried Rose's room.
"There you are ... oh. Oh."
The Doctor's back was towards him. He sat on the edge of Rose's bed, in the black jumper and dark trousers he'd worn earlier that night. The floor was littered with clothes, the Doctor's leather jacket and the elaborate bits and ruffles of Rose's blue silk opera dress scattered about. As the Doctor leaned forward, Rose suddenly came into view, and Jack unconsciously caught his breath at the sight of her: head thrown back, eyes closed, the dim lamplight in the room dripping golden shadows down her neck and across the fullness of her breasts as they spilled from the top of her silver-grey corset. She bit down on her lower lip, one hand clutching the pillow beside her head as the other snaked up, grabbed at the Doctor's shoulder, caught the back of his neck and pulled him to her.
Jack leaned closer to the screen, feeling his cock stir in appreciation at the scene, and lost himself in the sight of Rose's face. Her eyes were wide open as soundlessly on the screen she cried Yes, Doctor, yes, please! Jack's hand went to his cock, hard now and throbbing as he bucked with her, eyes locked on hers, on the broad curve of the Doctor's shoulders as he leaned across her. Her face as she came was as beautiful as he'd imagined it would be, the look in her warm brown eyes fierce and almost feline, and he was close himself, so close, as Rose closed her eyes, head back on the pillow, panting, and the Doctor on the screen turned to look over his shoulder with a fierce grin and met Jack's eyes.
Jack growled, grinned back as, looking into the Doctor's grey eyes, he came.
***
The control room was empty.
Which was not what he'd expected.
Once Rose had fallen asleep - almost before he could get her corset off and the blankets up to cover her - the Doctor had walked the corridors of the ship (slowly, but not too slowly) to the control room where Jack was waiting for him.
Should have been waiting for him.
He checked the Captain's bedroom, finding it empty and dark, and asked the TARDIS where he had got to. All the ship could tell him was that Jack had left, slipped out, and that whatever he had pulled up on the sensor logs before he left was gone with him, wiped away. Clever bastard, the Doctor thought darkly as he paced back to the control room. I must remember not to leave him alone with my ship; who knows what he'll have her doing next.
In the green glow of the time rotor, the Doctor sat down to wait for Jack.
***
The rain had stopped and the streets of Montmartre were crowded again. From a darkened doorway in a narrow allée a figure emerged, its nondescript overcoat somehow ill-fitting, a tall hat pulled low to throw a shadow across a face that seemed to glow bluish in the dim light of the street. It glanced furtively about and hastily pulled a pair of gloves over its scaly, three-fingered hands.
"This is over tomorrow," it whispered into the doorway.
"I know."
"No excuses." It glanced about again and strode off, trying unsuccessfully to keep the tip of its tail from dragging through puddles as it walked. A moment later Jack stepped out from the shadowed doorway and watched the figure disappear down the street. He sighed, ran a hand through his hair, and set off in the opposite direction.
***
"Bit adolescent, don't you think?" the Doctor asked. "Sneaking in past curfew." Jack shut the door and turned to face him. "Aren't you meant to be in stocking feet? Shoes in your hand, knocking over the milk bottles, tripping over the cat - "
"We don't have a cat." Jack stalked tiredly up the ramp into the control room. "And I don't have a curfew."
"Pity. That means I can't punish you."
The Captain's eyebrow twitched up briefly and the Doctor caught a momentary glint of utter wickedness in his eye, before Jack shook his head exhaustedly and leaned, arms crossed, against the console. "What are you doing up?"
"Where were you?"
"I asked first."
"We are being adolescent."
Jack sighed. "No," he said, pushing away from the console, "we're not. You are being infuriating; and I am going to bed."
The Doctor caught his arm as he passed. "I asked where you were," he said evenly.
"Out," Jack growled, jaw clenched. "Let go."
"Out where?"
Jack looked away, trying to pull his arm from the Doctor's grip. "There was ... something I had to take care of. Let go," he hissed as the Doctor wrenched his arm up, pulling him close. In the spare light from the console the Time Lord's eyes were icy and more alien than they had ever seemed. His voice was low and dangerously calm.
"All right. I might not know where you went. But I do know you wiped the sensors first, and I know that you can get the TARDIS to let you in where you have no business being - "
"That didn't seem to bother you a few hours ago."
