The Quest for Bananas (Nine/Rose)
Title: The Quest for Bananas
Author: rebelsaint
Rating: PG
Fandom: Doctor Who, Nine/Rose-ish
Spoilers: The Doctor Dances
Summary: What is your quest? Bananas!
Disclaimer: I totally own Doctor Who (Season 2 box set DVDs)
Notes: For the T&C June Pic Prompts. Also, OMG, I wrote Nine!
"It's lovely," he'd said. "You'll love it," he'd promised her. "I have a craving for bananas," he'd finally admitted. So they'd gone to Villengard.
True to his word, there was a large, lush banana grove which filled the landscape as far as Rose could see. Her fingers twined with the Doctor's as he clasped her hand, and they set off through the grove together.
Jack had stayed behind in the TARDIS at his own insistence, so it was Rose and the Doctor, the Doctor and Rose, just like the old days. Not that either one of them minded having a third along, quite the opposite in fact, but it was nice to have a quiet moment together.
Now, as they found their way down a slightly worn trail, the wide leaves of the trees blended together into a canopy that allowed rays of sunshine to leak through, illuminating their path yet shading them from the overly bright afternoon. There was no sign of civilization, causing Rose to look around nervously. It was almost eerily quiet to her ears, but she trusted the Doctor not to lead her into trouble. Not intentionally, anyway.
"You're sure we're in the right place," she asked, because he'd said there was a village here, assured her repeatedly that the natives were friendly. Rose had no problems running for her life, but sometimes a girl needed a day off.
"Positive," he replied, grinning at her. "Just up ahead there's a little village where we'll ask for some bananas, they'll give us bananas, we'll thank them, and then we'll head back for the TARDIS and anywhere your heart desires."
They walked along in silence for a minute before the Doctor spoke again. "Just be polite. They don't take kindly to insults."
"Are you implying I'm rude, Doctor? I think I might be insulted by that." Her smile belied her words, tongue poking out between her teeth as she glanced up at him.
"I would never," he protested in a scandalized voice. He was grinning, though, and Rose knew him well enough to realize that he'd do just that if she were indeed being rude, but that he wouldn't mind in the least.
Rose giggled, leaning into the Doctor's side as they neared the edge of the grove. She could see the village now, just a bit past the trees, but it seemed very small, as if no more than a handful of people lived there. She pointed this out to the Doctor, and he nodded.
"Quite right. Only the most important people live in the village. Most of the natives live in the forest. It's a sign of honor to live in the village. Everything has to be brought to you if you live there, you can't do much of anything. The chieftain, the shaman, and a few others are the only ones privileged enough for the rest of the tribe to wait on them hand and foot."
She nodded in understanding, looking around for some sign of these people. The only thing she saw, however, was a monkey. Well, perhaps it was a baboon. Whatever. She'd never been any good at identifying different species unless it was something obvious, like a lion.
The monkey was sitting on a log, turned at an angle so that only its back and side were visible to them. It appeared to be inspecting something in its hands, and as they approached, Rose could see that it was a small book, about the size of a paperback.
She giggled a little at the thought of a monkey reading, and continued to glance around for signs of the village's inhabitants. The Doctor seemed much more sure of himself, though, and continued in the same direction, right toward the monkey.
They moved in front of the maybe-baboon and the Doctor gave a slight bow. Rose's eyebrows shot up as she looked closely at the monkey and saw that dangling from its mouth was what appeared to be an ordinary cigarette. Now that was odd.
"Honorable Chief," he said, "we come before you to request a boon of your most delicious bananas, such as none in the universe can compare."
Rose couldn't help it. Much as she tried to cover her mouth and keep it in, she started laughing. The Doctor gave her a dark look, clearly telling her she was being rude, but the whole situation was just so funny.
"Doctor, you're talking to a monkey that's... that's... smoking a cigarette!" She burst into laughter again, clutching at her sides as they shook with mirth. "Stop taking the piss, and let's find the chieftain so we can get your bananas."
"I have never been so insulted in my life," said a low, drawling voice. Rose looked up sharply, wondering who had spoken, when she saw the monkey close the book it was holding and take the cigarette from its mouth, flicking ashes onto the ground.
"I - I beg your pardon?" Rose stammered.
"I said, I have never been so insulted in my life," the monkey repeated. "A little hairless thing like you comes to my village and just assumes I can't be the chief. And why might that be? Because I'm not as tall as the others? Because I'm not the eldest? Hmm?"
