(no subject)
I cry for those feelings now almost enough to give in to "him" to feel the warmth of arms around me again and a full whole heart. I wonder how much longer i can take this how much longer i can sleep with some of these thoughts and how much longer i'll have to wait for the phone conversations. What I'd do for that again those late nights. Now all these lies ...they hurt, like knives in my heart. But i think at times that if some people knew it would hurt them more the knowing that what they thought they've known for years isn't what it seems. *sigh* when will it just all end, why can't i just not care, why can't i just live alone and be full .....?