THIS JUST IN
broadwayschatzi just told me that the scary Denny's on the south side of Roswell (aka the Denny's of prom night infamy) has closed and is now the ALIEN SURVEILANCE CAFE. It has a DOWNED WEATHER BALLOON and a GOVERNMENT TANK in front. This is the best news I've heard all week. HAHAHAHAHA! Oh, Roswell, you are made of so much cheese, with your UFO shaped McDonalds and your alien head shaped street lights. How I DO NOT MISS YOU AT ALL.