"Shut it. You do what you like, but you leave my ship alone. Or I'll put you off it." Jack glared at him wordlessly. The Doctor let go of his arm and strode out of the room. "I mean it," he called over his shoulder. "You're not so beautiful I can't do without you."
***
Rose was sipping a cup of tea when Jack stalked into the kitchen the next morning. "Hiya," she chirped. Jack grunted hello and poured himself a coffee.
"Have a good night?"
"Lovely," he muttered.
"Meet any nice ... people?" she asked with such a sweetly wicked smile that Jack couldn't help but grin back.
"As a matter of fact, I did meet one delightful young man." Rose leaned eagerly across the table. "We had a few drinks, danced way too close ... " She bit her lower lip and nodded encouragingly, eyes shining. "And nothing happened," he finished.
Her face fell. "Nothing? Nothing at all?"
"Nope." Jack sipped his coffee. "Doctor Killjoy dragged me home to perform a lengthy and ultimately pointless sensor check. It was nothing," he added, noting her look of concern. "Probably just a glitch. How was the opera?"
Rose shrugged. "Honestly, I don't remember much of it. I had a little too much champagne."
"And came back and passed right out, I heard. Oh well - I guess everyone had a lonely night ... " Jack watched a truly beautiful blush creep up her cheeks. She smiled slyly and opened her mouth to speak when the Doctor stepped into the room.
"Morning, Rose Tyler. Sleep well?" She nodded, blushing brighter, and took a sip of tea. Jack laughed; the Doctor cut him off with a glance.
"Captain."
"Doctor," Jack muttered, glaring into his coffee mug. Rose looked from one man to the other.
"Um," she said into the sudden silence. "So. Who wants to go sightseeing? I hear they just finished this thing, what's it called? The Something Tower. Don't know if it's gonna last or anything, but it sounds all shiny and monumenty." She winked at Jack. "Probably worth checking out, d'you reckon?"
The Doctor reached for a banana from the bowl on the table. "Haven't been there in ages," he mused. "All right, the Eiffel Tower it is." He pocketed the banana and took Rose's hand. "Coming along, Captain?" Jack shook his head and swallowed the last of his coffee. He stood.
"Can't. Sorry, Rose," he said at her pout, "but I have an appointment to keep. Don't worry, Doctor, I'll be out of the ship all day. Have fun, you two. And don't fall off the Tower." He pecked Rose on the cheek and swept out of the room, the Doctor frowning thoughtfully after him.
Rose giggled.
"Well. Looks like something's gonna happen with his delightful young man after all. C'mon, Doctor. Can we stop for a croissant on the way?"
***
"Anything?"
The Doctor shook his head. Rose sighed.
"How long's he been gone for?"
"About thirty hours."
"And don't you think it's time we went looking for him?"
"He's a big boy, Rose, I'm sure he can take care of - "
"Look," Rose said, rounding on him, "I've no idea why the two of you are pissed off at each other, and frankly I don't care. Jack's gone missing. It's been more than a day, now it's time to get on the bloody sensor thingy or whatever toys this ship has and find him. If it'd been you gone, he'd be the first out looking for you, so you get on with it. Now."
With the slightest smile, the Doctor turned to the console.
***
It was a big knife.
No, the Doctor thought, it was a big knife: heavy and ornate, with a handle covered in dark blue stones and a fiercely sharp, curved blade fashioned from some dully gleaming green metal.
A big, sharp blade. Held by a hand with big, sharp claws, and poised over Jack like a fork over a plate of chips.
Rose skidded into the doorway behind the Doctor and stopped short at the sight of Jack stripped naked, strapped hand and foot to the cast-iron bedframe and surrounded by what looked to be half a dozen six-foot-tall blue lizards. One of whom was pointing a knife at his chest.
A big knife.
"Jack!" she breathed, stepping towards him. The Doctor put out an arm to stop her.
"Shhh!" he whispered. "They're Risapheans. It's some sort of ritual."
"What ritual?" Rose whispered back urgently.
"Dunno. Everything's rituals with them - there's even a ritual-interrupting ritual. Seriously!" he insisted, as she glared sceptically at him.
"Well, do you know it?"
The Doctor smiled widely and - he hoped - encouragingly. "Nope. But I can fake it." He stepped into the room, arms folded, and bowed twice before the nearest lizard. "As the many suns of Risaphea circle the green seas, so do I offer you greetings - "
"Oh, gods," the lizard huffed, rolling it's orange, slit-pupilled eyes extravagantly. "Mornak, hang on," it called to the one with the knife. "More Humans. Who can't tell the difference between Risapheans and Ranaphonx, I might add - they must be with Jack." Mornak lowered the knife, tail swishing in aggravation, and looked from the Doctor to Jack.