"I'm sorry," Rose said quickly, at a loss for words. "I didn't mean to insult you."
"She's still a child," the Doctor interjected. "Just moved out from under her mum's care." Rose threw a nasty look at the Doctor, but he ignored it.
"I really am sorry," she repeated. "I just wasn't expecting you to be a monkey. The Doctor wanted bananas, and he said this was the best place to get them, and it seemed sort of absurd to get bananas from a monkey."
"We are not monkeys," the chieftain asserted. "We are the noble tribe of Vaaltek, and our bananas are the finest, as your friend here says. Now, because he is the Doctor, and because he is always welcome in our village for services rendered in the past, we will grant your boon," he said, turning toward the Doctor and away from Rose. "But I will give you a warning. Do not bring this child here again until you have taught her some manners. And do not bring any others that are so rude, either."
"Thank you," the Doctor said, giving another bow. "We are most honored." He nudged Rose with an elbow, and she performed a slight curtsey, glad they were getting off with only a warning.
Another monkey - another Vaaltek, Rose mentally corrected herself - approached with a bundle of bananas, and she and the Doctor curtseyed and bowed again.
The Doctor held the bananas in one arm and took hold of Rose's arm with his free hand. "We're very grateful," he said, "and I'll be sure to teach this one some manners."
"See that you do," the chieftain said, and with that, the Doctor practically dragged Rose out of the village. As they left, Rose could see several Vaaltek high in the branches of the trees, none looking too pleased with them. Each one seemed to be waiting for them to make a rude gesture so they could attack. It was quite unnerving.
At long last, they arrived back at the TARDIS and quickly entered, glad to be out of the banana grove and out of sight of the Vaaltek.
"How'd it go," Jack queried from beyond the console, where he appeared to be taking the Doctor's usual place, tinkering with the TARDIS.
"Ask Rose," the Doctor replied, as he peeled a banana and took a big bite out of it.
"Rose?" Jack looked at her interestedly, and she felt herself flush with embarrassment.
"Well, let's put it this way: I've never had to run away from a gang of cigarette smoking monkeys before."
"We didn't run," the Doctor corrected, swallowing a mouthful of fruit. "We walked quickly." He pointed a finger at her accusingly. "And I am never taking you to the zoo."
Author: rebelsaint
Rating: PG
Fandom: Doctor Who, Nine/Rose-ish
Spoilers: The Doctor Dances
Summary: What is your quest? Bananas!
Disclaimer: I totally own Doctor Who (Season 2 box set DVDs)
Notes: For the T&C June Pic Prompts. Also, OMG, I wrote Nine!
"It's lovely," he'd said. "You'll love it," he'd promised her. "I have a craving for bananas," he'd finally admitted. So they'd gone to Villengard.
True to his word, there was a large, lush banana grove which filled the landscape as far as Rose could see. Her fingers twined with the Doctor's as he clasped her hand, and they set off through the grove together.
Jack had stayed behind in the TARDIS at his own insistence, so it was Rose and the Doctor, the Doctor and Rose, just like the old days. Not that either one of them minded having a third along, quite the opposite in fact, but it was nice to have a quiet moment together.
Now, as they found their way down a slightly worn trail, the wide leaves of the trees blended together into a canopy that allowed rays of sunshine to leak through, illuminating their path yet shading them from the overly bright afternoon. There was no sign of civilization, causing Rose to look around nervously. It was almost eerily quiet to her ears, but she trusted the Doctor not to lead her into trouble. Not intentionally, anyway.
"You're sure we're in the right place," she asked, because he'd said there was a village here, assured her repeatedly that the natives were friendly. Rose had no problems running for her life, but sometimes a girl needed a day off.
"Positive," he replied, grinning at her. "Just up ahead there's a little village where we'll ask for some bananas, they'll give us bananas, we'll thank them, and then we'll head back for the TARDIS and anywhere your heart desires."
They walked along in silence for a minute before the Doctor spoke again. "Just be polite. They don't take kindly to insults."
"Are you implying I'm rude, Doctor? I think I might be insulted by that." Her smile belied her words, tongue poking out between her teeth as she glanced up at him.
"I would never," he protested in a scandalized voice. He was grinning, though, and Rose knew him well enough to realize that he'd do just that if she were indeed being rude, but that he wouldn't mind in the least.
Rose giggled, leaning into the Doctor's side as they neared the edge of the grove. She could see the village now, just a bit past the trees, but it seemed very small, as if no more than a handful of people lived there. She pointed this out to the Doctor, and he nodded.
