(no subject)
I sat sipping coffee at the bar littered with newspaper clippings
evidence of those before me
the window steamed with the heat from within
crashing with the rain that was falling in such a constant rhythm upon the sidewalk.
The lady behind the counter watched, giving me a look of curiosity.
Which I didn't answer.
But made my way slowly to the door of my bedroom
dark all day.
I lay. Mind wandering to...
blankness.
Blankness covering like blankets creating blackness as the steady beat of music through speakers sang me a lullaby.
Candle's fire flickering.
Blankets dissolving to memories of the night before.
The walk in the rain.
Trying to support staggering footsteps as the alcohol on my breath grew stale needing another drink.
parties and people consuming my evening
Now wandered the street,
I had abandoned the party to find more...
rum in hand, bringing about this head ache,
yet nothing came my way,
perhaps I wished for you,
a chance run in,
drunk and therefore forgivable?
I miss the real thing.
And as I wandered,
one foot in front of the other a monotonous rhythm so dull to my weary ears,
passing the street where the sad artists miserable in their own creativity crowded around bars and drinks and one other
I thought again of red flowers
laid on a green front porch
the wood cracked weather worn and wet
a beg for forgiveness
And the next memory of fire being started, cardboard boxes and statistics homework creating warmth for a living room then covered with filth and the remnants of bodies that had so tightly filled the space only moments prior, as the glow of the rising sun had come in through the sliding glass door.
And he laughed.
Running into him.
He mumbles something only he can hear not intended for my ears.
I watch the moving lips hoping for truth. Nothing came.
As he left I walked on.
Lit another cigarette.
Never looking back.
these streets where I once played the harmonica to the cheshire cat within the sky who smiled back.
as bojangles danced through my mind
my shoes worn like his
my body knowing the movement of the dance
The night we chain smoked in your bedroom smoke covering lungs like ash on the dirt chipped windowsill another bottle gone. Carpet soaking up red wine stains knocked over by unsuspecting hands. The sky was coming in through the window hinting towards morning yet we carried on. Enveloped in our own beings and the damage being inflicted. And when I left I felt the night air in a new way. The green of the porch and the bumps of the sidewalk meeting my feet as, sloppily, they followed one after another.
The rain on the cracked sidewalk sparkling up towards my eyes dazed and unfocused choosing not to care.
These days you kiss me when we meet.
Thanks for the opening of some eyes,
at least, if only, for today.
I remain hopeful and with no hurry.
walking faster now.
Waiting for a meal
and tequila.
stomach full of rice...and craving.
still ready to flee
and its happening
leaving for india...7 months...
raising money working with kids
taking drugs and drinks
still silly
still veggie
still bassing
still in love
....theres my update.
some stuff now.
evidence of those before me
the window steamed with the heat from within
crashing with the rain that was falling in such a constant rhythm upon the sidewalk.
The lady behind the counter watched, giving me a look of curiosity.
Which I didn't answer.
But made my way slowly to the door of my bedroom
dark all day.
I lay. Mind wandering to...
blankness.
Blankness covering like blankets creating blackness as the steady beat of music through speakers sang me a lullaby.
Candle's fire flickering.
Blankets dissolving to memories of the night before.
The walk in the rain.
Trying to support staggering footsteps as the alcohol on my breath grew stale needing another drink.
parties and people consuming my evening
Now wandered the street,
I had abandoned the party to find more...
rum in hand, bringing about this head ache,
yet nothing came my way,
perhaps I wished for you,
a chance run in,
drunk and therefore forgivable?
I miss the real thing.
And as I wandered,
one foot in front of the other a monotonous rhythm so dull to my weary ears,
passing the street where the sad artists miserable in their own creativity crowded around bars and drinks and one other
I thought again of red flowers
laid on a green front porch
the wood cracked weather worn and wet
a beg for forgiveness
And the next memory of fire being started, cardboard boxes and statistics homework creating warmth for a living room then covered with filth and the remnants of bodies that had so tightly filled the space only moments prior, as the glow of the rising sun had come in through the sliding glass door.
And he laughed.
Running into him.
He mumbles something only he can hear not intended for my ears.
I watch the moving lips hoping for truth. Nothing came.
As he left I walked on.
Lit another cigarette.
Never looking back.
these streets where I once played the harmonica to the cheshire cat within the sky who smiled back.
as bojangles danced through my mind
my shoes worn like his
my body knowing the movement of the dance
The night we chain smoked in your bedroom smoke covering lungs like ash on the dirt chipped windowsill another bottle gone. Carpet soaking up red wine stains knocked over by unsuspecting hands. The sky was coming in through the window hinting towards morning yet we carried on. Enveloped in our own beings and the damage being inflicted. And when I left I felt the night air in a new way. The green of the porch and the bumps of the sidewalk meeting my feet as, sloppily, they followed one after another.
The rain on the cracked sidewalk sparkling up towards my eyes dazed and unfocused choosing not to care.
These days you kiss me when we meet.
Thanks for the opening of some eyes,
at least, if only, for today.
I remain hopeful and with no hurry.
walking faster now.
Waiting for a meal
and tequila.
stomach full of rice...and craving.
still ready to flee
and its happening
leaving for india...7 months...
raising money working with kids
taking drugs and drinks
still silly
still veggie
still bassing
still in love
....theres my update.
some stuff now.