Come into my Night Garden...
As regular readers will know, I am famed for my firm stance against the corruption of this nation's youth by the debauched medium of television. It therefore falls to me to announce a shocking piece of showbiz news.
Due to widespread overexposure to non-organic rice cakes, the children of Britain have terrifying short attention spans and are constantly clamouring for the Next Big Thing. Sure, Rastamouse may be grabbing all the attention at the moment, but unscrupulous TV producers are so hungry for ratings that they're desperate to retool other kids' TV shows to make them appeal to a much wider and more devoted demographic.
I can now reveal that the first show to be selected for souped-up sequelization is that cosy bedtime favourite In The Night Garden and here's an EXCLUSIVE first glimpse at the sexy, pouty, angst-ridden results:
A few sceptics have suggested that the show's content is still too tame to support a truly batshit committed fandom, but given that existing In the Night Garden episode titles genuinely include such gems as Upsy Daisy Kisses Everything, Igglepiggle Looks For Upsy Daisy and Follows Her Bed and Tombliboo Ooo Drinks Everybody Else's Pinky Ponk Juice, it seems that there is no shortage of material for over-imaginative fanficcers to work with...
Due to widespread overexposure to non-organic rice cakes, the children of Britain have terrifying short attention spans and are constantly clamouring for the Next Big Thing. Sure, Rastamouse may be grabbing all the attention at the moment, but unscrupulous TV producers are so hungry for ratings that they're desperate to retool other kids' TV shows to make them appeal to a much wider and more devoted demographic.
I can now reveal that the first show to be selected for souped-up sequelization is that cosy bedtime favourite In The Night Garden and here's an EXCLUSIVE first glimpse at the sexy, pouty, angst-ridden results:
A few sceptics have suggested that the show's content is still too tame to support a truly batshit committed fandom, but given that existing In the Night Garden episode titles genuinely include such gems as Upsy Daisy Kisses Everything, Igglepiggle Looks For Upsy Daisy and Follows Her Bed and Tombliboo Ooo Drinks Everybody Else's Pinky Ponk Juice, it seems that there is no shortage of material for over-imaginative fanficcers to work with...