"Did you seriously invite friends? Or are these your new wives?" it asked snarkily. Jack lifted his head with difficulty and peered towards the doorway.
"Whozat?" he asked thickly. "Doctor? Rose - don't remember inviting you ... " He trailed off and his head fell heavily against the bed. Pushing past the Doctor, Rose ran to his side.
"Jack! Hold on! We'll get you out of this!" She began pulling at the leathery bands securing him to the bed. Mornak and the others stared at her, open-mouthed.
"Rose," the Doctor said quietly.
"What'd they do to him? He's passed out!"
"Rose."
"Don't just stand there! Help me get him free!"
"Rose." The Doctor put a hand on her shoulder and steered her gently away from the bed. She looked about, panic in her eyes, and the Doctor lowered his voice. "I may have made a slight error. Or two."
"Error?"
"Yes. Now, in my defence," he looked over his shoulder towards the lizard-creature in the doorway, "Ranaphonx do look quite a bit like Risapheans. Superficially, anyway - "
"Oh, save it! You're as speciesist as the rest of this galaxy. We all look alike to you Humans, don't we? I bet you can't even tell Pyleans from Manaconites - "
"Hey! You'll watch who you're calling a Human! I'm Gallifreyan, I'll have you know. Who's speciesist now?"
"Doctor!" Rose interrupted. "Will you tell me what's going on? Why do these Ranafunkians want to sacrifice Jack?"
"Sacrifice?" The room erupted in outraged chatter. The Doctor put up a hand to quiet them.
"Now, no, now - wait! It's just a misunderstanding, that's all. Er, Rose, it's not so much a sacrifice as a, well ... "
"Birthing chamber," Mornak supplied. Rose whirled about and gaped. "And the anaesthesia isn't going to last long. We can do this with Jack awake, I don't care - personally, I wouldn't mind causing the bastard a little extra pain - but I don't think he's going to like it much."
"No. Of course not. We'll just wait outside, shall we?" The Doctor led an open-mouthed Rose to the door, paused, and turned back. "Oh, and of course felicitations are in order." He looked from one Ranaphonx to another. "Who's the mother, then?"
Five of the lizard-creatures raised a hand. The Doctor bowed politely. "Excellent. Congratulations. We'll be in the hall."
***
"But it's your child, Jack - out there, somewhere. Don't you care about it at all?"
"Them."
"What?"
"Not it. Them. It was a clutch of eggs. There were hundreds. I was just the host."
Rose turned slightly green. She swallowed and tried to smile comfortingly at him. "Oh. Well then. You just ... rest, and try to - to feel better, and ... I'm sorry, Jack!" She bolted suddenly from the room, a hand over her mouth.
"I'm sure I can get partial custody, though! Maybe on week-ends?" he called after her, laughing.
The Doctor put his head round the door. "Told her about the eggs, did you?"
"Yup. Remind me to make her a nice big omelette as soon as I'm on my feet again."
"That's cruel, that is." He smiled and sat on the edge of Jack's bed. "You look good for a bloke that's just had twelve dozen kids. How'd you feel, then?"
"Bit sore - I could use a handful of nanogenes right about now. They did an okay job on the incision, though."
"Can I see it?"
Jack shrugged. "You're the doctor." He pushed the blankets aside and lifted his t-shirt.
"You heal quickly."
"Always have." The Doctor traced a cool finger down the line of stitches across his belly and gazed quietly at him. "Something wrong?" Jack asked.
The Doctor regarded him. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked softly.
"Tell you what? That I was pissed drunk on Rana and got myself knocked up by a pack of bitchy lizards? It's not exactly my proudest moment."
"I thought you ... I get very protective of my ship, Jack."
"I wouldn't hurt this ship. Or you. You should know that."
The Doctor nodded and murmured "I know."
"Well then."
"Yeah." They sat in silence for a few moments, Jack enjoying immensely the look of indecision on the Doctor's face.
"Doctor?" he said, finally.
"Hmm?"
"You should kiss me now."
