I bring you love
I feel like I've been reduced in surprising and hurtful ways this year. The rebirths, when they come, are bittersweet.
Today is my absolutely favorite type of Western New York fall day. While many trees are bare, many more still have gloriously colored leaves. Since the foliage is thinner, you can see the branches underneath, arching back to stretch up to the sky. It's a sunny day, and the light on the russet leaves outside my office window is casting shadows against the brick of the building. I want to climb out the window and just stare at the trees and the sky. I love summer and fall in WNY.
Now if I could only find a suitable place to live the other 7 months of the year.
Rick took me to Fort Erie yesterday for a laser eye surgery consultation. While the procedure freaks me out a little, I'm going to go for it. The prospect of being able to see without worrying about contacts is just too good to pass up. My eyes have gotten drier as I've gotten older and even the extended wear lenses bother me sometimes. According to the doc, I'm a perfect candidate -- not too blind, with nice thick corneas. They performed a dilated eye exam, which I'd never had done before. I sat down in the waiting room and told Rick that they said the dilation would take a few minutes and asked if had happened yet. He stared at me in horror and said, "Yes, stop looking at me!" Apparently, I looked like Mr. Burns.
I'm going to have a procedure called "monovision," during which they'll correct my left eye (my dominant eye) for distance, and under correct the right one so I can have close vision. If I don't like it, they re-correct my under corrected eye for no charge. The doctor who will be performing my laser surgery has monovision correction herself. I'm really kind of amazed at how far laser surgery has come over the years. My surgery will cost $1198 (U.S. -- the office is located in Canada). If I had needed a different procedure, it could have cost as much as $1598. I remember when it cost more than that per eye.
The weekend was OK, but weird. I don't know when I'm going to get used to Lola not being there. I picked her ashes up on Saturday. I thought I'd be ok, but started crying as soon as she handed me the paper bag. I think it was seeing "Lola" typed across the envelope that was paper clipped to the bag. The paw print was in there -- I didn't notice that "In Loving Memory" was carved into the back until Sunday night, which set off another spate of tears. The ashes are in a tin -- I'm going to see about getting a biodegradable container for them. Weird things bother me. The death certificate has "Lola" on it -- quotation marks and all. Why? Don't they consider that her real name? Is it because she was an animal? I just don't get that.
I'm back on track with eating and exercise again. I mean, I've got my willpower firmly in place and I actually got out of bed to exercise this morning. I am easing back in, since I pretty much gave up on all physical activity. I did a 10-minute "total body" routine this morning and I've got my workout clothes with me to hit the gym after work. Forty minutes a day for the rest of this week is a good start. The binging is over, the peanut butter gone. I'm not going to follow South Beach Phase 1 strictly, but I am cutting out all the crap that had crept in -- no more crackers, pretzels, candy (an occasional piece is ok), or commercial granola bars. I'm going to make a batch of granola tonight (or maybe in the morning -- warm granola, yogurt, and fresh fruit sounds delish) and increase my veggie intake again. I'm going to try to eat more protein. I'm off wine until Thanksgiving (hah -- a sacrifice -- Thanksgiving is next week!:). I'm going to drink more water. I just have to get back on track -- it would be very easily for the rest of the weight to pile back on, and quick. No thanks, I worked too hard for that.
Ending with one of my favorite pics -- it's good to have these kinds of memories:
Today is my absolutely favorite type of Western New York fall day. While many trees are bare, many more still have gloriously colored leaves. Since the foliage is thinner, you can see the branches underneath, arching back to stretch up to the sky. It's a sunny day, and the light on the russet leaves outside my office window is casting shadows against the brick of the building. I want to climb out the window and just stare at the trees and the sky. I love summer and fall in WNY.
Now if I could only find a suitable place to live the other 7 months of the year.
Rick took me to Fort Erie yesterday for a laser eye surgery consultation. While the procedure freaks me out a little, I'm going to go for it. The prospect of being able to see without worrying about contacts is just too good to pass up. My eyes have gotten drier as I've gotten older and even the extended wear lenses bother me sometimes. According to the doc, I'm a perfect candidate -- not too blind, with nice thick corneas. They performed a dilated eye exam, which I'd never had done before. I sat down in the waiting room and told Rick that they said the dilation would take a few minutes and asked if had happened yet. He stared at me in horror and said, "Yes, stop looking at me!" Apparently, I looked like Mr. Burns.
I'm going to have a procedure called "monovision," during which they'll correct my left eye (my dominant eye) for distance, and under correct the right one so I can have close vision. If I don't like it, they re-correct my under corrected eye for no charge. The doctor who will be performing my laser surgery has monovision correction herself. I'm really kind of amazed at how far laser surgery has come over the years. My surgery will cost $1198 (U.S. -- the office is located in Canada). If I had needed a different procedure, it could have cost as much as $1598. I remember when it cost more than that per eye.
The weekend was OK, but weird. I don't know when I'm going to get used to Lola not being there. I picked her ashes up on Saturday. I thought I'd be ok, but started crying as soon as she handed me the paper bag. I think it was seeing "Lola" typed across the envelope that was paper clipped to the bag. The paw print was in there -- I didn't notice that "In Loving Memory" was carved into the back until Sunday night, which set off another spate of tears. The ashes are in a tin -- I'm going to see about getting a biodegradable container for them. Weird things bother me. The death certificate has "Lola" on it -- quotation marks and all. Why? Don't they consider that her real name? Is it because she was an animal? I just don't get that.
I'm back on track with eating and exercise again. I mean, I've got my willpower firmly in place and I actually got out of bed to exercise this morning. I am easing back in, since I pretty much gave up on all physical activity. I did a 10-minute "total body" routine this morning and I've got my workout clothes with me to hit the gym after work. Forty minutes a day for the rest of this week is a good start. The binging is over, the peanut butter gone. I'm not going to follow South Beach Phase 1 strictly, but I am cutting out all the crap that had crept in -- no more crackers, pretzels, candy (an occasional piece is ok), or commercial granola bars. I'm going to make a batch of granola tonight (or maybe in the morning -- warm granola, yogurt, and fresh fruit sounds delish) and increase my veggie intake again. I'm going to try to eat more protein. I'm off wine until Thanksgiving (hah -- a sacrifice -- Thanksgiving is next week!:). I'm going to drink more water. I just have to get back on track -- it would be very easily for the rest of the weight to pile back on, and quick. No thanks, I worked too hard for that.
Ending with one of my favorite pics -- it's good to have these kinds of memories: