if i had just one tear rolling down your cheek
make it go away. make this heartache that i feel so deeply go away. i can't stand it anymore. i feel like my heart is going to burst. god i hate this. i hate not being able to live my life around all of the people that i love in this world. i feel so lost in rock island it's ridiculous. i don't fucking belong here. somebody bail me out of this prison. i feel like i'm being punished or something. besides my family and kala, and partially my job, i could give a fuck less if i ever saw this place again. honestly.
i'm so exhausted. double shifts at the apple hut suck my ass. i need a back rub. make that a full body massage. on the fly. and make these tears go away, too. i don't want them either. my face is burning up from the thousands of tears running down my cheeks.
i know. ten more months. i just need to stay focused. wednesday was one of the shittiest days of my entire existence. i did not want to say goodbye...to any of you. but that's life, right? i can't wait for june to come so i can say adios. i feel like i'm missing out on so much. even just the little things. hanging out with you guys watching movies or whatever means more to me than anything i do here with anyone. it shouldn't have to be like that. this summer has completely made me realize how much i want to come back. to be surrounded by people who make me laugh harder than i can stand. i love to laugh. and i feel like i never laugh here. granted that life would not be perfect there. life is never perfect anywhere. but at least i would have a sense of peace...with everything. that's all i want.
okay. i think i'm done feeling sorry for myself now. i love you all.
i'm so exhausted. double shifts at the apple hut suck my ass. i need a back rub. make that a full body massage. on the fly. and make these tears go away, too. i don't want them either. my face is burning up from the thousands of tears running down my cheeks.
i know. ten more months. i just need to stay focused. wednesday was one of the shittiest days of my entire existence. i did not want to say goodbye...to any of you. but that's life, right? i can't wait for june to come so i can say adios. i feel like i'm missing out on so much. even just the little things. hanging out with you guys watching movies or whatever means more to me than anything i do here with anyone. it shouldn't have to be like that. this summer has completely made me realize how much i want to come back. to be surrounded by people who make me laugh harder than i can stand. i love to laugh. and i feel like i never laugh here. granted that life would not be perfect there. life is never perfect anywhere. but at least i would have a sense of peace...with everything. that's all i want.
okay. i think i'm done feeling sorry for myself now. i love you all.