"Oh, Jack." Sighing, the Doctor shook his head and drew Jack's t-shirt down again, smoothing it gently across his stomach. His expression was so neutral that for a moment Jack was flustered, wondering if he'd misjudged things all along. It wasn't until that gentle hand crept downwards and settled deliberately against his cock that Jack caught the wicked gleam in his grey eyes, and grinned as the Doctor leaned close to whisper in his ear.
"I should do a lot more than that."
Author: reina_isabella
Gift for: Scap3goat
Rating: 15 / pg-13
Pairing: Nine/Rose, Nine/Jack (implied)
Word count: 4087
Summary: Jack is keeping secrets.
Spoilers: Nothing beyond the obvious.
Author's Notes: Written for the twdw_ficathon as a gift for Scap3goat, who requested: a secret Jack Harkness harbours (bonus for Jack's pregnancy), some kind of voyeurism, and the clicking noise of a keyboard. (One of 3 totally unconnected fics that came from that, actually.) Set between "The Doctor Dances" and "The Parting of the Ways," and beta'd by the shining ray of light and grammar that is Kimchi the betagoddess.
PARIS
"Vous cherchez quelqu'un en particulier, Monsieur? Ou simplement quelqu'un?"
"Hmm? Oh - heh, thanks love," the Doctor smiled at her, "but I am looking for someone in particular, yes." The woman blinked prettily at him and made a moue.
"C'est dommage, Monsieur." She - or was it he? Between the rouge and the wig and the dim gaslight of the café the Doctor couldn't tell for certain - ran a gloved finger down his jaw. "Alors, à bientôt, peut-être?" she purred, and sashayed away. The Doctor watched the slim figure disappear into the crowd and smoke of the small, hot room and thought, If Jack is in here, I'm going to have a hell of a time getting him to leave.
People pressed against him from all sides and in the flickering orange light and shifting cigarette haze the rose-pink walls seemed to throb with a pulse of their own. A crowd of young men in shirtsleeves argued loudly at a table nearby, snatches of Latin and Greek thrown into the shouted French as they thumped the tabletop and swore at one another. A tightly-corseted girl danced by, her bosom rouged and her eyes glassy, in the arms of a woman in a slim and immaculate dark suit. The Doctor stepped aside as a man in red satin pants stumbled past, the gas flames reflecting off the sheen of sweat on his bare chest and back, and collapsed across the brocaded lap of an enormous woman holding court from a low divan. The woman roared with laughter and swatted the man's red-satin behind. A hell of a time, indeed, the Doctor thought, and moved off through the crowd.
He finally caught sight of him in a far corner - a half-empty bottle of green liquid at his elbow, an almost-full glass in his hand, and a young soldier leaning across the table to sip the liquor from his lips. "Jack!" the Doctor called. Jack looked up, focusing his eyes with difficulty. A catlike grin spread across his face as the Doctor crossed the room towards him. Jack raised his glass in greeting.
"Doctor," he purred, "care for some absinthe? We only have one glass, but we seem to have figured out a way around that. This is Jules." The young soldier glared jealously at the Doctor and tightened his grip on Jack's thigh.
"Enchanté," he muttered.
"Yeah, hi to you, too," the Doctor nodded, and turned back to Jack. "We need to go."
"We've only just gotten here."
"Right. And so has something else. Back to the TARDIS, now. I need your help."
Jack sighed and handed the glass to the soldier. "Sorry, kid. I have to go." The young man glanced at the Doctor and bent to whisper in Jack's ear. Jack groaned and looked over pleadingly. "Can't I have an hour?" he asked. "Half an hour?"
Arms folded, the Doctor glared at him. "Now."
"Six minutes in the alley out back?" he muttered.
"Now."
Jack glared back momentarily, grabbed Jules roughly by the back of the neck and kissed him savagely. "All right. Ready?" he asked, standing and pulling on his coat. The Doctor looked quickly away.
"'Course."
"Let's go, then." Jack grabbed the bottle from the table and winked at Jules. " 'Night."
"Au revoir, Capitaine."
"I sincerely hope so," Jack called over his shoulder as he led the way out of the café.
Outside rain hissed on the pavement and the lights from the windows made shifting patterns on the wet ground. Jack paused to turn up the collar of his coat and waited for the Doctor to push through the crowd taking shelter under the striped awning of the café. "Okay," he said as they set off down the dark street. "Tell me. What's the big bad this time? And where's Rose?"
