When I say I don't know who I am anymore? That's still true.

[redbrickrose]

My job sucks and was kind of depressing today. I didn't want to deal with that, so I spent most of the day being overinvested in Panic! at the Disco in ways that hurt me. You guys, I am stupidely overinvested in Panic! at the Disco. Like, way more emotionally invested in them than in other bandom bands, apparently. I mean, Gabe and the Cobras are probably my favorites and MCR just delights me and I can roll my eyes in reluctant, bemused affection at everything Pete Wentz is and does, but no matter what happens, I'm still having fun. With Panic! I'm only having fun *sometimes*. Other times there is this simmering, low-level, could-get-out-of-control, taking-it-kind-of-personally crazy. It's kind of uncomfortable, actually, because I'm not sure how it happened and I'm really not sure WHY, and I don't want to be crazy or overinvested. But I really can't make it stop. When did I become this person who cares about the lives of celebrities? IDEK.

Anyway, in other fannish news, this morning broadwayschatzi sent me the this blast from the fannish past. I . . . had actually never seen the Fight the Future outtakes before. I'd seen pictures, but when I was in X-Files fandom, I was mostly a lurker and I didn't really know anyone and that was before the days of youtube. I . . . was very deprived as a young fangirl. No youtube! It was the dark ages. Honestly, I don't remember how I survived without youtube or del.icio.us and four months ago, I barely used either one. Oh, bandom.

ETA: OMG TORCHWOOD TEASER. *DIES*