4th of July: The Freedom to Learn
I have to write this up quickly before I turn on all of the lights and clean the living room.
I have learned a few things about myself this weekend. . .
Well, first of all . . . in many of my previous blogs I have mentioned whether or not I want a kid. . . I am currently in the mood where I do not. I feel wishy-washy about so many things. . . I have to motivate myself to get thing finished or I get obsessed until I am finished. I have moments of being hyper; for example, Saturday night I clean for 4 hours straight; including scrubbing the floors. Now I barely feel like I can straighten up the living room, and put clothes away.
(Some would say I am bipolar, but I just did a little reading to discover that it’s genetic. . . however I don’t know anyone who is blood-related to me that is bipolar. I know few people who are perfectionists and have some OCD things.)
http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/bipolar-disorder-manic-depression
http://www.webmd.com/bipolar-disorder/guide/understanding-bipolar-disorder-symptoms
(Maybe it is just stupid hormones . . . why does the human system have to so delicately balanced?)
Tom and I went to see the firework with some friends at this thing called the Portfest . . . . There were kids everywhere. I just wanted to go home. I didn’t want to deal with anyone . . . I really do believe I have some aspects of anti-socialism or maybe I am just social-selective. (I have been dreading seeing my own family.)
The fireworks just weren’t worth it . . . they were short and kept get easily distracted by all of the kids and crowd there.
This made me wonder do I really have some depression or mental problem. So I took some tests which I will post on my other blog. . .