"In the TARDIS," the Doctor told him. "Sleeping off five glasses of champagne. Honestly, the two of you," he complained, eyeing the bottle in Jack's hand, "it's like living with a pair of Colufroxes."
"What's a - no, never mind," Jack said. "Just tell me what we're up against."
The Doctor glanced at Jack out of the corner of his eye. His dark hair was inky in the rain, his blue eyes shining like the wet pavement. "Dunno, exactly," the Doctor said. "But whatever it is, it followed us here from Sarstak Five. I think - "
"Wait a minute." Jack halted and turned to him. "You're not talking about our shadow, are you? That little blip on the sensors that hasn't done a damn bit of harm or damage - that hasn't actually done anything other than follow us around on our last few trips? Is that what you're talking about?"
"Yup."
"I don't believe you!" Jack stomped off a few paces and turned to face the Doctor from the flickering pool of light beneath a street lamp. He pointed back in the direction of the café. "That boy just got back from six months' duty in Morocco! Do you have any idea of the kinds of things a boy like that can learn to do in Morocco in six months? You don't think this could have waited until tomorrow? Or at least for an hour?" He kicked the iron post of the street lamp in frustration and a dull clang echoed through the nearly-empty street. "I bet you made Rose leave the opera early for this, too, didn't you?"
"Not at all."
"I bet you did," Jack grumbled, striding off down the street once more. As the Doctor caught up with him at the end of the block Jack muttered, "Just because you're in a mood doesn't mean that the humans can't have a night off once in a while. You didn't have to drag me away from - from that café," he insisted, noting the Doctor's wry glance, "and you know very well all Rose has talked about for ages is going to the opera in Paris."
"I did not make Rose leave the opera, I had to carry her out after the second act and put her to bed. Which is when I noticed that we've been followed again; which I happen to think - " Jack opened his mouth to interrupt " - which I happen to think is worth looking into. Immediately. And since I am the one in charge, we're looking into it. Immediately." They reached the end of the cobbled alley where the TARDIS waited, wet and shining in the rain. Jack paused, his hand on the door, and glared at the Doctor.
"Is there a word in Gallifreyan for 'wet blanket'?" he asked, eyes blazing. "Or 'stick in the mud'?" He shoved open the door and stepped into the ship. "How about just 'No fucking fun at all'?"
The Doctor passed him expressionlessly, heading for the corridor, and called over his shoulder. "Get started. Internal sensors. It's here's somewhere."
"And where the hell are you going?"
"Check on Rose. Get to work."
Jack slammed down into a chair. "Yes, Doctor," he grumbled in exasperation after the retreating figure, shrugging out of his coat and turning to the console of the TARDIS. Well; it was small consolation, he reflected, but at least he had the chance to get his hands on the ship for a few minutes - next to the Time Lord himself, it was the most maddeningly alluring thing Jack had ever met, and being alone with it was almost as enticing as being alone with the Doctor.
"More so," Jack muttered, running a finger along the console. "He's in a hell of a mood." The ship seemed to hum in response and Jack asked, half expecting the TARDIS to answer, "What's his problem, anyway?" Unsurprisingly, the ship made no reply; shaking his head, he adjusted a monitor screen in front of him and got to work.
For a long time the only sounds in the control room were the gentle thrum of the ship and the clicking of the keyboard under his fingers as he searched through sensor data for their silent stalker. Brief shadows appeared here and there - the smallest spike on the instruments, a blip, a murmur. Something nudged at Jack from the back of his mind ... familiar, somehow, but what? ... why not just tell the Doctor, let the one in charge figure it out -
Where was the Doctor, anyway? Jack glanced at the time: nearly an hour had passed since he'd gone to check on Rose. Figures, Jack thought, he dragged me all the way back here for this desperately urgent mission that just couldn't wait until tomorrow, and now he's gone off to bed. He jabbed at the keyboard, bringing up pictures of the ship's labyrinthine interior on the screen. At first he saw only the hallways and common areas, but with a few minutes' prodding the monitor yielded up images of the living quarters as well. "Thank you very much, darling," Jack purred to the TARDIS, pulling up the Doctor's bedroom on the screen. No sign of him. He tried Rose's room.
"There you are ... oh. Oh."
The Doctor's back was towards him. He sat on the edge of Rose's bed, in the black jumper and dark trousers he'd worn earlier that night. The floor was littered with clothes, the Doctor's leather jacket and the elaborate bits and ruffles of Rose's blue silk opera dress scattered about. As the Doctor leaned forward, Rose suddenly came into view, and Jack unconsciously caught his breath at the sight of her: head thrown back, eyes closed, the dim lamplight in the room dripping golden shadows down her neck and across the fullness of her breasts as they spilled from the top of her silver-grey corset. She bit down on her lower lip, one hand clutching the pillow beside her head as the other snaked up, grabbed at the Doctor's shoulder, caught the back of his neck and pulled him to her.
Jack leaned closer to the screen, feeling his cock stir in appreciation at the scene, and lost himself in the sight of Rose's face. Her eyes were wide open as soundlessly on the screen she cried Yes, Doctor, yes, please! Jack's hand went to his cock, hard now and throbbing as he bucked with her, eyes locked on hers, on the broad curve of the Doctor's shoulders as he leaned across her. Her face as she came was as beautiful as he'd imagined it would be, the look in her warm brown eyes fierce and almost feline, and he was close himself, so close, as Rose closed her eyes, head back on the pillow, panting, and the Doctor on the screen turned to look over his shoulder with a fierce grin and met Jack's eyes.
Jack growled, grinned back as, looking into the Doctor's grey eyes, he came.
***
The control room was empty.
Which was not what he'd expected.
Once Rose had fallen asleep - almost before he could get her corset off and the blankets up to cover her - the Doctor had walked the corridors of the ship (slowly, but not too slowly) to the control room where Jack was waiting for him.
Should have been waiting for him.
He checked the Captain's bedroom, finding it empty and dark, and asked the TARDIS where he had got to. All the ship could tell him was that Jack had left, slipped out, and that whatever he had pulled up on the sensor logs before he left was gone with him, wiped away. Clever bastard, the Doctor thought darkly as he paced back to the control room. I must remember not to leave him alone with my ship; who knows what he'll have her doing next.
In the green glow of the time rotor, the Doctor sat down to wait for Jack.
***
The rain had stopped and the streets of Montmartre were crowded again. From a darkened doorway in a narrow allée a figure emerged, its nondescript overcoat somehow ill-fitting, a tall hat pulled low to throw a shadow across a face that seemed to glow bluish in the dim light of the street. It glanced furtively about and hastily pulled a pair of gloves over its scaly, three-fingered hands.
"This is over tomorrow," it whispered into the doorway.
"I know."
"No excuses." It glanced about again and strode off, trying unsuccessfully to keep the tip of its tail from dragging through puddles as it walked. A moment later Jack stepped out from the shadowed doorway and watched the figure disappear down the street. He sighed, ran a hand through his hair, and set off in the opposite direction.
***
"Bit adolescent, don't you think?" the Doctor asked. "Sneaking in past curfew." Jack shut the door and turned to face him. "Aren't you meant to be in stocking feet? Shoes in your hand, knocking over the milk bottles, tripping over the cat - "
"We don't have a cat." Jack stalked tiredly up the ramp into the control room. "And I don't have a curfew."
"Pity. That means I can't punish you."
The Captain's eyebrow twitched up briefly and the Doctor caught a momentary glint of utter wickedness in his eye, before Jack shook his head exhaustedly and leaned, arms crossed, against the console. "What are you doing up?"
"Where were you?"
"I asked first."
"We are being adolescent."
Jack sighed. "No," he said, pushing away from the console, "we're not. You are being infuriating; and I am going to bed."
The Doctor caught his arm as he passed. "I asked where you were," he said evenly.
"Out," Jack growled, jaw clenched. "Let go."
"Out where?"
Jack looked away, trying to pull his arm from the Doctor's grip. "There was ... something I had to take care of. Let go," he hissed as the Doctor wrenched his arm up, pulling him close. In the spare light from the console the Time Lord's eyes were icy and more alien than they had ever seemed. His voice was low and dangerously calm.
"All right. I might not know where you went. But I do know you wiped the sensors first, and I know that you can get the TARDIS to let you in where you have no business being - "
"That didn't seem to bother you a few hours ago."
"Shut it. You do what you like, but you leave my ship alone. Or I'll put you off it." Jack glared at him wordlessly. The Doctor let go of his arm and strode out of the room. "I mean it," he called over his shoulder. "You're not so beautiful I can't do without you."
***
Rose was sipping a cup of tea when Jack stalked into the kitchen the next morning. "Hiya," she chirped. Jack grunted hello and poured himself a coffee.