"Quite right. Only the most important people live in the village. Most of the natives live in the forest. It's a sign of honor to live in the village. Everything has to be brought to you if you live there, you can't do much of anything. The chieftain, the shaman, and a few others are the only ones privileged enough for the rest of the tribe to wait on them hand and foot."
She nodded in understanding, looking around for some sign of these people. The only thing she saw, however, was a monkey. Well, perhaps it was a baboon. Whatever. She'd never been any good at identifying different species unless it was something obvious, like a lion.
The monkey was sitting on a log, turned at an angle so that only its back and side were visible to them. It appeared to be inspecting something in its hands, and as they approached, Rose could see that it was a small book, about the size of a paperback.
She giggled a little at the thought of a monkey reading, and continued to glance around for signs of the village's inhabitants. The Doctor seemed much more sure of himself, though, and continued in the same direction, right toward the monkey.
They moved in front of the maybe-baboon and the Doctor gave a slight bow. Rose's eyebrows shot up as she looked closely at the monkey and saw that dangling from its mouth was what appeared to be an ordinary cigarette. Now that was odd.
"Honorable Chief," he said, "we come before you to request a boon of your most delicious bananas, such as none in the universe can compare."
Rose couldn't help it. Much as she tried to cover her mouth and keep it in, she started laughing. The Doctor gave her a dark look, clearly telling her she was being rude, but the whole situation was just so funny.
"Doctor, you're talking to a monkey that's... that's... smoking a cigarette!" She burst into laughter again, clutching at her sides as they shook with mirth. "Stop taking the piss, and let's find the chieftain so we can get your bananas."
"I have never been so insulted in my life," said a low, drawling voice. Rose looked up sharply, wondering who had spoken, when she saw the monkey close the book it was holding and take the cigarette from its mouth, flicking ashes onto the ground.
"I - I beg your pardon?" Rose stammered.
"I said, I have never been so insulted in my life," the monkey repeated. "A little hairless thing like you comes to my village and just assumes I can't be the chief. And why might that be? Because I'm not as tall as the others? Because I'm not the eldest? Hmm?"
"I'm sorry," Rose said quickly, at a loss for words. "I didn't mean to insult you."
"She's still a child," the Doctor interjected. "Just moved out from under her mum's care." Rose threw a nasty look at the Doctor, but he ignored it.
"I really am sorry," she repeated. "I just wasn't expecting you to be a monkey. The Doctor wanted bananas, and he said this was the best place to get them, and it seemed sort of absurd to get bananas from a monkey."
"We are not monkeys," the chieftain asserted. "We are the noble tribe of Vaaltek, and our bananas are the finest, as your friend here says. Now, because he is the Doctor, and because he is always welcome in our village for services rendered in the past, we will grant your boon," he said, turning toward the Doctor and away from Rose. "But I will give you a warning. Do not bring this child here again until you have taught her some manners. And do not bring any others that are so rude, either."
"Thank you," the Doctor said, giving another bow. "We are most honored." He nudged Rose with an elbow, and she performed a slight curtsey, glad they were getting off with only a warning.
Another monkey - another Vaaltek, Rose mentally corrected herself - approached with a bundle of bananas, and she and the Doctor curtseyed and bowed again.
The Doctor held the bananas in one arm and took hold of Rose's arm with his free hand. "We're very grateful," he said, "and I'll be sure to teach this one some manners."
"See that you do," the chieftain said, and with that, the Doctor practically dragged Rose out of the village. As they left, Rose could see several Vaaltek high in the branches of the trees, none looking too pleased with them. Each one seemed to be waiting for them to make a rude gesture so they could attack. It was quite unnerving.
At long last, they arrived back at the TARDIS and quickly entered, glad to be out of the banana grove and out of sight of the Vaaltek.
"How'd it go," Jack queried from beyond the console, where he appeared to be taking the Doctor's usual place, tinkering with the TARDIS.
"Ask Rose," the Doctor replied, as he peeled a banana and took a big bite out of it.
"Rose?" Jack looked at her interestedly, and she felt herself flush with embarrassment.
"Well, let's put it this way: I've never had to run away from a gang of cigarette smoking monkeys before."
"We didn't run," the Doctor corrected, swallowing a mouthful of fruit. "We walked quickly." He pointed a finger at her accusingly. "And I am never taking you to the zoo."