Criminal
Bitch, Moan: L1 and I were supposed to see KMFDM last night, but it was cancelled that morning. (Because all of Gatien's clubs were seized AGAIN. Didn't this get resolved 5 years ago?!) This combined with the same day cancelling of Pig in July after Vi and I drove 3 hours to Wisconsin convinces me that the world does not want me to see anything remotely gothy or industrial. Ugh. And I still am not over moving. I know that it takes 3 months for that feeling of doom to go away, but I'm in the greatest city in the world and spent 17 years of my life here and yet I feel completely out of place and am longing for small Midwestern towns. Arrrrgh. And L1 is driving me up the wall with her particular bad roommate quirks which make me long for the familar roommate quirks that Holly possessed. I am lonely for a place that is no longer mine. Also? A kitten is like having a third roommate. One that you don't necessarily start out liking like you presumably would a human one. I thought cats were quiet and unobtrusive. Right.
Writing: I'm doing my best to semi-ressurect (can you semi-ressurect anything?) this since I've been using it as my fandom journal (for commenting, at least) for a while, and I can't use classes as an excuse anymore. Though I went through it and tagged everything and was quite depressed when I realized how many tags there were for either being depressed or bitching about love interests. This truly is a livejournal. Which is why I have two. Still, deeply embarassing. Must work on having things to post about other than WANGST. Anyway, heaven knows my writing needs major work. Hopefully babbling to myself will help with that. Also, since I've decided the classes excuse is not valid for not leaving feedback as well, (That sentence bit is wonky) I've discovered that I suck at crit. Not just concrit, intelligent commenting in general. I have no idea how to see and talk about structure and style and plot and colors and everything. All I can give is vague sense impressions. There's got to be an article on how to do this intelligently somewhere. And it's important to me, for a reason I'm not quite sure of yet. Apparently I missed something in 5 years of college classes.
Work: And so my childhood fantasy of ultimate coolness falls once again. But I guess it's for the best. I gave notice today, a full 4 days after I started. Woo- hoo. Though I know boring office work will look better on my resume and help with the leading to the ENVS job of my dreams, it was kind of fun to pretend I could be a punk goth retail goddess. Or register lackey. But it was nice being able to keep my wardrobe and earrings and not have to perform hair acrobatics to hide the purple. And there was good music and there would have been a nice discount. ...And possibly getting comfortable and getting stuck in retail forever. Bah. I'm finishing out the weekend. This wouldn't even be a problem if I hadn't spent a month sulking about graduating. Ohhh noooo, I've graduated and have to join the real world! I can't stay in my cute little town forever! People keep on invading my hermitude! Sulk sulk whine whine.
Meeting with office people tomorrow. It is really noticable to me even without the earrings that there are many holes running around my ears. I hope that isn't a problem.
Fannnndom:
Can there be a law against vidding to Evanescance ever again? Please?
Started writing a very long treatise on how I relate to fandom. Didn't come to any conclusions. Should finish it. Should learn to use proper sentence structure in this journal. Plunged headlong back into X-Men fandom, for no apparent reason. How does googling the new gay batwoman result in reading 600 page stories about Rogue being turned into a apocalyptic pheonix death machine? I am starting to suspect that I am a secret romantic. Or rather, that I am starting to suspect that denying it to myself is no longer quite as believable. Looks like I'm gonna have to learn Premiere after all, since it looks like Steel's gonna start her first vid next week. And we can't have vid wars if I can't vid. We're starting with Secret Window. I had a glorious idea at some point, but I don't remember what it is. But I am excited! We are the dorkiest dorks ever. Horribly, horribly dorky. When she was here I was in a funk and into not moving. And now that she's back in Ohio I miss her terribly. Which is how it always works, I suppose.
Can't remember how to write.
Writing: I'm doing my best to semi-ressurect (can you semi-ressurect anything?) this since I've been using it as my fandom journal (for commenting, at least) for a while, and I can't use classes as an excuse anymore. Though I went through it and tagged everything and was quite depressed when I realized how many tags there were for either being depressed or bitching about love interests. This truly is a livejournal. Which is why I have two. Still, deeply embarassing. Must work on having things to post about other than WANGST. Anyway, heaven knows my writing needs major work. Hopefully babbling to myself will help with that. Also, since I've decided the classes excuse is not valid for not leaving feedback as well, (That sentence bit is wonky) I've discovered that I suck at crit. Not just concrit, intelligent commenting in general. I have no idea how to see and talk about structure and style and plot and colors and everything. All I can give is vague sense impressions. There's got to be an article on how to do this intelligently somewhere. And it's important to me, for a reason I'm not quite sure of yet. Apparently I missed something in 5 years of college classes.
Work: And so my childhood fantasy of ultimate coolness falls once again. But I guess it's for the best. I gave notice today, a full 4 days after I started. Woo- hoo. Though I know boring office work will look better on my resume and help with the leading to the ENVS job of my dreams, it was kind of fun to pretend I could be a punk goth retail goddess. Or register lackey. But it was nice being able to keep my wardrobe and earrings and not have to perform hair acrobatics to hide the purple. And there was good music and there would have been a nice discount. ...And possibly getting comfortable and getting stuck in retail forever. Bah. I'm finishing out the weekend. This wouldn't even be a problem if I hadn't spent a month sulking about graduating. Ohhh noooo, I've graduated and have to join the real world! I can't stay in my cute little town forever! People keep on invading my hermitude! Sulk sulk whine whine.
Meeting with office people tomorrow. It is really noticable to me even without the earrings that there are many holes running around my ears. I hope that isn't a problem.
Fannnndom:
Can there be a law against vidding to Evanescance ever again? Please?
Started writing a very long treatise on how I relate to fandom. Didn't come to any conclusions. Should finish it. Should learn to use proper sentence structure in this journal. Plunged headlong back into X-Men fandom, for no apparent reason. How does googling the new gay batwoman result in reading 600 page stories about Rogue being turned into a apocalyptic pheonix death machine? I am starting to suspect that I am a secret romantic. Or rather, that I am starting to suspect that denying it to myself is no longer quite as believable. Looks like I'm gonna have to learn Premiere after all, since it looks like Steel's gonna start her first vid next week. And we can't have vid wars if I can't vid. We're starting with Secret Window. I had a glorious idea at some point, but I don't remember what it is. But I am excited! We are the dorkiest dorks ever. Horribly, horribly dorky. When she was here I was in a funk and into not moving. And now that she's back in Ohio I miss her terribly. Which is how it always works, I suppose.
Can't remember how to write.