"Have a good night?"
"Lovely," he muttered.
"Meet any nice ... people?" she asked with such a sweetly wicked smile that Jack couldn't help but grin back.
"As a matter of fact, I did meet one delightful young man." Rose leaned eagerly across the table. "We had a few drinks, danced way too close ... " She bit her lower lip and nodded encouragingly, eyes shining. "And nothing happened," he finished.
Her face fell. "Nothing? Nothing at all?"
"Nope." Jack sipped his coffee. "Doctor Killjoy dragged me home to perform a lengthy and ultimately pointless sensor check. It was nothing," he added, noting her look of concern. "Probably just a glitch. How was the opera?"
Rose shrugged. "Honestly, I don't remember much of it. I had a little too much champagne."
"And came back and passed right out, I heard. Oh well - I guess everyone had a lonely night ... " Jack watched a truly beautiful blush creep up her cheeks. She smiled slyly and opened her mouth to speak when the Doctor stepped into the room.
"Morning, Rose Tyler. Sleep well?" She nodded, blushing brighter, and took a sip of tea. Jack laughed; the Doctor cut him off with a glance.
"Captain."
"Doctor," Jack muttered, glaring into his coffee mug. Rose looked from one man to the other.
"Um," she said into the sudden silence. "So. Who wants to go sightseeing? I hear they just finished this thing, what's it called? The Something Tower. Don't know if it's gonna last or anything, but it sounds all shiny and monumenty." She winked at Jack. "Probably worth checking out, d'you reckon?"
The Doctor reached for a banana from the bowl on the table. "Haven't been there in ages," he mused. "All right, the Eiffel Tower it is." He pocketed the banana and took Rose's hand. "Coming along, Captain?" Jack shook his head and swallowed the last of his coffee. He stood.
"Can't. Sorry, Rose," he said at her pout, "but I have an appointment to keep. Don't worry, Doctor, I'll be out of the ship all day. Have fun, you two. And don't fall off the Tower." He pecked Rose on the cheek and swept out of the room, the Doctor frowning thoughtfully after him.
Rose giggled.
"Well. Looks like something's gonna happen with his delightful young man after all. C'mon, Doctor. Can we stop for a croissant on the way?"
***
"Anything?"
The Doctor shook his head. Rose sighed.
"How long's he been gone for?"
"About thirty hours."
"And don't you think it's time we went looking for him?"
"He's a big boy, Rose, I'm sure he can take care of - "
"Look," Rose said, rounding on him, "I've no idea why the two of you are pissed off at each other, and frankly I don't care. Jack's gone missing. It's been more than a day, now it's time to get on the bloody sensor thingy or whatever toys this ship has and find him. If it'd been you gone, he'd be the first out looking for you, so you get on with it. Now."
With the slightest smile, the Doctor turned to the console.
***
It was a big knife.
No, the Doctor thought, it was a big knife: heavy and ornate, with a handle covered in dark blue stones and a fiercely sharp, curved blade fashioned from some dully gleaming green metal.
A big, sharp blade. Held by a hand with big, sharp claws, and poised over Jack like a fork over a plate of chips.
Rose skidded into the doorway behind the Doctor and stopped short at the sight of Jack stripped naked, strapped hand and foot to the cast-iron bedframe and surrounded by what looked to be half a dozen six-foot-tall blue lizards. One of whom was pointing a knife at his chest.
A big knife.
"Jack!" she breathed, stepping towards him. The Doctor put out an arm to stop her.
"Shhh!" he whispered. "They're Risapheans. It's some sort of ritual."
"What ritual?" Rose whispered back urgently.
"Dunno. Everything's rituals with them - there's even a ritual-interrupting ritual. Seriously!" he insisted, as she glared sceptically at him.
"Well, do you know it?"
The Doctor smiled widely and - he hoped - encouragingly. "Nope. But I can fake it." He stepped into the room, arms folded, and bowed twice before the nearest lizard. "As the many suns of Risaphea circle the green seas, so do I offer you greetings - "
"Oh, gods," the lizard huffed, rolling it's orange, slit-pupilled eyes extravagantly. "Mornak, hang on," it called to the one with the knife. "More Humans. Who can't tell the difference between Risapheans and Ranaphonx, I might add - they must be with Jack." Mornak lowered the knife, tail swishing in aggravation, and looked from the Doctor to Jack.
"Did you seriously invite friends? Or are these your new wives?" it asked snarkily. Jack lifted his head with difficulty and peered towards the doorway.
"Whozat?" he asked thickly. "Doctor? Rose - don't remember inviting you ... " He trailed off and his head fell heavily against the bed. Pushing past the Doctor, Rose ran to his side.
"Jack! Hold on! We'll get you out of this!" She began pulling at the leathery bands securing him to the bed. Mornak and the others stared at her, open-mouthed.
"Rose," the Doctor said quietly.
"What'd they do to him? He's passed out!"
"Rose."
"Don't just stand there! Help me get him free!"
"Rose." The Doctor put a hand on her shoulder and steered her gently away from the bed. She looked about, panic in her eyes, and the Doctor lowered his voice. "I may have made a slight error. Or two."
"Error?"
"Yes. Now, in my defence," he looked over his shoulder towards the lizard-creature in the doorway, "Ranaphonx do look quite a bit like Risapheans. Superficially, anyway - "
"Oh, save it! You're as speciesist as the rest of this galaxy. We all look alike to you Humans, don't we? I bet you can't even tell Pyleans from Manaconites - "
"Hey! You'll watch who you're calling a Human! I'm Gallifreyan, I'll have you know. Who's speciesist now?"
"Doctor!" Rose interrupted. "Will you tell me what's going on? Why do these Ranafunkians want to sacrifice Jack?"
"Sacrifice?" The room erupted in outraged chatter. The Doctor put up a hand to quiet them.
"Now, no, now - wait! It's just a misunderstanding, that's all. Er, Rose, it's not so much a sacrifice as a, well ... "
"Birthing chamber," Mornak supplied. Rose whirled about and gaped. "And the anaesthesia isn't going to last long. We can do this with Jack awake, I don't care - personally, I wouldn't mind causing the bastard a little extra pain - but I don't think he's going to like it much."
"No. Of course not. We'll just wait outside, shall we?" The Doctor led an open-mouthed Rose to the door, paused, and turned back. "Oh, and of course felicitations are in order." He looked from one Ranaphonx to another. "Who's the mother, then?"
Five of the lizard-creatures raised a hand. The Doctor bowed politely. "Excellent. Congratulations. We'll be in the hall."
***
"But it's your child, Jack - out there, somewhere. Don't you care about it at all?"
"Them."
"What?"
"Not it. Them. It was a clutch of eggs. There were hundreds. I was just the host."
Rose turned slightly green. She swallowed and tried to smile comfortingly at him. "Oh. Well then. You just ... rest, and try to - to feel better, and ... I'm sorry, Jack!" She bolted suddenly from the room, a hand over her mouth.
"I'm sure I can get partial custody, though! Maybe on week-ends?" he called after her, laughing.
The Doctor put his head round the door. "Told her about the eggs, did you?"
"Yup. Remind me to make her a nice big omelette as soon as I'm on my feet again."
"That's cruel, that is." He smiled and sat on the edge of Jack's bed. "You look good for a bloke that's just had twelve dozen kids. How'd you feel, then?"
"Bit sore - I could use a handful of nanogenes right about now. They did an okay job on the incision, though."
"Can I see it?"
Jack shrugged. "You're the doctor." He pushed the blankets aside and lifted his t-shirt.
"You heal quickly."
"Always have." The Doctor traced a cool finger down the line of stitches across his belly and gazed quietly at him. "Something wrong?" Jack asked.
The Doctor regarded him. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked softly.
"Tell you what? That I was pissed drunk on Rana and got myself knocked up by a pack of bitchy lizards? It's not exactly my proudest moment."
"I thought you ... I get very protective of my ship, Jack."
"I wouldn't hurt this ship. Or you. You should know that."
The Doctor nodded and murmured "I know."
"Well then."
"Yeah." They sat in silence for a few moments, Jack enjoying immensely the look of indecision on the Doctor's face.
"Doctor?" he said, finally.
"Hmm?"
"You should kiss me now."
"Oh, Jack." Sighing, the Doctor shook his head and drew Jack's t-shirt down again, smoothing it gently across his stomach. His expression was so neutral that for a moment Jack was flustered, wondering if he'd misjudged things all along. It wasn't until that gentle hand crept downwards and settled deliberately against his cock that Jack caught the wicked gleam in his grey eyes, and grinned as the Doctor leaned close to whisper in his ear.
"I should do a lot more than that."